Is it just me, or are everyone’s straight gal pals suddenly gay for Ruby Rose? Everyday I see a new status that says something along the lines of, “I’m not gay, but I’d love to be naked with Ruby Rose” or “I’m gay for Ruby Rose” or “Wow! Ruby is a woman and I am a woman and I have sexual feelings for this woman but I’m not gay.”
You know that Batman meme where he’s slapping Robin? Okay, good. Every time I see one of those statuses I want to Batman slap them and scream, “Don’t you know that sexuality is a sliding slope? GTFO.”
Ladies and ladies-we have found our gateway drug and its Ruby Rose. LOL RUBY ROSE IS THE STRAIGHT WOMAN’S SPRING AWAKENING! You heard it hear first! (You probably already knew that.)
In celebration of the new season of OITNB (and the sudden sexual liberation of our straight friends), I’ve put together this at-home workout you can do while you watch your favorite inmates (Poussey) GET. IT. ON.
However, while I have your attention, I’m just going to lay this video riiiigggghhtt here.
And this one riiight here.
The Orange is the New Black Workout
WARM UP
100 Jumping Jacks
SET ONE (REPEAT 3-5 TIMES)
20 Lunges
20 Squat Jumps
20 Pushups
20 Tricep Dips
1-Minute Plank
SET TWO (REPEAT 3-5 TIMES)
20 Donkey Kicks (each leg)
20 Side Plank Dips (each side)
20 Flutter Kicks
20 Bicycle crunches
20 Sit-Ups
SET THREE
20 Burpees
SET FOUR
Make out with Poussey
