Archive

Best. Lesbian. Week. Ever. (Sept. 21, 2007)

ACROSS MY EYEBALLS LIKE A BAD HALLUCINATION

My week didn’t start off very well. I usually think it’s a great idea to start the week with a movie, because, well, I love movies. But I didn’t love the new Julie Taymor (Frida) film Across the Universe. In fact, I almost walked out (and several people actually did). **minor spoilers follow**

Across the Universe sounds like it would be fairly watchable: It’s an epic anti-war tale starring Evan Rachel Wood (Once and Again) and set to some great renditions of Beatles songs. And there’s even a lesbian character. Her name is Prudence, as in “Dear Prudence.” In this still from the movie, Prudence is the one in the top right corner, above Evan Rachel Wood’s head and cuddling with the redhead:

Prudence is played by T.V. Carpio (She Hate Me), who looks like this when she’s not lying in the grass with a bunch of hippies:

Here she is in more stills from the film:

Looks interesting, right? The Beatles and a cute gay character who even wears a cheerleader outfit at one point – what more could you want? Well, maybe a better story, more fully realized characters and (I know this is asking a lot) fewer scenes that make you feel high. I’m not even talking about the “Lucy in the Sky With Diamonds” part. I was more freaked out by the scene with Eddie Izzard and the dancing blue things – but I refuse to induce my own flashback right now.

Julie Taymor told The New York Times that she wanted to do more with the character of Prudence, but the movie was already too long. (Plus, I’m sure she had to go work on the costumes for the dancing blue things.) As it is, Prudence spends most of the movie – when she’s actually in it – pining for unattainable straight women. Because who can get enough of barely glimpsed lesbians who love in a mostly unrequited way? I don’t care how many Beatles songs you set that to; I’m still going to want my $11.50 back.

If I haven’t scared you away yet, here’s one reason to see Across the Universe: Staceyann Chin has a small role in the film. Small in the sense of lines, that is – not in the sense of her hair, which is gloriously huge as usual.

Here’s a trailer to give you an idea of what to expect. A very hint of a shadow of an idea. I simply can’t prepare you.

Across the Universe has been in limited release since Sept. 14 and opens wide Sept. 21.

BUT DID P!NK GIVE THE TRAPEZE A TRY?

Here are some photos from last Saturday’s party honoring the film The Gymnast, which was released on DVD this week. Let’s start with star Dreya Weber, posing with a cardboard version of herself and costar Addie Yungmee:

Dreya later performed an aerial routine, which suggests to me that the party really needed livening up.

Here’s Suzanne Westenhoefer and her girlfriend. Looks like they skipped the aerial stuff and went right for the aperitifs.

Finally, here’s P!nk with Dreya. I guess Dreya is an Olympic hugger as well as an aerialist?

You can buy The Gymnast from the Logo shop. (P!nk not included.)

[Photo credit: Jim Dobson]

ROCKING AND ROLLING IN THE AISLES

I still can’t believe Sleater-Kinney is a thing of the past. Where have all the riot grrrls gone? But we don’t have to miss Carrie Brownstein too much. She has teamed up with Saturday Night Live goof Fred Armisen – not to rock your world, but to crack you up. In their most recent short film, “Feminist Bookstore,” they take on the world of slow sales, inscrutable flyers and hypercorrect politics.

This reminds me of the time my girlfriend and I were blithely browsing the shelves of the Toronto Women’s Bookstore, only to be abruptly escorted out at closing time. When the number of customers equals the number of employees, shouldn’t you do your best to make a sale before shooing? But I’m not bitter. Anyway, those in favor of Carrie Brownstein having a post-punk, way funny film career, raise your hand!

SHE FORGOT HOW TO SPELL U-N-I-T-Y

My own personal monarch, Queen Latifah, is on the cover of the September issue of Glamour, looking great as usual.

But you can’t judge a glamour girl by her cover photo. Inside the magazine, Latifah’s words are less than pretty – in fact, I feel inspired to remake “Had It Up 2 Here.”

Glamour: It’s always said about male actors that the minute they’re presumed gay, it’s a sign they’ve really made it.

Latifah: Sweet! That’s cool. I don’t know if that works for female actors, though. Luckily, this gay thing hasn’t messed up my appeal to the gentlemen, because I have never had any problems meeting men. Maybe they get turned on by the idea of that!

Yes, that alone is enough to make you want to tell her what she can do with her royal scepter, but it gets worse. Here’s how she feels about gay marriage:

Glamour: Do you have an opinion on gay marriage?

Latifah: I don’t know that it should be called marriage. But the idea of it is the same, and you should have the same quality of rights that a married person has. People think of marriage as something that is between a man and a woman, because it was created by God. Well, let God handle the judgment, too. You stay out of it.

The Queen backpedaled a little during a phone interview that included the gay publication Dallas Voice. Interviewer Daniel A. Kusner pointed out that disallowing the term marriage sometimes means denying the protection of domestic violence laws. Here’s Latifah’s response:

“I do support anyone who wants to be married, and I support gays and lesbians having the same rights as anyone else. So no, I don’t agree that gays and lesbians should not be protected against domestic violence, and to even try to goad me into, um, condoning something like that I think is kind of a shallow move on your behalf.”

OK, she has a point; that was a trap. But let me get this, uh, straight: You support us if we want to get married? But you don’t know that you want us to use the word marriage when we do? (And by us, I don’t mean you personally, Latifah, because I am definitely not trying to help you meet men.)

Meanwhile, in the October issue of Ebony, the Queen doesn’t deign to comment on rumors that she is romantically involved with her trainer, Jeanette Jenkins:

“No comment on that at all. I’m done commenting on all that … It’s ridiculous. I know me and that’s all I need to know.”

Sigh. This is all kind of disheartening. How can I unswear my fealty or get de-dubbed or whatever? Maybe I shouldn’t go that far, but I don’t think I’ll be curtseying anytime soon. That is, unless she rolls into town looking like this:

That picture is worth a thousand comments on “all that.”

THE ADVOCATE TURNS 40

This week The Advocate celebrated its 40th anniversary with a swanky, star-studded party at Republic in West Hollywood. Editor-in-Chief Anne Stockwell spoke about the magazine’s journey to becoming one of the most respected gay media outlets in the world, and Los Angeles Mayor Antonio Villaraigosa dropped by to celebrate The Advocate‘s big 4-0 and let all in attendance know just how pleased he is to support the gays. Attendees included actors T.R. Knight, Jane Lynch, Heather Matarazzo, Kimberly Peirce, Guinevere Turner, Michelle Wolff, Tracy Scoggins, Thea Gill, marine veteran Eric Alva and entertainment blogger Perez Hilton.

Here are just a few pictures from the party (photos courtesy of jpistudios.com):

WAIT, WASN’T SHE A SHOWGIRL?

AfterEllen.com reader Neobarker encouraged me to watch this video for the song “Lola” by the French band Superbus. It may not be apparent on first viewing (especially if your French is as bad as mine), but the song is about teen lesbians.

According to Neobarker, the chorus translates as, “Hello, Lola! My heart goes boom and I’ve got long hair like a boy. Hello, Lola! Like a boy, this is the first time for me, your eyes make me go boom!”

All I can say is “Viva la France!” – and why do I have a sudden urge to watch American Beauty? My eyes, they go boom!

ANIMATED DYKES ON BIKES

If you haven’t heard of the comic book Jane’s World, you’re missing out. I mean, look at this:

Jane’s World is full of colorful (er, black-and-white) characters, and you’ll be hooked after just a few pages. Here’s a video in which creator Paige Braddock explains the genesis of Jane’s World and takes us through her creative process. She names Gilligan’s Island and Three’s Company as influences, and that makes her awesome in my book. (Or in my graphic novel, in this case.)

Visit the Jane’s World website to read sample pages and download issues at unbelievably reasonable prices.

THEY LIKE US, THEY REALLY LIKE US

Isn’t it great when celebrities you already love give you another reason to love them? Several of the stars of Ugly Betty, Brothers & Sisters and Grey’s Anatomy speak out in GLAAD’s new “Be an Ally & Friend” campaign. Here’s the PSA, featuring Ana Ortiz, Sara Ramirez, Rebecca Romijn, Kate Walsh, Becki Newton and Rachel Griffiths:

Friends, huh? Does this mean I can invite Sara Ramirez over to play Karaoke Revolution? Never mind; she’d kick my butt. (Kate Walsh, you’re not invited, because you clearly need a good, long nap.)

DEATH BY GRAPHIC DESIGN BRILLIANCE

In last week’s column, Sarah threw down the Photoshop gauntlet and challenged you to gay up the poster for Iyari Limon‘s new movie Death by Engagement. AfterEllen.com reader Vanessa P. took that challenge, and the result is way beyond our wildest dreams. Here’s the original, to refresh your memory:

And here’s Vanessa’s version:

Iyari, Michelle Rodriguez, Jodie Foster and Kristanna Loken all in one poster?! “You won’t come out alive,” but you might come out looking a lot more like a movie we want to see!

DON’T TALK OF LOVE; SHOW ME

A few weeks ago, Karman told you about the Spanish show Supermodelo, which is sort of like America’s Next Top Model, but without the America part. On a recent episode (thanks, Rogue!), contestants pretended to film a commercial and were required to kiss a male model. Out lesbian Jessica RuÀz just couldn’t quite get it right. So two female acting coaches demonstrated the proper technique. Here’s a clip:

Worked like a charm! The next time someone doesn’t understand what I’m trying to say in a recap or a blog post, I’m going to grab the nearest hottie and practice kissing. It won’t help me explain myself, but it might break up my day a little.

Check Rogue’s blog for more on Supermodelo.

HELP WANTED

Sherrie Inness, a Miami University professor who has written and edited a ridiculous number of really awesome nonfiction books about girls and women, had a devastating accident on August 31st when she was hit by a truck while riding her bike. She suffered major injuries and is now in a rehabilitation center, where she’s isolated, in a lot of pain, and facing a slow and uncertain recovery process. She would love to get some words of support, so we thought we’d mention this in the column in the hopes that some of you will reach out to her. She can receive mail through her university address: Sherrie Inness, Department of English, 1601 University Boulevard, Miami University, Hamilton, OH 45011.

For those of you are better with email than snail mail, a friend of Sherrie’s has created a gmail account for her and offered to print out any emails she receives there and mail them to Sherrie. Please take a moment and send some words of support to [email protected].

And while you’re at it, do yourself a favor and pick up one of her books, which include The Lesbian Menace: Ideology, Identity, and the Representation of Lesbian Life; Tough Girls: Women Warriors; Geek Chic: Smart Women in Popular Culture; and Action Chicks: New Images of Tough Women in Popular Culture.

Seriously, how can you not love these books based on the titles alone? Sherrie needs to get well soon so she can publish more of them!

ATTENTION NYC READERS: AFTERELLEN.COM WANTS YOU!

We’re having a casual get-together for AfterEllen.com readers in Manhattan on Saturday, Sept. 29, when Karman will be in town visiting Sarah and Lori. Here’s your chance to buy them a drink, meet other AfterEllen.com readers and dish about bad lesbian movies, fun T-shirts, or why you love/hate this season of South of Nowhere. For more details, see Sarah’s blog post.

MORE JILL/MAEVE. NAKED. (UM, NOT TOGETHER. SORRY.)

After an avalanche of requests for fun Jill Bennett and Maeve Quinlan T-shirts, Lori convinced the two actresses to lend their photos and names for a good cause (the happiness of lesbians everywhere). They’re good sports like that, and all the proceeds will go to charity.

The products are showcased below (some designs were even suggested by AfterEllen.com readers). You can see all the Jill and Maeve products – and purchase them – at http://www.zazzle.com/lorgra/products. Although all the designs are shown on basic white T-shirts, you can order them in a zillion different styles and colors, and they’ll ship to 67 different countries. Enjoy!

BUT WAIT, THERE’S MORE!

South of Nowhere‘s midseason finale airs tonight on The N, complete with Spencer in a raincoat – and nothing else, apparently! (Look for the We’re Getting Nowhere gang’s vlog about the episode in the first week of October.)

A new Lesbian Weeds Watching vlog episode was just posted today, a new She Made Me Watch This! episode will be posted late tonight or Saturday morning, and the first Top Model vlog from the We’re Getting Nowhere gang will be posted on Monday night

A few more video blog updates: Logo has now made She Made Me Watch This! available on your cell phone if you have Sprint, Verizon or Helio. And for those who’ve asked: Yes, most of our video blogs will be available to download (free) on iTunes in the next month or two. Lastly, we have a new Video Blogs page that will always show the newest episode of each video blog, with links to all episodes of each vlog.

AfterEllen.com reader StarryMag alerted us to this news: Out bisexual and former America’s Next Top Model contestant Michelle Deighton is carrying ex-Survivor contestant Jonny Fairplay’s baby. Will the kid learn to walk on a runway, a plank, or both?

The Lifetime vampire drama Blood Ties, starring Christina Cox, returns Oct. 12. No word on whether the second half of the season will be any gayer than the first (which wasn’t even a little bit gay).

If you’ve been searching for a children’s show that reflects “the fabulous diversity of nontraditional families,” look no further! Dottie’s Magic Pockets is now on DVD. No, it doesn’t have anything to do with “pocket gay friends.”

David Mamet’s lesbian-themed play Boston Marriage opens in Melbourne, Australia this week.

Out actress Jane Lynch has joined the cast of Big Brothers, also starring Seann William Scott and Paul Rudd. Why are my favorite actresses signing up for crass boy-oriented flicks lately? (I’m looking at you, Susan Sarandon in Mr. Woodcock!)

Watch this video of a Republican mayor reversing his stand on gay marriage because his daughter is gay. You’ll be glad you did.

Jodie Foster used the word “partner” in an interview with the Denver Post last weekend, which means Sarah and Lori have spent the week trying not to get their hopes up that she’ll grant them an exclusive interview for their video blog.

The N’s website now offers a game called The Hook Up, in which you play the new girl in town. Log in and enjoy a little virtual romance with one of three guys – or with a girl.

Starting in summer 2008, Logo will be airing The L Word. That’s right: More opportunities to swoon and scowl, often in the same five minutes!

Something to look forward to on Monday: our first-ever interview with Melissa Etheridge! Turns out she and wife Tammy are both fans of AfterEllen.com. Who knew? But since we’re even bigger fans of them, that works out nicely!

That’s it for this week! Check back next week for another edition of Best. Lesbian. Week. Ever.

Lesbian Apparel and Accessories Gay All Day sweatshirt -- AE exclusive

Related Articles

Leave a Reply

Back to top button