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Morning Brew: Lady Gaga joins Amber Heard in “Machete Kills,” Alison Bechdel talks time-traveling with Jane Austen

Good morning, Brewbies, and welcome to Olympic Opening Ceremony Day!

Alison Bechdel is profiled in The New York Times “By The Book” column this week. She talks about what she’s currently reading (Jeanette Winterson‘s memoir), what book made her want to write (Harriet the Spy), and her fantasy of time-traveling with Jane Austen:

I used to have an elaborate fantasy about getting to be Jane Austen’s tour guide to the modern world. But then I started thinking it through too realistically, and imagined her having a psychotic break, and the whole thing lost its hold on me.

Lady Gaga is set to make her feature film acting debut in Robert Rodriguez‘s Machete Kills. Paying Lady Chameleon, about whom little is known except that she’s probably a shape-shifter, Gaga joins a star-studded cast including Amber Heard, Jessica Alba, Zoe Saldana, and Sofia Vergara. The second film in the Machete trilogy will hit theaters next year.

Pink has debuted the music video for her new song “Blow Me (One Last Kiss)” from her forthcoming album The Truth About Love.

I’m not sure why people are calling it her “comeback single.” My iPod seems to think she never left.

Remember when Florida Lt. Governor Jennifer Carroll defended herself against allegations that she had a lesbian affair by saying “black women that look like me don’t engage in relationships like that”? Well, she’s really sorry about saying something so ridiculous, especially now that she knows how angry she made her LGBT constituents. In a written apology to Equality Florida Executive Director Nadine Smith, which she read over the phone, Carroll said:

I would like to take this opportunity to express my sincerest apologies to anyone I may have offended with my recent comment. It is wrong and inexcusable to make a comment that hurts people, and that was not my intention. As a Christian, my faith guides me to love and respect all people … The false charges that have been lodged against me are no excuse for what I have said that may have been hurtful to members of your organization and to other Floridians. Please know that I am committed to treating every person with the utmost courtesy, respect and dignity and I hope you will accept my heartfelt apology.

Target has released a new same-sex wedding registry advertisement and it’s pretty darn adorable.

Here’s hoping they follow it up with one for the gay ladies soon!

Speaking of same-sex wedding victories, Amazon founder Jeff Bezos happily handed over 2.5 million(!) dollars to back a ballot initiative that would legalize gay marriage in Washington state. Says The Atlantic Wire:

According to The New York Times, the donation was spurred by an email sent to Bezos just last weekend, from a former Amazon employee who is now leading the fundraising effort for pro-referendum organizers. Jennifer Cast, who was one of the online retailer’s earliest employees, told her former boss the story of her struggles as a young lesbian and the importance of the issue to her and her longtime partner, who are raising four children together. Writing that “To be very frank, we need help from wealthy straight people who care about us and who want to help us win,” she implored Bezos to give $100,000 to $200,000 to support the cause. The email went out on Sunday and on Tuesday, he responded with the offer of $2.5 million.

Finally, kick off your weekend with this PBS-sanctioned Bob Ross remix. It’ll make you smile, I promise.

Have a beautiful weekend, friends. If you’re looking for me, I’ll be parked in front of NBC’s Olympics coverage every hour of every day.

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