A Spirited Community

Where has that left black lesbians? We are caught in the crossfire, banging our brown fists against the large church doors, begging people who claim to be sanctified not to be so mean.

Writer Dorothy Harris, in her contribution to the Spirited anthology, describes herself as a saved African-American Pentecostal lesbian mother butch daddy who felt betrayed by the church. “I am burdened by the teachings of my people who taught me that God is love while simultaneously teaching me that God doesn't love homosexuals and therefore does not love me,” she writes. “My first step in my spiritual healing was to leave the church.”

In her essay, Tawanna Sullivan wonders if to stay part of the church she'll have to check her lesbian self at the door. Eventually she realizes that “if my church family doesn't accept me fully and completely it isn't really a family.” Though she preserved her relationship with God, she decided to “let the church go.”

Not all of the essays are about Christianity or about loss. In her piece, “Buddha on the Land,” Mona de Vestel describes healing her past and discovering Buddhism in a sweat lodge at the Michigan Womyn's Music Festival. Because of her practice, de Vestel writes, she has “all the tools to develop the life I have always wanted.”

Lisa Moore hopes Spirited provides healing. “As the essays came in, I realized how much religion and spirituality mean to LGBT people,” Moore says. “This book has been a journey.”

Moore's own journey continues. A native of New Orleans, she learned that much of her hometown had been destroyed by last year's hurricane just as she was putting the final editorial touches on Spirited. “A fire, a flood, what's next? Locusts?” she says jokingly, acknowledging the one-year anniversary of Katrina.

Still, Moore knows she's blessed. RedBone Press, which she started in 1997 with a $4,000 loan from a friend, is still going strong. Nearly a decade after the publication of RedBone's first book, Does Your Mama Know? An Anthology of Black Lesbian Coming Out Stories, Moore will put out her ninth book this year. She makes a living doing what she loves: running an independent lesbian/gay press. And she even gets to work with her lover of two and a half years, who designs the book jackets.

“The fire and also Katrina taught me that you need community,” Moore says. “I thought I was just this one-woman publishing company, but I'm not. I am part of a whole.”

Get Spirited: Affirming the Soul and Black Gay/Lesbian Identity at amazon.com

Linda Villarosa is a former editor of The New York Times and executive editor for Essence magazine, and has authored and co-authored several books. She currently lives in Brooklyn, New York, with her two children and her partner, Jana. Write to Linda at linda@afterellen.com