“Chicago Fire” recap (2.18): Shawson and the Seven Dwarves

Previously on Chicago Fire, Rebecca Jones became the firefighter on Truck 81 and rubbed just about everyone the wrong way. But her father, Overlord of Firefighters, pissed even more folks off when he asked Casey and Boden to find a way to send his wee little girl to the safety of the PR department. Dawson told Jones the plan and sent Jones sprinting through Chicago in her Louboutins. Mouch asked Shay for dating advice which is a little like asking someone with a suspended license for driving lessons. She told him to sign up for a dating site catering to the elderly and he objected on the grounds that he’s not a member of AARP (yet). Shay and Dawson made a date to leave the gents behind and spend a weekend in a cabin.

At Casey and Dawson’s home of simmering discontent, Casey is asking if it’s Shay’s birthday. Like Dawson needs a reason to spend a weekend in a romantic, remote cabin with a gorgeous lesbian. He’s totally cool with that (and her Elmer Fudd hat) but not cool with the fact that Dawson tipped Jones off to the nonsense her dad was trying to pull behind her back. Casey is hurt because he wanted to tell Jones and wishes Dawson came to him first. Dude, you two are terrible at telling each other shit. But maybe Casey forgot about not telling Dawson he was leaking blood from his ear. Either way, he’s cranky enough that he thinks they should just stop looking for a new place together. Shay honks, because she’s classy, and Dawson hurries off. Go spend time with that wascally wabbit, Dawson. She understands you.

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At 51, Herrmann is bitching because porridge is on the menu. The Chief made it because Jones is late. Mouch has lost his appetite because his profile on GoldenOldies.com is not getting the kind of attention he hoped it would. The problem, the boys decide, is his picture which makes him look like some kind of 1970’s porn star and the fact he asked a lesbian what she looks for in a man. While Shay and Dawson are in the north woods, Chout and McAuley are back to annoy everyone.

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Jones bombs into Boden’s office and asks how long she has until Casey and Boden ship her out. Boden has her back and will do whatever it takes to protect her job. Casey tells her she needs to decide if she is going to take on her old man or take the job in PR. She decides to take a personal day to figure it all out. Casey thinks there might be something more going on and Boden tells him to check in with Jones throughout the day.

They get called out to a grease fire but there’s no one there doing the cooking. Turns out the chef, Gavin, wandered up to the roof to talk in his phone and fell between two buildings. He’s stuck in there like Baby Jessica. Severide and the Squad boys start chiseling out pieces of the wall. Severide talks some smack over the radio to Gavin to keep his heart rate up so he doesn’t collapse when they get him out.

After saving Baby Jessica, Severide gets called to the precinct because Bloom, the Denver firefighter who nearly lost him arm in the last episode, has been picked up for DUI. Severide tells him he needs rehab. Bloom gives Severide a song and dance about how his painkillers mixed with a dozen beers and how he totally has it under control. But when Severide starts to leave he changes his tune and says he’ll go to rehab. Severide vouches for him with Platt, the desk sergeant, and says he owes her one. She says how about dinner? Severide panics for a second and she says “just fucking with you. I would break you in half, pretty man.”

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Shay and Dawson arrive at an idyllic cabin in the snow-covered woods, the likes of which is usually reserved for the cover of romance novels. They meet the proprietors who seem like a nice couple who Shay says are Dawson and Casey in a few years. The mere mention of Casey is enough to make Dawson cry and run into Shay’s arms. And thus began several hundred fan fiction stories.

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Dawson cries and wonders what exactly is holding her back from finding a place with Matt. Shay does that thing where she pretends to be interested but is really counting down how long she has to fake it before she can suggest they start drinking.

Back at 51, Casey and Severide flirt in the bathroom. They laugh, toss toiletries at each other, and make eyes across the expanse of stainless steel sinks. Casey is worried he and Dawson are moving too fast. Severide tells him there’s no such thing as moving too fast. He gives Casey the name of the U-Haul place he and Shay use. This might be the downside of being a lesbro; you tend to pick up the bad habits along with the good.

In the common room, the guys seem to think Dawson and Shay are out looking at possible wedding venues. Writers, you have another way to start those fan fics. Otis thinks it’s time for Casey to enjoy his waning freedom with a poker night, preferably at the apartment he and Cruz swiped from under Casey’s nose. While they plan their sausage party, Mouch has gotten a hit on his profile from a cute lady who works in a nursing home. McAuley tells Mouch that people who work in nursing homes have a high rate of depression. This guy is what you would get if you crossed Debbie Downer with the kid from Jerry Maguire.

Boden wants to know what Severide is doing taking in strays. Severide was in Bloom’s shoes not too long ago and wants to help but he needs Boden to make the calls (it’s a phone, Severide, not a snake). Boden agrees but he senses there may be more to Bloom’s problem than a sore back. Speaking of more going on that meets the eye, Casey leaves Jones a message asking if he can help.

They are all called out to try to talk down a guy who would like to jump to his death in the middle of a mall. Casey talks to him about how it’s fine that his girl left him, he’ll find another. Casey, you’re not finding another Dawson. Casey tells Jerry he’s not really serious about killing himself, makes fun of his haircut and Mr. Rogers sweater, and basically dares him to jump. He does, but Spiderman Severide leaps and catches him first.

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Back in the land of hot cocoa, roaring fires, and simmering subtext is Shawson. They are sitting by the fire going through all the stressful things in Dawson’s life. Shay calls Jones a pill but Dawson defends her. Dawson calls Casey unsupportive but Shay defends him. Just how much alcohol is in that cocoa? They migrate to the couch to make out to listen to the perfect couple bicker like Al and Peg Bundy.

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