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The battle wages on: Fake lesbians - liberated or lame?Australia's Hungry Beast is attempting to conquer a conundrum near-and-dear to anyone who's ever had an opinion about Katy Perry: Fake Lesbianism. In a two-minute video available on their site, actual gay Monique Schafter goes up against straight lady Veronica in a fisticuffs cage match about fauxmosexuality. The intro: "We all know there are only two types of lesbians — Katy 'I kissed a girl, and I liked it' Perry and real ones like Ruby Rose."
Monique's argument:
Veronica's argument:
This argument has been raging since before t.A.T.u., and as long as network Sweeps exist, there's no end it sight. The reason it seems impossible to answer the fauxmosexual question is because — well, what is the fauxmosexual question? Are fake lesbians annoying? Are they harmful? Do fake lesbians ruin lesbianism for real lesbians? Are fake lesbians a punch in the gut to the equality movement? Or has the equality movement been so successful that it is now socially acceptable to be a fake lesbian? Oh, and here's a question no one ever asks, but it's the one at the heart of the puzzle: who has the right to label another person as a "fake" lesbian? There are, of course, women like Katy Perry who confess to being straight and kissing other women to titillate their boyfriends — but for every Katy Perry, there's a Lindsay Lohan, who people refuse to acknowledge as legitimately queer until she's pleading on Twitter for Sam Ronson to marry her. (Hyperbole. LiLo has not proposed to SamRo on Twitter. I don't think.)
How does the lesbian community as a whole feel about fake lesbianism? The jury is still out. Plenty of lesbians I know will rail the day away about Katy Perry, but if you show them a photo of Drew Barrymore and Ellen Page kissing, they'll be rendered speechless with glee. As for me: I kiss girls. I actually do like it. And I'm only using my label-maker on myself. Here's the video, so you can see for yourself: What do you think about the Hungry Beast's take on fake lesbians? Submitted by on November 13, 2009 - 4:00pm. |
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News, Reviews & Commentary on Lesbian and Bisexual women in Entertainment and the Media
Honestly this is a touchy subject
This is a touchy suubject especially with prop 8 and everything that been going on
But all in all I think its good people are atleast being alittle more open to gays
though "Faux gay" can be a faux-pas and a marketing ploy, even if it gets them press it can also have bad publicity towards people who are against gays
So ya Katy Perry kissed a girl though shes straight, and even though were trying to prove that we love who we love kids do need to experiment, it helps them figure out who we are
And if you do have a problem with all this Fake-lesbian stuff that stop watching and reading about it
The world has enough problems so we should simply worry about our selfs and trying to send a good image instead of simply complaining about the bad image
Bisexuality trend
sex sells
no matter who's doing what with whom.
It's shameless, if not downright contemptible, but it seems as though all human experiences are fast becoming commodified.
That said, I'd like to see a non-straight couple in a Disney vacation commercial, or one for Campbell's soup. That would be liberating.
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The most beautiful smile is the one that struggles through tears--Graffiti on a bridge outside NYC
yup!
"That said, I'd like to see a non-straight couple in a Disney vacation commercial, or one for Campbell's soup. That would be liberating."
amen to that!
i agree
100%
"stop, you don't get to break my heart and comfort me too."
*well put*
yes, sex does sell, but so does crack cocaine, and that still doesn't make it good or acceptable..
progress
Progress is progress i think. I think about the way things were 15 years ago, about how we got the disclaimer on rosanne when 2 girls kissed and now we dont. I think if we stopped giving it the attention it would probably go away. All major actors and actresses have publisist, and alot of them do what the publisist recomend. I think about all the psuedo marriages that existed. Is it a cheap marketing ploy? Yes. Do i think it should stop? No. I guess the real question is do lesbians want any exposure or just good exposure?
I am a firm beleiver in the quote "kisses arent contracts"
Btw, I always wanted to get a shirt made when that stupid song came out that said "i kissed a girl way before katy perry did"
"stop, you don't get to break my heart and comfort me too."
I still don't quite know
this
if I were straight, would I care if two gays (a chick and a guy) were making out on TV? No
Do I care if two cute girls (supposedly straight) are making out on TV? No
The more kisses, the better
I would say Liberated
I would say Liberated, because visibility sometimes gives the chance to make a breakthrough concerning tough perspective on different forms of sexuality.
To SeekerSue: I so agree with U. I know the feeling & I'm tired of bisexuality never being mentioned too. As I've had the chance to point out before, sexuality is pretty fluid & this is not just my opinion.
So, what should we do to start scratching the surface? To all the bisexual ladies: It's time to rouse from sleep and bring this topic under consideration & discussion.
Any constructive suggestion?
The Only more annoying than a fake lesbian is....
it's not fine
It would be fine if they were doing it for reasons other than attention grabbing and to titillate men, but they are not, they are the ONLY reasons the majority of these celebs do this, some have been open about being Bi - Angelina, Drew etc however it's very interesting that these BI women end up married to men. How many bi women end up with long term female partners?Unless they identify as bi as a stepping stone to lesbianism then I can think of NONE.
So yep fauxmosexuals make me sick, give society a wrong idea about female sexuality.
Bummer
The Veronicas aren't gay?
Well, there goes my Austrailian three-some fantasy...
So the other week...
... it was my 21st birthday. And me and all my (predominately straight) friends were out at the dancing (in a very nasty, cheap, straight club. The Garage for anyone from Glasgow). We were probably 10/12 girls and 5ish boys - just out, getting drunk, having a dance. And there was this one random guy who kept trying to get with anyone of the girls, and just wouldn't leave us alone, and wouldn't get the message that none of my friends were interested in him. He only shuffled off when my friend Euan pointed at all the girls in the group and said "see all this? it's mine". So firstly I was pretty pissed at this guy for being a) a creep and b) only listening to the man in the group, and only backing off because the girls were already owned. Ugh.
But then, 10 minutes later, my girlfriend and I had broken off from everyone else and were having a bit of a cuddly dance and a lot of a drunk kiss. And all of a sudden, out the corner of my eye, I spot this guy - standing RIGHT beside us, STARING and gyrating and nodding and clapping. I was so freaked out and drunk, (and I'm not proud of this btw) that I slapped him. Hard. He got the message and we had the rest of the night in peace.
But it's the frequency with which you see straight girls kissing to titillate men which creates situations like this. It's not liberating - it's a way for stupid girls to get free drinks with none of the having to kiss the desperate idiots that are buying them. I was just so appalled that he assumed we were kissing for the benefit of his eyes. We are both a lot more reluctant to kiss in clubs these days.
I don't think we need to label our sexuality, or that of others. Anyone can absolutely kiss anyone they like, whenever they like - but when it's used as sexual ammunition it is degrading to everyone.
Wow, that got a little ranty and rambly. Sorry.
This!
Been there, wished I'd slapped the guy too (I merely told him to fuck off, but I think your way works best).
It's the fact that every guy now assumes two girls kissing in a club are for their benefit and not our own, the backlash of the 'drunk straight girl syndrome'. Nothing is more off-putting when sharing (sometimes even a brief) kiss to suddenly have manly, animalistic cheering to one side of you. Like you're porn they've downloaded or something!
Fine by me
Part Exploitation, Part Liberation
We all know that gender roles are oppressive to just about everyone, straight, gay, bisexual, transgender, female and yes even males.
Generations of LGBTs have built this subculture--fought, marched, rioted and sometimes died creating a safe place for LGBTs to express their trueselves. We liberated ourselves. It's not surprising that straight women and sometimes straight men want to share in that liberation.
The problem is when straight men and women forget that they have heterosexual privilege. They enjoy the fruits of our labor, our fight for liberation and our fight against oppression without fighting themselves.
That straight girls can make out without getting killed or arrested is thanks to LGBTs. They only do it now that it's safe for them to do so. But do they thank us? No. The congratulate themselves for being liberated when it was us who liberated them. And that is exploitation of our struggle.
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Tweet: @GrrrlRomeo
I'm sure you don't mean to generalize
"That straight girls can make out without getting killed or arrested is thanks to LGBTs. They only do it now that it's safe for them to do so. But do they thank us? No. The congratulate themselves for being liberated when it was us who liberated them. And that is exploitation of our struggle."
. . . but as a straight woman, I must chime in and say that I don't belong in your description.
I have found the love of my life in another woman, something I never thought could happen to me, although I have always been supportive of all forms of love.
Some would argue that I am at least bisexual but won't admit. I'm not interested in turning this discussion into that argument; suffice it to say I know that I'm straight.
I don't feel liberated; I am simply a woman in love with another woman, the rest of the world be damned. I can't identify with the struggle of non-straight people, although certainly I am sympathetic. I am truly heartbroken that my gay cousin and his boyfriend of almost years cannot legally be married and/or adopt children as they so desire (Florida). I have a friend who married her boyfriend of 10 years; however, they only wanted domestic partner benefits but couldn't get them without being married because they are a heterosexual couple, and almost didn't marry on the grounds that marriage isn't legal for everyone. And so on.
I understand what you are saying, and I agree that some straight women do exploit that two women kissing is seen as more acceptable by society overall. However, many of us, me included, are right there alongside you, wanting more than anything for you to be able to freely and peacefully pursue your own happiness with whomever you choose.
Some of us are not using the LGBT struggle as a springboard for our own bravado. In my case, I couldn't give a flying fuck if the entire rest of the world were heterosexual; I would still be just as passionately in love with this woman, and I wouldn't need an ounce of anyone else's blood, sweat, and tears to feel justified in acting on that love.
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The most beautiful smile is the one that struggles through tears--Graffiti on a bridge outside NYC
You Keep Holding Tight to that Privilege Then
No, I do think you belong in that description.
If it was not for, just for example, the Mattachine Society in the 50s or the Stonewall rioters in the 60s, you would not have the liberty to engage in a same-sex relationship without dire consequences regardless of what you identify as.
In fact, it's unlikely you ever would've acted on your feelings for another woman if it had not been for the generations of LGBTs that endured jailtime, electroshock therapy and forced sterilization in insane asylums.
That feeling you feel for another woman? That was once considered a mental illness. And LGBTs fought to have that feeling your feeling removed from the American Psychiatric Association's list of disorders in the 70s.
So thanks to us you're not clinically disordered.
The only reason you don't feel liberated is because you personally never had to do the liberating. But I assure you, if this was 1970--or worse 1950--your situation would be much different.
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Tweet: @GrrrlRomeo
yeah, I figured I'd get pissed on
Easier that way than to actually examine the details and admit there's room for learning something new, right? Jesus, you didn't even read my fucking post; if you had, you wouldn't have written your own, because I addressed everything beforehand.
Know this: gays aren't the only ones who are fighting for gay rights. They aren't the only ones who have gone to jail, been beaten up, and have had their lives threatened or taken in the name of gay rights.
Keep thinking of it as your struggle only, and you're never going to get anywhere. Indeed, I'm beginning to think that you resent that you don't get to claim sole ownership of the situation.
Are there any mature, forward-looking non-straight people on this thread?
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The most beautiful smile is the one that struggles through tears--Graffiti on a bridge outside NYC
by the way
GrlRomeo: "In fact, it's unlikely you ever would've acted on your feelings for another woman if blah blah blah"
I only said I was in love with a woman. I never said I acted on my feelings. Why? Because I haven't. So much for that "privilege" over which I'm supposed to be kissing your perpetually angry ass.
Here's a clue, Sparky: READ THE POSTS BEFORE YOU RESPOND.
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The most beautiful smile is the one that struggles through tears--Graffiti on a bridge outside NYC
I feel as though
you deserve some sort of award. In all seriousness.
~Lolita
"But to see her was to love her, love but her, and love forever."
Like a dude in a lesbian bar
I have no intention of sugar coating shit, walking on eggshells or doing any kind of politically correct faggot dance for straight people that may come to the site. You're on a site that caters to lesbian and bisexual women. If you don't like the gay people talking about "the gay" that's really not my problem.
Yes I am angry. I'm a pissed off raving militant dyke. You sure got me figured out.
By the way, non-straight isn't an identity. That's just saying what someone DOESN'T identify as. It's othering and insulting to queer people.
I don't think you understand what I mean by privilege. It's heterosexual privilege, not something I give you to you but something society gives to straight people. It's a privilege people lose when they identify as queer with the queer community.
The more LGBT people are liberated, the less privilege straight people have.
And another thing, I reread your post...and I don't know how the flying fuck I was supposed to assume that you hadn't acted on your feelings for this other woman who is apparently the "love your life."
Then why the fuck aren't you acting on it and how the fuck should I know that you aren't? Could you have been anymore misleading?
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Tweet: @GrrrlRomeo
The problem is when straight
The problem is when straight men and women forget that they have heterosexual privilege.
Thats because (some of them) don't even realise that they have it. There will be straight people, like my friends, who will be well aware that there are not equal rights for all gay people compared to that of straight people. But, knowing them and how they think, they wouldn't view their rights as a privilege because it just doesn't figure in their mindset as they don't need to think about it to the extent that we do.. as it doesn't directly affect them. Maybe straight people who have friends and relatives that are gay and coupled think about it abit more because it affects someone they know and care about... but otherwise, if they haven't, then they have no reason to think of us (unless they want to).. and will forget because they have nothing reminding them about our differences.. (other than if they think about it of the own accord).
And as seperate, its both lame and liberating (in both media and real life).
i think their are no rules
i think their are no rules and people should be able to express themselves however they want. obviously TONS of girls "pash" with other girls for guys attentions but if they want to who cares. whould people be saying the same thing if gay people were hooking up with people of hte opposite sex, i don't think so.
i think if it's not hurting you or offensive, let people go about doing what they want. it's wrong to do it just for the attention but what are we going to do, go up to these people and stop them from hooking up because its for the wrong reasons.
but two girls hooking up for attention does look bad in my opinion but if that makes them happy, do whatever you want.
I'll admit this is a problem
I'll admit this is a problem for me. I identify as straight and have never had romantic feelings towards another woman, but I am sexually attracted to women as well. I don't like having to assure people that its not fake and for that reason I would never kiss a woman in public, because people would label it as fake. I don't think thats fair, but what can you do.
by the same token if two straight men kissed in public no-one would tell them they were doing it for the attention, everyone would instantly assume they were gay. why the double standard?
i guess we should put girls who kiss other girls to impress their boyfriends at the same levels as we put girls who kiss other guys to make their boyfriends jealous, its not nice but its something that will happen and isn't really our business
thoughts
just throwing it out there, but heaps of my straight guy friends from college mack on each other to the point of challenge when under the influence. more so than girls macking on each other.
point being, most girls dont get turned on by this (that i know of). yes guys get turned on by girls kissing, but erm - its guys. they get turned on by things less hot than girls kissing every day. so it could be viewed that if you are trying to restrict girls 'pashing' for the sake of it so that guys dont get turned on, then you are fighting a losing battle. its more a patriachal thing than a true v faux homosexual thing. anyway, you're not going to be able to stop it. people are people and people are as tacky as they like, so if you cant beat 'em, join 'em. live and let love. :)
Drew Barrymore is hot.
not cool
sad, sad triangular desire... better than nothing, though
i like to
kiss girls. and i like to watch girls kissing. and i can totally understand girls who like to kiss girls, even if they are straight. so whats the problem?
oh i see, the publicity stunt thing. well, that's their problem/issue, not mine. honestly, the guys who would hit on me when kissing a girl (thinking i am just one of the promiscuous chicks pashing to tease them) would probably hit on me anyways. a simple "no thanks" usually clears the matter.
so kissing straight girls don't do any harm to me, but they do me a very certain favor: they make lesbian kisses MAINSTREAM. i like that. so go for it paris and drew and kate.
it's kinda lame..........
If a girl who is genuinely
If a girl who is genuinely straight but starts having feelings for a girl but still IDENTIFIES as straight, then it doesn't bother me so much. If a girl is genuinely bisexual and kisses a girl, then it doesn't bother me at all. If, however, a girl kisses another girl to get the attentions of a guy, then I get upset. They think its great, giggling whilst playing up with their girly friends for their boyfriends, but then they don't get 'dyke' called after them if they're holding their girlfriends hand down the street, or have some dickhead insist you snog your girlfriend in front of him for his kicks like you're some form of entertainment. I blame these girls for putting me in that situation far too many times.
Kiss if you must, but for the eye of a cute boy? Come girl, take a walk in my shoes, then tell me whether I should lighten up on the fact that we fought for the right to love, for them to just come in at the end to 'have a laugh.'
Celebrity publicity kisses I'm not sure on. I mean, I hate that it's still considered 'titillating' enough to cause a mild frenzy, and it does fall under the same category as above, but the more people see it the more people get bored of it. It becomes less taboo. That one's harder to call I think, but I'm still standing firm on the 'girl snogging for boy foreplay' thing.
Guess I'm the only one
Honestly, im not mad at
Honestly, im not mad at those who kiss girls for their boyfriends as long as they keep it between people who know they arent really homosexual. The only time i could see myself really getting offended would be if one of them hauled off and kissed me, and got me all "titillated"only to go to her bf and further his titillation. lol
If anything its just annoying, because they pretend to be what theyre not, and no one likes a poser.
Why are you trying to give me meds when ive Bengay?
I don't like it, because now
I don't like it, because now every man who finds out about my sexuality sees it as some sexual fantasy, as if I'm bisexual purely for his enjoyment. And that's offensive.
I think bisexuals have a hard enough time being taken seriously already, and straight girls messing around with other women for a man's attention certainly doesn't help any.
I'm loving this show too :)
sending mixed messages.
i have mixed feelings. i think because i want the best of every situation.
As much as i love watching straight girls make out and enjoying themselves doing such... especially those women we love (drew n E.P... yum!) and i LURRVVE Katy Perry, i see repercussions for our community.
The other night i was kissing my girlfriend late in the evening and on a quiet road when a car full of boys pulled up and actually enquired if we were in love or doing it for their benefit. Now, i know this was merely to get a rise out of us or as suggested- a show and tell... but i was severely pissed off. They actually hung around until we moved on... bastards.
Both my girlfriend and myself are young, tomboyish at heart, but quite femme.. so i guess we looked like typical, drunk straight girls... but that doesnt matter in the slightest... i think we do lose out when it becomes a straight trend to act les/bi. I hate feeling like i have to validate my relationship/status/sexuality... and this is still a problem even with my peers and workmates and my mum (as sad as it is).
I guess a happy medium would be if straight girls wanting to do this for attention, limited their behaviour/actions to myself :D (as long as i knew they were that way inclined beforehand)
Not only lame...
but actually has consequences for real lesbians and bisexuals. As numerous people have mentioned in this thread because of the whole straight girls snogging each other in pubs and clubs you now cant go to one of these places and kiss ya gf without men assuming its for them or without cheering and whooping to the side of ya! Tbh I dont go to many straight places, I dont see the point in going somewhere I dont fit in and wouldnt want to but the one time I have been recently for a straight friends birthday I kissed my gf and a bloke comes over right away to cheer us and ask for a threesome its ridiculous. I couldnt give a fig about straight girls feeling liberated and its wishful thinking if anyone here thinks they might do it as a one off cause they enjoy it, its merely a ploy to get drinks or attract men. When celebrities do it its a cry for publicity. However I would like to point out 1 thing, tatu are a slightly different case in that they came first and I know for a fact that the whole publicity surrounding all the things she said when it first came out from russia and the tatu forums and suchlike was actually beneficial, I made friends on there and met numerous teenagers who were given hope by their visability at the time.
~sarah
LAME
It's not just lame, it could hurt. These girls fuel the idea that being gay is to quote Kate McKinnon about "titties, and fun!" who wouldn't CHOOSE that? To them being gay is kissing another girl, they don't have to share the other experiences of being real gay and all the crap that comes with it. Like having to come out to your parents, or being afraid to hold hands with your girlfriend in public even though you really really want to.
On the Ellen-Drew kiss though, I liked it. Upond further inspection, I didn't mind it because in promoting a movie about roller derby, I think that kiss was for the girls. Doesn't make it right, but it does make it less degrading to women. And for me all those "Drew Barrimore is bi in real life" arguments out there will only be legit if she is in fact dating Ellen Page, or playing a role in a movie where she's in love with Ellen Page. Otherwise, it's still a pose just meant to be a crowd pleaser.
torn on the issue but
generally faux lesbians annoy me. Not because of what they do because I see nothing wrong with it if a girl wants to kiss another girl, I think that's a perfectly natural feeling for a lot of women these days. What annoys me is if they don't realise the struggle that gay people have everyday to be accepted - because they don't have to go home and come out to their family and friends.
I have one very hetero friend who, while she would never sleep with a girl, will often kiss them, but I know she's well aware of the issues that I've had and is supportive of the gay community as a whole, so i see nothing wrong with it. But then I've seen other girls who are purely doing it for the sexual attention of some sleezy dude (because let's face it, you aren't going to find the attention of a quality bloke that way..) and to me that's just shameless and degrading for the girls involved and insensitive to lesbian couples who have to deal with being leered at nearly every time they are affectionate in public.
In some ways it's what we've been fighting for, in others it abusive misuse of our hard earned liberation.
Not our place to decide
StuntDouble, I'm with you on this. It's not our job to decide whether someone is a "fake" lesbian or not. Plus, women don't need to be knocking down other women, especially other possibly queer women.
Plus, my lesbian and gay men friends make out with each other all the time for fun. Blurring the lines is just more fun. Holding up those specifics (real lesbians are this... real women are this...)are just too tiring.
(Also, I couldn't bring myself to read all the comments at the Au site... but saw a couple of people saying "I don't know why I'm okay with girls kissing but not two guys." Maybe they'll do some thinking through their homophobia. good.)
Reminds me of my gf
This reminds so much of a conversation I had with my grilfriend about Katy Perry. I said I hated everything about that stupid song except the lyrics. (The music so bubbly and catchy) Then my gf said she hated everything about the lyircs. She is bisexual so she didn't see it from a lesbian point of view and how cheap the stupid little storyline was. I thought it was so annoying.
So, yes, if I had to say something about fake lesbians. It's annoying. Usually it is really hot, but if there are guys around whooping, it just makes me feel sick.
reading this again
reminds me of that clip from infomainia on current.
check it out
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0tHppucxMrM"stop, you don't get to break my heart and comfort me too."
Give me a fake lesbian any day
over a real - or even half-baked - biphobic gay (or straight) twerp.
NB: Katy sings: "I kissed a girl and I liked it"
She doesn't sing: "I kissed a girl coz my boyfriend likes it"
Katy Perry = liberated
Biphobia = lame
Hmm, but she DOES sing:
Hmm, but she DOES sing: "Hope my boyfriend don't mind it" and "I got so brave, drink in hand" not to mention "No I don't even know your name, it doesn't matter. You're my experimental game"
How sincere, romantic, genuine, honest, loving, and liberating
Katy Perry = drunk chick with 4 jäger bombs down, and two tequila shots to go... can't pay, find pretty girl, make out, boy pay for my drinks... SO liberated
Biphobia IS lame, but this is not it
Well exactly..
Katy liked it - hopes BF won't mind it.
And where does she sing about not paying for her own drinks?
" How sincere, romantic, genuine, honest, loving, and liberating " How is she being dishonest? Why assume the girl she kissed is anymore queer than Katy is and might therefore be emotionally hurt by her?
Sure, some bi-curious girls do lead queer girls on - but a lot of girls who snog girls in bars and clubs absolutely would not do it with a girl that they knew was gay or really bi.
What's wrong with writing and singing a song about the behaviour of " bi-curious" - " bi-above-the-waist " - " a bit bi after a couple of drinks " - type girls? It's social observation of quite common real human behaviour. It's not even saying it's a good thing - or a bad thing. Why would an lgbtq person wish to censor or censure such social observation in the form of a pop song?
I like Katy Perry because she outrages the homophobic christian right with her songs: http://www.e-t-youth.com/index.php?p=1_54
And as I see it some lgbtq people just don't get it and are ridiculously uptight about her.
Good on the Dinah for giving her a gig.
PS: Monique Schafter is very biphobic in her attitudes as far as I'm concerned. The sort of person who assumes all the women who do girl-girl in Hustler magazine and their video productions are straight. When it's wrong to make such assumptions and is actually absolutely not the case anyway. Believe me I know.
Yes... exactly
Ok so let me get one thing out of the way, Believe you? You know?! WHooo High five! haha, Hustler girls aren't my type but I have a few friends who'd be pretty jealous of you ;)
Ok so hoping her boyfriend doesn't mind it is exactly, and precisely how she is being dishonest... It implies that he doesn't know the kiss went down, and she's not sure how he'll react if/when he finds out... that's pretty dishonest. It perpetuates the bad rep us bi girls have. And I'm not a cheater, and yes I do consider kissing a girl while dating ANYONE cheating (or kissing a boy) and I also consider cheating dishonest behavior. And I do not find this behavior liberating.
Whether the girl she kisses is queer or not, well not even Katy seems to care huh? I mean you're right I can't assume she is, but it wouldn't matter to Katy anyway, she's just playing with her, so if she's not, cool, now they both got some attention, but if she is, and you can't assume she's not either, then that's just mean isn't it? Not caring in the first place is mean. She doesn't even care to know her name.
And I'm all for freedom of expression and Katy can sing any song she pleases, but I don't have to like it. And I can say I don't like it and I can be against the crap she sings about because I think it hurts the community more than it helps bi-curious or even bisexual girls figure their shit out.
And don't get me wrong, I'm not against straight girls/bi curious girls exploring those feelings. I've made out with a bunch of my straight friends and you know, no one got hurt in the process. But even then, those kisses were real expressions of affection towards each other. Even though we were all sort of testing the waters (and I'm the only one who jumped in with a cannon ball =)) it was genuine and sincere and no third party was involved (no boyfriends... no spectators).
I know girls make out in clubs and bars... and it's pretty clear they do that for attention, not for sincerely expressing or even exploring their own emotions. And in the media, with Katy and any other representations of a girl on girl kiss, sex, whatever... it's done with some guy, or to get some guy, or to please some guy (Gossip Girl?) I've had such a hard time explaining to my mom that being Bi isn't about a threesome, isn't about having a boyfriend AND a girl friend, isn't about not being able to make up my mind, isn't about being greedy, isn't about not knowing what I want in a partner, isn't about pleasing my boyfriend by making out with a girl in front of him and songs and BS like this just vomits it all back in my face and says, yeah that's pretty much what we think it's all about. How is it liberating?
I just have a hard time understanding how this behavior isn't offensive to you as a Bi woman... it's offensive to me! I think it gives the message that the only time that it's okay to kiss girls (to explore those feelings) is when you're drunk at a bar and/or in front of some guy, and at the expense of someone's emotions--maybe.. if anyone cares... to get attention, for sweeps, to raise an eyebrow, to offend or outrage the homophobic christian right wing.
By the way, I offend the homophobic christian right all the time... privately... I mean it doesn't get on the internet but ... lol... but that's not the point is it? I mean, I'm atheist so I tend to not really give a crap what the homophobic christian right thinks... EXCEPT when they start to freak out about homosexuality (or bisexuality or bi curiosity, or transgendered people, or people who are genderqueer etc) because, whether I like it or not they're some sort of CRAP majority who are in charge or making decisions and voting on issues that affect the LGBTQ community so, really... it doesn't really help me to piss them off, to outrage them to freak them out. It would help me more to have them see that there are people who are loving, and committed to each other, who are honest, sincere, outstanding members of society, who are kind, and aren't sick in the head, who aren't sinners. (and who also aren't cartoons of themselves and this goes into playing up the stereotypes to have heterosexuals feel more comfortable in the presence of a queer person by easily identifying and mocking their stereotypical behavior --effeminate men in the media) I want the homophobic christian right to start embracing us because many of us belong to families who are homophobic christians (or homophobic instert your religion of choice) and those people don't want to just be rebellious teenagers pissing off their families, they want their families to love them unconditionally, they want them to love them for who they are and that includes their sexuality. So, again, here pissing them off isn't liberating anyone. It's probably actually keeping more people closeted.
My vote's still for Lame
I don't understand why so
I don't understand why so much stock is put into labels. "You kissed a girl. You're a lesbian' "You kissed a boy. You're straight" "You milked a cow. You're a farmer." Who cares. Labels are judgments, assumptions. Who are we to go around sticking tags onto other peoples backs. I can call you a mini-van. Doesn't mean that's what/who you are. If I want to kiss a girl, then I'm kissing a girl. If I want to take her out to dinner and buy her a pony, that's nobodies business but my own.
We can't have a baby in the house! My sister's coming
Does she eat them?
as i read
these post all seem to not care as long as its 2 hot chicks kissing. i dont thing much would be said if it was 2 ugly chicks kissing.
"stop, you don't get to break my heart and comfort me too."
I think its Uber lame