“Desperate Housewives” mini-cap: The Big Gay Show

Previously on Desperate Housewives … Want to explore your sexual orientation? Invite a gorgeous lesbian to be your roommate.

This week’s episode, “The Chase,” was so gay. Sure, a show with that many divas always leaves the boys a bit giddy, but this week, the storyline itself was chock full of gay goodness. So, even though we’re in this for the lesbians, let’s briefly look at a few other homo happenings on Wisteria Lane.

My Three Gays

Remember Bree’s gay son Andrew? No? Well, he hasn’t been around much lately, but our brothers at AfterElton.com certainly haven’t forgotten him. Apparently, all this time he’s been working so hard that he hasn’t had time for on-camera drama. But he shows up this week, still managing Bree’s business with the “help” of a handsome young gay, Tad.

But out of nowhere, another possibly gay man, Sam (Sam Page), sweeps in to whip Bree’s poorly managed business into shape — and to expose the fact that Andrew slept with Tad. We know that Sam is up to no good because he’s also Joan Holloway’s sleazebag husband. Heads up, Bree!

Two Gays and a Baby (Maybe)

Gaby’s adventure in the Land of Gay starts when daughter Celia gets chicken pox and Gaby goes to stay with Bob and Lee, where she is the center of attention among a gang of beautiful boys. Sing it with me: “Boys in striped oxfords whose pecs are enhance-ed…”

She naps, drinks cosmos and parties like it’s 1999, which is approximately the last time she had any fun.

Of course, the story takes a Very Special turn when Gaby discovers that Bob and Lee have been trying to adopt a baby, without success. She suddenly appreciates her family and trots home with a new vision of motherhood — at least for a day or two. (Wouldn’t we love to see Bob and Lee do a twist on the lesbians-trying-to-get-pregnant cliché — attempting to steal eggs or something?)

A Lesbian Night’s Dream

Katherine is still thinking about her lesbian roomie Robin. She’s thinking about her a lot. Day and night, in fact. We don’t need Jung to interpret this.

Now that’s what I call breakfast.

Remember your first lesbian crush? The thoughts of a woman’s luscious curves and soft neck. The catch in your throat when you whiff her cologne. The glimpse of cleavage that has you imagining what is lower … lower … lower …

Um, what was I talking about again? Oh yes, the lesbian crush. Sure, all crushes are like that, but the first one is especially intense because you haven’t learned how to obsess and go about your daily life at the same time. I’m not even sure what Katherine does in her daily life, but at the moment, all she can do is think about is Robin — the gorgeous blonde lesbian with the dazzling smile wearing a decidedly non-lesbianish nightie in the next bedroom.

Since Katherine is recovering from a nervous breakdown, her therapist (Hi, J.D.!) tells her that she needs to focus on recovery, not sex, and having a hot lesbian in the house is not conducive to that. Katherine agrees to ask Robin to move out.

Oops.

Breakup sex before you’ve even been together sort of complicates a relationship. But Katherine deserves a little happiness — and Robin accepts her just as she is. DH fans seem to be divided on this pairing, but I hope Julie Benz sticks around for a while.

(BTW, I know I seem to be the only person in all of AfterEllen.com who is annoyed by her gravely voice. Full disclosure: I have a gravely voice that annoys me no end. Projection — the other white meat. Or something.)

One more story note: Karen McCluskey (Kathryn Joosten) revealed this week that she has a spot on her lung that may be cancerous — a storyline Joosten requested as a way to call attention to lung cancer, which she recently battled. I love Mrs. McCluskey and know that her victory over the big C will be every bit as sweet as Joosten’s. Meanwhile, can we request a visit by Karen’s sister Roberta?

What do you think of this week’s developments on Desperate Housewives? And what shall we call Katherine/Robin? Katbin? Roberine? Halp!

Tags: ,