“Cashmere Mafia” Recaps: Episode 1.7 “Dog Eat Dog”

 
 

The cost of doing business — Meanwhile, Caitlin is trying to pull
off the save of the century. Her assistant tells her the only space available
in Midtown for her fashion show is going to cost an astronomical $75,000.

She decides to go for
broke, literally, because it’s going to have to come out of next quarter’s
budget. A good call, considering she might not be there by next quarter.

Elsewhere in some art
museum, Juliet is looking at paintings with Len Billionaire. There isn’t
another soul in the place, except for one bored guard, which makes me think Len
arranged a private viewing for his date. He asks her what she thinks of the
large contemporary canvasses, and she shrugs. Art. Eh.

I used to love Joan
Miro
when I was a kid because I thought it was cool a lady had painted such
neat stuff. Then, when I was about 9, I found out Joan Miro was a man. The first of many disillusionments.

My second art
disappointment came a year later when my father offered to take my sister and
me to a museum. "Do you want to see the Freak Collection?" he asked. I
answered with a lot of jumping up and down and chanting "yes!" over
and over. The whole car ride there, I imagined the two-headed people and
cyclops babies that awaited me.

Once we got there, I
found no 800-pound man, nor a lady with a snake growing out of her head. Instead,
we walked through room after room filled with large, old oil paintings and
porcelain vases. I turned to my dad and asked: "Where are the freaks? You
said we were going to the Freak
Museum."

He looked down at me and
said, "The Frick. Not
‘freak.’"

And that sums up how I
feel about this show. It’s not what I wanted it to be. Where are the lesbians? Why
are we still here?

Len tells Juliet he likes
the direction things are going. So much so, he wants her to sign a
confidentiality agreement. Romance, thy name is Lenny.

Juliet: Yes, Len, I guess I could wrap
my head around signing a confidentiality agreement, as long as you’d sign one,
too. But we’re really getting ahead of ourselves, aren’t we?
Len: I don’t like to waste time. I’d
rather be direct.
Juliet: So would I. My relationship
with my ex-husband — we were less than honest with each other.
Len: Been there. Hope it didn’t put
you off monogamy.

Juliet is so hot in her
red dress, it prompts Len to buy even more shares of her company. Juliet
decides to tell the Man Who Has Everything he can’t have her. Oh sure, you can
buy her an Aston Martin and she’s over the moon. But own a piece of her company
and she gets all wiggy.

Real love — Mia and Jason are walking off dinner when he makes it
clear he’s sick of hearing about Wiley. Mia can’t help it because she’s smitten
with his doggie bad breath and the way he destroys her best shoes, but
otherwise completely ignores her.

This relationship says it
all about Mia.

Robot surgeon Jason doesn’t
get any of it. "The dog just sat there. He didn’t do anything!" he
says exasperatedly. He can’t understand falling for a dog she met three days
ago. Jason can’t understand falling for anything, not really.

 

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