“Chicago Fire ” recap (1.17): “Hork it back up.”

Dawson gives Severide her best “dude your roommate is crazy, let’s chat outside” nod and they head out of the room to chat. Dawson is worried and Severide reminds her of the last time Clarice dumped Shay. They watched a guy draw a dragon tattoo on her back for an hour before Shay backed out. Dawson says this feels different, more cliche than even a dragon tattoo. Dawson thinks Shay seems serious and Severide, the idiot, says “so she has a kid, so what?” Please let my parents never have said “so we have a kid, so what?” when contemplating adding me to the family. It’s not a tattoo, it’s not a puppy, it’s a kid. You can’t have it removed, you can’t have a neighbor come over twice a day to feed it and take it for walks. It’s a tiny human.

Otis and Herrmann have a heart warming chat about the bar through a bathroom stall door. It’s gross and I’m going to just highlight the important stuff. The guy from whom they bought the bar had a falling out with Clifford forty years ago and hasn’t heard from him. So they just need to find him, give him back his medal, and hope he doesn’t want half the bar. These guys always have the best plans.

Dawson and Mills are enjoying a romantic chat by the festering garbage behind the station. Mills asks if Dawson wants to go to the Academy dinner with him and his mom. Nothing says romance like a night out with your mom chaperoning like you’re going to a seventh grade dance and then to DQ afterward. They decide to come out as a couple at the Academy dinner and they are cute and goofy and as nervous as I was the first time I brought my girlfriend to our hockey formal. Ahh young lesbians.

This romantic moment is interrupted by a Shawson call out to an apartment where a guy has gone blind. In the course of examining him they discover that he can’t see because he has been shot in the head. While they are asking him if he shot himself another shot comes through the floor taking the life of a lamp. They get him out to the rig and Shay goes back in to help the guy in the apartment below who has also been shot. She works on him until the second ambulance arrives. She’s about to leave when she hears a baby cry. She goes looking through the apartment and finds a little guy in a back room. Her face is a riot of concern and happiness as she picks him up and soothes him. Dawson comes looking for Shay and is about to tell her to get her ass in the ambulance when she stumbles on the Madonna con Bambino. Shay and the baby coo at each other and Dawson’s expression softens. She averts her gaze because sometimes it’s hard to look at someone in this sort of exposed, intimate moment without feeling awkward.

Outside, Shay watches as the baby is taken in by the police and children’s services. She turns as she hears the mother (who also appears to have been the shooter) screaming “don’t you take my baby.” Shay’s face betrays her feelings about having a baby taken from her, even if Wesley wasn’t hers. Shay certainly has the look of a woman desperate to have a baby.

Mills and Dawson are enjoying a little afternoon delight. Dawson says she thinks she prefers day sex for some reason and Peter Mills is not one to disagree. But he’s miles away from her, thinking about his dad, and the information he found playing Nancy Drew at the Fire Academy archives. He thinks it’s weird that his dad, Boden, and Papa Severide were all in the same house and no one will talk to him about his father. It’s almost like they are hiding something, kid.

Mills’ mom is waiting in a restaurant when Boden walks in. They exchange awkward smiles and she’s doing an unconscious Freudian thing with the stem of her wine glass. She demands to know what Benny is doing in town and Boden’s a little hurt that she doesn’t want to chat with him about anything else but Severide’s dad. She’s freaking out that Benny is going to be at the dinner and that he might say something that would hurt Peter. She wants him to try to stop Benny from saying anything. She asks him “do you really not care if it all comes out?” Man, I hope whatever it is, it’s juicy and doesn’t involve pregnant lesbians.

At the home of Shay and Severide, Benny’s making awkward conversation. “So, lesbian, huh?” are his actual words and Severide is mortified but no worries it gets weirder. “You guys have come a long way with marriage rights and the like.” Shay gives an amused nod of agreement as her face screams get me out of this conversation. No such luck, sweetie. “Tough growing up?” She says no and then tries to plug the Chicago Fire writers lesbian street cred by saying that two things that are tough growing up gay are confusion and lack of acceptance. She didn’t have any trouble with either, so smooth sailing. Hand these folks a GLAAD award!

Severide is as embarrassed as a school kid whose parent make a big deal of giving hugs and kisses at the schoolhouse door. Benny’s not done, he wants to know if Shay can help find Kelly a good woman. Here’s a tip Benny, Shay couldn’t find a good woman for herself and ended up back with Cruella. Dad offers to set Kelly up at the Academy dinner and Severide panics and asks Shay to be his date. She tries to get out of it by saying she’ll be boring since she’s not drinking and he realizes what every non-pregnant partner realizes; pregnant ladies are all-time designated drivers, enjoy it while you can.

Shay wanders off and Papa says he is going to make more of an effort to leave the campground to spend time with his son. It’s sweet until he tells Severide to make sure that Mills can be trusted before he lets him on Squad. All this hinting and passive aggressive bullshit feels like a cocktail party with my relatives. Spit it out, people.

They are all called out to a car accident. The driver is missing but there is a crushed bike messenger under the car and a hurt passenger. Mills finds the driver staring down at the river, preparing to jump. Mills talks him down, assuring him that the bike guy is fine. It’s a lie but it keeps the guy from jumping.

Back at the house Mills is feeling proud of himself and Dawson is proud of her little puppy too. Mills tells her that he can’t wait to come out as a couple and they do it right there is the halls. Poor Otis gets an eyeful of them making out and Casey just wants to go to the bathroom without having to see them suck face. When they are done, Otis calls Dawson in for another meeting of the bar brain trust.

Herrmann opens the meeting by asking if Mills is okay since Dawson needed to give him mouth-to-mouth. Otis found Clifford Baylor’s address so he thought they would mail the medal to the guy. Dawson leans back in her seat and tells these two dipwads that they are going to hand-deliver the medal and make sure everything about the bar is on the level because the dude they bought the place from is as slippery as an eel and it’s the right thing to do.

Mills runs out to talk to Severide and asks permission to have a drink with Benny. It’s cute that he wants permission to date his father and everything but Severide doesn’t want to play matchmaker. He’s like, ask him yourself dude, I’m not his social secretary. Mills admits that he just wants to know how his dad died.

The three bar-keteers are at the nursing home and they speak to Clifford. He’s thrilled to have the medal back. When they ask about the contract Clifford says the other guy, Spiro, got the bar and he got the girl. Spiro never thought Clifford and the lady would last but they made it forty years together. They are about to go but Dawson wants to know the lady’s name. The next scene is these three wheeling Clifford out to the bar to unveil that they named the bar “Molly’s” after his wife.

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