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News, Reviews & Commentary on Lesbian and Bisexual women in Entertainment and the Media

Olympian softball player Lauren Lappin talks about being out in professional sports

Pat Griffin, director of It Takes a Team!, recently interviewed out USA softball player Lauren Lappin for the Women's Sports Foundation. In the interview, Lappin talks about her experiences as an openly gay athlete in the 2008 Beijing Olympics, about coming out to her teammates and family, and about the growing acceptance of lesbians in bisexuals in the world of elite sports.

On coming out to her family:

I had my own inner struggle coming to terms with being gay, and I was lucky to have had the support of my family during such a difficult time personally. I was most worried about coming out to my parents, especially my father. He is a high school baseball and football coach and is fairly well-known in our community. He started coaching me when I was 11. We have a very close bond because of sports, and I look up to him so much. It was hard to come out to him because I wasn’t sure how he would take it and I didn’t want to disappoint him.

On coming out to her teammates:

With my teammates it was a process. I had teammates I was close to and I could lean on who I felt comfortable talking to. I came out to them first, and as I grew into it and had more self-acceptance, I came out to individuals in casual conversations. I didn’t want to make it a bigger deal than it was. I didn’t want to put people on the spot, but I wanted to give them a chance to ask questions if they had them. I started telling people and talking about who I was dating. Some teammates were great, some were surprised. Some were like “Oh, OK. No big deal.” I started with people I was close to and went from there. My teammates were very accepting. They have really supported and empowered me to accept myself and not hide who I am.

On how being openly gay effected her athletic performance:

Once I was comfortable with my sexuality, I came out to friends and teammates at Stanford that I was dating a woman. Once I came out, I was so much more comfortable within my relationships with my family and friends. Because I felt like I could finally be myself in every aspect of my life, I started to train better and play better ... I was a bubble player before, never having a solidified spot on the team. Coming into my own and accepting my sexuality allowed me to focus on becoming a better athlete and person and build stronger relationships with my teammates. Essentially, the experience of coming out has helped enable me to grow as a player and to fulfill my dreams this year.

Advice for other gay or lesbian athletes:

The most important thing is be proud of who you are. It’s not wrong to be gay, even though mainstream society tells us so. It’s who you are. I love that I’ve figured out who I am. I love being a gay athlete.

The interview is heartfelt and inspiring. You can read it in its entirety on the Women's Sports Foundation's site. Lappin's candid answers about her own personal journey toward being an out athlete, and the acceptance lesbians are receiving in the world of elite softball today, are really encouraging — especially if you, like me, were a gay athlete on a college sports team where homophobia was still surprisingly prevalent.

Lappin's interview gives me hope for the future of lesbian and bisexual athletes from the little leagues to the pros.

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  • lisaR's picture

    awesome

    Thats just great, what a fantastic role model, if her being so out and proud and successful just helps one gay kid come to terms with their sexuality it would be worth any worry.  Hopefully more will follow.

     

     

    Dru_Breezy's picture

    Um I think i'm in love. Now

    Um I think i'm in love. Now if Jenny Finch will come out from under the closet watch, I can die happy.

     

    I love softball players.

    Lunakiss's picture

    Coming Out In Sports

    www.myspace.com/lunakiss7.com

    I still don't understand why it is so taboo. Coming out in all Sports needs to be talked about more. I'm glad Lappin is comfortable enough to discuss it openly. I wonder when female bodybuilders and fitness models will come out?

      This picture is actress Paula Patton, the R&B/Soul RobinThicke's wife. She played in Deja Vu,Idelwild and Rush Hour 3. So it's not me.

    junglequeen's picture

    I just read the entire

    I just read the entire interview (at work...oops).

    This made me so happy. Lappin sounds like a great role model!

    Sarah from Chicago's picture

    great interview!

    As someone who is a gay athlete I think it's wonderful the things that Lappin says, and I do wish more athletes had the courage to be open about their sexualities.

    I think she embodies the ideal of a role model.

    *************************** 

    http://kiwi-grrl.livejournal.com/

    Meghan's picture

    Good timing...

    This article couldn't have come at better time for me. I just came out to my lacrosse coach yesterday, which was extremely hard because I have so much respect for my coach and I wasn't sure how she would react. She was very supportive though and I'm so thankful I have her as a coach. Now I'm in the process of telling my team, but like Lappin I don't want to make it a big deal.

    I'm so glad other gay athletes such as myself have amazing role models like Lappin who can lead by example and give us hope.

     

    I will not stop.
    I will not slow down.
    I will not surrender.
    I will win.
    I will triumph.
    I will never ever quit.

    nocturnal's picture

    Yay. Thanks.

    Oh that was awesome.

    iknow11's picture

    Crushing

    I have been crushing on Lauren Lappin for the longest time.  I read the whole interview and thought it was great. She is a great role model for young atheletes.

    Also, if anyone is interested The World Cup of Softball is from July 16 - 20 and as far as I know Lappin will be participating. It will probably air on ESPN although there is no word yet.

    Hannah's picture

    That's just great.

    That's just great.

    Explains to me why I love softball players.....=D

    Laura's picture

    woohoo!

    This news made my day 453454 better... whenever I hear about people coming out it brightens up my day. Even my straight friends get happier to hear news of people coming out.

     

    =)

    SpecialK7's picture

    Thanks

    for the interview.  It's funny because about a third of my college softball team dated girls and a few more are out since graduation (including me), but it was never really a big deal at school.  Three different times we had teammates dating each other (which I'm sure is not uncommon).
    Samsara Interrupted's picture

    I'll say!

    Re:

    "growing acceptance of lesbians in bisexuals"

    Lesbians in bisexuals = sharing the love and building queer solidarity.  ;)

    captainlex's picture

    .

    Softballers represent B)

     

    annnd that was my gangster-ish moment of the year. I'll return to being a geeky Italo-American now.

    Kelly's picture

    College Athletics and Coming out

    I played lacrosse in college, and my team was very homophobic.  I would never have felt comfortable coming out to my team.  It's like they were afraid that if there is someone gay on the team that other people will think that they are gay.  I just remember my closetedness and fear of being outed solidified when another girl on the team, who transfered in, was suspected of being gay and had her room searched for "proof" when she was away for the weekend.  It was so degrading, seeing my teammates parading around with her personal letters and photographs, their "proof"  I knew that I would never feel comfortable coming out to them after that.  Even after all that though, my teammates are my family, and I'm too afraid of losing that, of not being just another one of the girls anymore, feeling separate.  The girl that was suspected of being gay was ostracized.  She didnt even know why, I don't think she ever knew what they did.
    archergirl78's picture

    Reaction on College Athletics and Coming out

    First of all I don't know what it's like in college where you live (I'm from the Netherlands), but I do have a question of you playing with people who treat gay people that bad. Why would you even want to play with people who disrespect your own sexuality in such a degrading way? I would really think that YOU as a person deserve much more respect then any of them are giving you. Maybe it's because there are no other teams or maybe it's because you are insecure with being gay, but Kelly of the bottom of my heart: YOU ARE WORTH IT to be treated with respect. I'm not judging you or the choice you made, but I do hope that you can live your life with  respect and be proud of who you are. 

    Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind

    mixtape218's picture

    i'm not gonna say that I

    i'm not gonna say that I called it, but for real, i knew it! she's so cute!
    Damaris's picture

    She

    She is such a great role model and not to mention cuteeee