“Chicago Fire” (2.5) recap: Last the night

Severide and Zoya are making sweet hetero love.  She’s wearing a tank top, as you do. I’m guessing, this isn’t my area of expertise. I’m just going to throw something out there. Boys do you not know that there are boobs under there? Anyway, she tells him she’s a little sad because she has to go back to Russia. Severide, take a tip from Shay and mystery hottie, maybe if you worked your game out without the shirt/bra boob barrier these ladies would stop leaving you for Europe? Just a theory.

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Downstairs, Otis is throwing a legen-wait for it-dary Jenga party with Mouch, Cruz, and Shay. Shay’s face tells you everything you need to know about the lameness. As soon as Severide and Zoya appear, Cruz runs away, and Shay takes the opportunity to go to bed. Nice party David Silver, way to go.

Across town, Mills is making out with Isabella and things are about to get more interesting until he calls her Gaby. Dude, get your head out of your ass. Meanwhile, Gaby Herrmann and Otis are licking their wounds over how little money they are making. Arthur shows up with Jay to collect his money. He tells them that Game Day wouldn’t be killing them if they had made him a partner. They promise to have all his money by Friday and he smiles and then throws a chair through the glass display case. Jay just smiles in the background while Dawson’s chest heaves as she tries to calm down from having glass in her hair. Herrmann starts ranting about having a gun behind the bar when Dawson gets a call from useless Jay and goes skipping out to meet him. He says they don’t have enough to take Arthur down and that it was”killing him” not to defend her. Whatever dude, you’re lame and Dawson deserves better.

Casey visits Heather and prison and tries to buck her up with talk of her kids and getting her moved to a different prison. She doesn’t look so good, she needs to spend more time in the library with Taystee and Poussey. At the house, Zoya rns up to Severide and tells him there’s a way she can stay, they just have to get married. Whoa, hold up lady.  He may live with Shay but he leaves the U-Hauling to the experts.

McLeod is waiting in her standard issue, Slytherin green coat to talk to Benny. They walk along the waterfront and talk about her plans for 51. She wants to save it but she needs someone she can trust running the place. Someone like Benny. Benny was the only one who didn’t see that coming. How long before these two are role playing Umbridge and Percy Weasley?

Everyone gets their physical results back and Herrmann is so excited by his score he takes his shirt off. Mills rushes off to tell the Chief about his results. Boden has an elevated level in his blood that is an indicator of asbestos poisoning. Mills starts talking about tests the Chief needs and specialists but Boden cuts him off and tells him to leave the report on the desk. Mills complies and leaves Boden to ponder his mortality.

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Shay is drinking wine and listening to Amy tell some lesbians about interest rates. When Shay makes a move for more wine, Amy covers the mouth of the glass. Amy, let’s leave the controlling bullshit to the likes of Bette Porter, okay? You don’t have the swagger to pull it off.  Amy and her friends crack that they should hide the silverware because Devin has arrived.  They call her Devin-eleven because she’s open 24/7.  Shay looks around and what do you know? It’s Sexytimes McGee from the bar.  Shay wanders away from boring Amy and just happens to run into Devin.  They take it to the side alley.

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Then they go back to Shay’s apartment and have lots of sex on screen. Oh wait, no. Casey is playing a rousing, and equally interesting (NOPE!) game of Risk with the Darden boys. You’re killing me, Smalls! Casey, the only guy who can cockblock a lesbian from half a city away. Anyway, Griffin wants to come back to the firehouse. Hooray! I’m so glad we missed lesbian sexy times for this.

At Molly’s, Herrmann has a plan for security. An expensive plan. Otis suggests selling the bar. Cruz flirts with Zoya and does everything but say he’ll marry her so she can stay. Idiot. A second later  they hear an alarm and run out to see Game Day up in flames. While everyone rushes out, Dawson, Cruz, Herrmann, and Otis run toward it.

In McLeod’s office the Chief shows up and says he’ll do anything to save 51. He hands in his resignation. Benny and Kelly are sitting outside having a beer when Benny drops the bomb that he’s taking over 51. Severide looks shocked and then gets up and walks away. What the fuck, pop?

We’ve got three weeks before the next episode, so there’s plenty of time to process. What did you think of this week’s episode?

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