“Candy Bar Girls” recap: Episode 6


DJ Jo is back and she’s still teaching.

Jo: I’ve just got in from school and it is still really good. Er, I love it, the kids are great.

Sarah: Well thank goodness because the cliffhanger in episode two over which profession she would choose has been playing on my mind.

It turns out that DJ Jo is now single. She has chosen her career as a schoolteacher over love. Because of course all teachers must be single till the day they die. She is also considering giving up DJing but the thought of actually doing it is making her all bum-clenchy.

She then reveals that she has one last big gig that she’s looking forward to. Of course this big gig turns out to be the press launch for the Candy Bar, because the entire universe obviously revolves around the Candy Bar. You’d think this show was just one massive advertising campaign for the Candy Bar. Ahem.

The next scene shows people putting the final touches to the Candy Bar ahead of the big launch. The press launch seems to require quite a lot of floor gluing and more building work, which makes us fear that the place has not actually been fit for all those cocktail classes and salsa nights over the past six weeks.

Gary arrives effing and blinding about stuff not being done on time. Seriously, Gary, you need a holiday mate. You need to go lie on a beach somewhere there are no pink towels, crappy cocktails or vaginas, and just chill the f–k out.

Gary decides that the bar needs a name change to keep its brand consistent with his other venues.

Lee: Considering that we’ve just watched a six week branding exercise for a bar called Candy Bar for the last six weeks, it definitely seems sensible to change the name on episode six

It seems that the bar will now be called Candy Ku Bar Girls.

Over in North London, Christina Novelli has borrowed the kitchen of the pub she works in to make the canapés for the press launch and is being helped by hairdresser Natalie.

Sarah: So Natalie and Christina are friends now, when did that happen?

Lee: Why are you questioning the editing of this show, you should know by now that there is no story arc at all.

Christina is making some sort of alcoholic chocolate shot and mini salmon and avocado bagels, while Natalie is just making a mess beside her. They have a bit of flirty banter over toasting bagels and Natalie’s first taste of salmon and generally they’re quite cute together. We think they should just take that chocolate sauce home and not bother going to the Candy Bar party.

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