— Later that evening, Jen is ready to screen her rough cut. Sam
mingles, merlot in hand, as Jen meets and greets her friends and guests. Elizabeth, the woman she ran into at Pet Adoption
Day, is there to lend her support for Jen’s film. Jen reintroduces Elizabeth
to Sam, but Sam doesn’t easily forget a
face. Sam raises a brow at Elizabeth and says, "How could I forget?"
Elizabeth congratulates Jen
on her screening and assures her it’s OK if she’s got a case of the
jitters — being nervous is a normal part of the process. Sam rolls
Sam: I love how
someone can’t just be nervous, there has to be a process around it.
Jen: [to Elizabeth] She has some issues with therapy.
Sam: Therapy’s crap.
But how do you really feel,
You’ve never tried therapy, have you?
Sam: Depends on what kind of therapy you’re talking about.
Elizabeth: The talking kind.
Sam: Um, I prefer the physical kind.
Elizabeth: At some point you may have to actually engage your
Really? What for?
Jen changes the subject by
asking Elizabeth when they’re going to go rowing again. With that, Sam
perks up, says maybe she should consider therapy after all and asks
Elizabeth for a card. Sam pockets Elizabeth’s card and wonders aloud
about Elizabeth’s rower’s arms. Sam is nothing if not subtle. Elizabeth
wanders off to find a good seat for the screening.
Jen hears someone calling her
name. It’s Sienna, her ex. And speaking of therapy, Sienna left Jen
for their couples therapist over a year ago, yet some ninny invited
her here tonight. That ninny’s name? Kris.
Kris waves obliviously at Jen
and Sienna. If Kris had her way, the world would be a place where there
were no unwanted pets, love was bountiful, and everyone walked around
with their pockets full of rainbows.
Sienna smiles like she never
screwed Jen with her pants on, and Jen rewards her with an awkward hug
and a "happy to have ya." Sam makes a disgusted face and wants
nothing to do with Sienna, so she goes over to stand with the ChKrisses.
After Jen joins the rest of
the girls, Sam lets her have it. "Happy to have ya?" she repeats
sarcastically. Jen says she was just being polite, but Sam thinks the
best way to greet an ex who cheated on you is with a swift kick to the
Sam reminds Jen she wasn’t
exactly at the head of the line when they were giving out backbones.
Case in point: It took Jen three weeks to tell Sienna that being late
to their anniversary dinner was no way to say "I love you."
Jen says, "It’s not like I hold back all the time." Chris
lets out a snort.
Inside the theater, the girls
are trying to enjoy Jen’s new film, but frankly it’s a snoozer of epic
proportions. Chris looks confused. Sam checks her cell phone, praying
for a call from someone, anyone. Crutch puts the time to good use, resting
her head on the girl next to her and taking a nap.
When the lights come up, the
audience emerges from the theater drowsy and bewildered. That’s two
hours of their lives they’ll never get back. Jen can’t bear to watch
people watching the film, so she waits in the lobby, chatting on her
cell with Lauren, who couldn’t make the screening because she was busy
counting her money.
Giddy with anticipation, Jen
asks the girls what they thought.
Jen, you … you’ve done something special. You have made sex … boring.
Chris: It was kind of like a PBS thing. It was better when you
Crutch: Yeah. I tried. I fell asleep.
Even Kris, forever the optimist,
has nothing to add. It’s that bad. Jen decides she has to do something
different right away.