But,
says Ellen, "“It’s the first time that
I’ve known in every cell of my being that I’m
with somebody for the rest of my life.” The article
includes a photo of Ellen and Portia together with their
two moms, and Betty DeGeneres tells People, “They
are an amazing couple. It seems written in the stars. They
just glow.” Just in case anyone wasn't clear about
the perfection that is this union, People also
got quotes from the Pope ("Many blessings upon them--as
long as they don't try to become priests"), Portia's
on-screen Arrested
Development dad ("No touching!"), and
Mary Cheney ("No comment").
Ellen
also reveals in the interview that Portia recently bought
her a horse named Puff, and a pregnant cow. Finally, an
answer to the age-old question of what to get the woman
who has everything!
ME
AND YOU AND ALL THE STRAIGHT WOMEN WE KNOW
What do Angelina Jolie,
Kate
Moennig, Jodie
Foster, and Miranda
July (the queer director of the new indie movie Me
and You and Everyone We Know) have in common besides
acting and, uh, other things? Women dig 'em.
USA
Today columnist Whitney Matheson included Jolie, Moennig,
and July in her new list
of the 11 Sexiest Women. "Nothing's sexier than a woman
full of ideas, and July embodies that trait more than me,
you or anyone else I know", Matheson says of July,
and about Moennig, she gushes, "As Shane, a womanizing
hairdresser with a heart of gold, Moennig commands every
scene she's in...[she] is the type of woman who could play
an 80-year-old garbage collector and still somehow make
it sexy."
And
finally, about her number-one pick, Jolie, Matheson says,
"To me, there's no comparison...Jolie is an artist,
an activist and a parent. Sure, she's claimed a fondness
for knives and has more tattoos than I have shoes …
but that's all part of the charm. Right?" Not surprisingly,
lesbians find her knives and tattos charming, too--Angelina
also topped the list of a new poll
this week asking UK lesbians which celebrity they'd most
like to marry (Jodie Foster came in second, with 18% of
the vote, followed by Kiera Knightley and Charlize Theron).
But don't get your hopes up, ladies: something tells me
that in a race to marry to Angelina Jolie, the lesbians
would get trampled by all the straight women like Matheson
trying to get there first.
RATINGS STUNTS: THE UNIVERSAL LANGUAGE OF TELEVISION
Taking a page out of American Sweeps tactics, British
TV series EastEnders has a lesbian kiss planned
in November, between the characters of Sonia Fowler (Natalie
Cassidy) and Naomi Julien (Petra Letang). The kiss happens
when Sonia confides in Naomi that her marriage is trouble,
to which Naomi responds by unexpectedly declaring her love
for Sonia and then kissing her. Sonia reportedly reacts
by running back to her husband and jumping into bed with
him.
Ah
yes, the old "wait until their marriage is in trouble
and then pounce" approach to seducing straight women.
It's still the recruiting tool of choice for lesbians who
don't like to work too hard to earn their toaster oven.
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