For a lot of the world, this winter has been particularly brutal. If you live in one of the many cities that has endured sub-zero temperatures and thigh-high mounds of snow, a tropical getaway probably sounds pretty good right about now. So, I figured this week would be the perfect time to talk about lesbian honeymoon destinations.
Planning and executing a successful wedding requires some serious effort. You’ve got to navigate dysfunctional family dynamics, work around last-minute caterer and florist snafus, and somehow mastermind a seating arrangement that doesn’t piss off any of your guests — all while looking glamorous and behaving graciously. That’s why a relaxing honeymoon is the ideal antidote to the frenzy of a wedding — and the perfect way to reconnect with your new wife.
Unfortunately, not all cities and tropical islands roll out the welcome mat for lesbian and gay honeymooners. I don’t care how beautiful the beaches are or how amazing the cuisine may be, I would not spend one red cent of my money visiting a place where I’d be made to feel uncomfortable (or worse, put in real danger) for being gay. Nothing kills the mood like homophobia, so it’s important to do a little extra research before you book your tickets.
But, have no fear, there are plenty of beautiful, exciting and romantic places where lesbian lovers can vacation in peace. Whether you and your lady are looking for adventure, culture, or just straight up Mai Tai-fueled R&R, here are some spots that I think would make wonderful lesbian honeymoon destinations.
Hawaii
Breathtaking beaches, volcanoes, rainforests, seafood so fresh it might dive off of your plate — Hawaii really does have it all. So, it’s no wonder the Hawaiian Islands are a perennial favorite among newlyweds. Hawaii has long been at the epicenter of the gay marriage debate, but last week Gov. Neil Abercrombie signed a bill legalizing same-sex civil unions — which means you can drink pina coladas and go whale-watching in good conscience, knowing you’re supporting the economy of a state that supports you.
While gay marriage isn’t yet legal in the state, Hawaiians people have a reputation for being welcoming to same-sex visitors. After all, Hawaii is nicknamed “The Rainbow State.”
New Orleans
If you think New Orleans is nothing but booze, boobs and beads, think again. Just beyond the bustling debauchery of Bourbon Street, New Orleans has quieter areas where lovers can stroll through streets filled with quaint antique shops, impressive art galleries, European-influenced architecture, and magnolia-scented parks. Foodies will have a field day. Whether you go for a budget-friendly shrimp po’ boy from a cafe or indulge in the decadent three-course breakfast at the famous Brennan’s Restaurant, you’d have to try pretty hard to find a bad meal here.
New Orleans is lauded as the birthplace of jazz, and the vibrant musical culture remains alive and well. You can stumble into any hole-in-the-wall bar, and you will likely be greeted by live music — from jazz bands to blues singers to up-and-coming indie rock groups. Although it’s in the Deep South, New Orleanians are nothing if not laid back, so lesbian couples should feel comfortable throughout the city. Laissez les bon temps roulez!
St. Barts
Sadly, many Caribbean islands remain quite homophobic, making them less-than-ideal destinations for lesbian honeymooners. What a shame that such a beautiful region has such ugly attitudes. However, St. Barts is one (but not the only) gleaming exception. With crystal clear turquoise waters and pristine white sand beaches juxtaposed with quaint European architecture, I think it would be hard not to love St. Barts from the second you lay eyes on it.
Add to that, luxe hotels and secluded villas, gourmet dining and high-end shopping, and you’ve got yourself about 13 miles of paradise.
St. Barts has a reputation for being a celebrity playground. Remember Ellen and Portia’s envy-inducing jaunt to the island last Christmas? All of that natural beauty and imported luxury comes with a high price tag, so if you’re on a budget, don’t set your sights on St. Barts.
Barcelona
Do you and your wife want a little more action than most beach vacations offer? Then, consider Barcelona. The sexy Spanish city boasts warm temperatures all year long and a vibrant gay scene. You can spend your days taking in Barcelona’s art, architecture and culture by visiting its museums and roaming its streets. But, the cosmopolitan city truly comes alive at night. After a 10 p.m. feast of tapas and sangria, Barcelona’s bustling club scene will beckon you to indulge well into the wee hours.
If you want to relax, you’re only a 30-minute train ride from Sitges, a Mediterranean fishing village known for clear waters and scenic beaches. Not that you need any more convincing to book a trip to Barcelona, but gay marriage has been legal in Spain since 2005 — vamos, chicas!
South Africa
If you and your lady are craving some post-nuptial adventure, plan a trip to gay-friendly South Africa, where same-sex marriage has been legal since 2006. In Cape Town, you’ll find world-class restaurants, scenic beaches, romantic wine tours and a vibrant gay district. After a few days of wining and dining your new wife, whisk her away for an exhilarating safari. Not far from Cape Town, you can get up close and personal with buffalo, rhinos, zebras, baboons, giraffes and leopards roaming free in South Africa’s stunning mountain ranges. For the couple who wants it all, South Africa offers the perfect combination of thrill-seeking and relaxation.
What about the money, honey?
Are you breaking into a cold sweat at the thought of paying for a wedding and a honeymoon? If so, consider enlisting the help of your family and friends. Instead of registering for traditional gifts like blenders and bake ware, sites like thehoneymoon.com, honeyfund.com and thebigday.com allow your guests to contribute to your honeymoon instead.
Depending on the site you use, wedding guests can make financial gifts or “sponsor” a particular element of your honeymoon by popping for a sunset cruise or a romantic dinner. If you feel uneasy about asking people to help pay for your honeymoon — don’t. In a 2008 Wall Street Journal article, Peter Post, president of the Emily Post Institute said a honeymoon “is a perfectly appropriate gift to request.”
So, you’ve got clearance from the gold standard of good etiquette, and I am fairly certain you’ll have a lot more fun on an African safari than you will using your brand new mixing bowls.
Where is your dream honeymoon destination?
