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Gay Girl’s Goggles: “The Secret Circle” SnapCap (1.13) Medallion

AFTERELLEN BAIT

This week on Fun With Faylissa: It’s Faye’s turn to be jealous. Melissa’s moment of bonding with Diana before the dance a few weeks ago did not go unnoticed. “I forgot you guys are a super duo now,” she says. “Dalissa, is it?”

Somebody in The Secret Circle‘s writers’ room has been reading fan fiction.

A little jealousy doesn’t stop Faye from wanting to make some magic with Melissa, courtesy of the Devil Spirit “herbal powder.” OK, kids, we all know that doing drugs is wrong. But isn’t ‘lissa cute when she’s high as a kite? “I had some puff pastry things — they tasted like gold.” “You don’t feel … shiny?”

I want a show with just Faye and Melissa. The Sapphic Circle.

FEELINGS, FEELINGS, FEELINGS!

Remember Lucy, the girl who saw Cassie when she mind-traveled to The Tragic Fire? Turns out she’s a psychic who was a friend of The Parental Circle and was “helping” them the night of the fire. The grownup Lucy shows up this week with a warning: The witch hunters are coming! The witch hunters are coming! Um, yeah. Psychic.

Lucy turns out not only to be a kind of lame psychic, but also a pretty evil one. Sure, we all know how bats–t crazy Dawn is. But! When Lucy stabs her in the gut, my inner bitch-lover dies a little. Dawn is a troublemaker, but she’s also Faye’s mommy. That gives her the right not to be murdered.

While Dawn is passed out on the floor bleeding to death, The Circle is at the bar celebrating Adam’s birthday. He is absolutely giddy at all the attention. But then Diana makes a toast and gets a little weepy and then Adam is all conflicted because of loving Diana all of his life and being her True North but being destined by the stars to be with Cassie.

So. Much. Angst. I don’t know why it took me this long to realize this: Adam is a lesbian. I mean, the guy has more feelings than Ezbian on PLL. Those two should get together and journal or something.

MOMENTS OF FAYE

Thank the goddess; our Faye is back on the snark trail this week.

To Jake: “You’re barking up the wrong shrub with Cassie.”

To Diana, who tells her Cassie dug up her father’s grave: “What do you expect? She’s a creepy little Stepford ghoul with dark magic and daddy issues.”

To Melissa, when Diana walks by: “You should go help. You could get ordered around by a control freak in party planning mode.”

To the circle, when they gather to “activate” the medallion: “Last time we gathered around a fire was to bind the circle – and we see how good that worked out.”

To Melissa, at the party: “I’m impressed. Diana managed to find enough random classmates to make it look like Adam has friends.”

And at the party, while Diana and Adam are emoting with all the feelings that only two lesbians can feel, Faye’s face emotes a bit, too.

THE FOREBODING

The Balcoin symbol, which we all found out a few weeks ago can be used to drain the magic from witches, in medallion form can – get this – drain the magic from witches! Methinks the circle needs to add a bit of ginko biloba to its herbal tea.

We see again that Cassie’s magic is more powerful than a locomotive witch hunter when she stops Lucy from completing the magic-draining spell. Interestingly, though, during the ceremony Melissa is the one who first feels that something is wrong. She was the first to feel the drain at the dance, too – could she be the other Blackwell spawn?

We may not have to wait long to find out. As the episode closes, Cassie returns to the Circle Club House to feel the tingly fullness of the Balcoin symbol. The winds blow and the house creaks and Cassie looks up to see: “Daddy?” (Cue scary music.)

How did you like this week’s episode of The Secret Circle? Any ideas on the ramifications of John Blackwell’s return?

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