"What Is Sexy?" — a secret I wish they'd keptI don't frequent Victoria's Secret stores. I don't watch those lame Victoria's Secret TV specials. I don't peruse the Victoria's Secret catalog and never have, not even when one of my college friends insisted it was the perfect study break. So, fine; I didn't really expect to like the 2008 What Is Sexy? list, which was released by Victoria's Secret earlier today. But nor did I expect to be thoroughly confused by it. You've probably seen headlines about the most ridiculous one: Ryan Seacrest made the list for "sexiest smile." Ryan Seacrest? I think they must have accidentally copied and pasted from their What Is Icky? list. But let's talk about the women on the list, starting with the one that really made me say "Whaaaaat?" in a Jill Bennett–esque way: Sexiest Mom: Victoria Beckham
Uh. Did they mean Sexiest Person You Always Forget Is a Mom, Because, Really, Since When Can Mannequins Reproduce? I can think of many better candidates. Salma Hayek, for one.
Sexiest Actress: Eva Mendes
I think I must be misreading that. It does say actress, right? As in, one who can act? Yes, I'm being harsh, but I don't think people generally focus on her acting ability. No need to pretend this is the kind of sexiness that's derived from talent rather than titillation. Sexiest Eyes: Kate Bosworth
It's hard to believe that one blue eye and one hazel eye could be unimpressive, but I find Bosworth's gaze very empty. I like eyes that sparkle with intelligence, like America Ferrera's or Elizabeth Mitchell's.
Sexiest Legs: Ali Larter Amy Smart and Ali Larter Legs? I guess. She's sexier when she's killing zombies in Resident Evil: Extinction.
Sexiest Lips: Jessica Biel
Nah. Arms, maybe; lips, no. For lips (and arms, for that matter), I have to go with Jennifer Beals. Similar name, but oh, what a difference a few letters make.
Sexiest Couple: Fergie and Josh Duhamel
I can't see any kind of chemistry between these two at all. Not even if they were hanging out in a lab with beakers and Bunsen burners. And anyway, everyone knows this should be Alice and Dana. Sexiest Newlyweds: Katherine Heigl and Josh Kelley
I give up. They should have called this list Who's So Dull, They're Invisible? And now for the two I actually agree with — or at least can understand without partaking of an illegal substance. Sexiest Musician: Rihanna
Sexiest Style: Scarlett Johansson
The men on the list are even more mind-boggling to me — and they make me feel gayer. Dane Cook, Eric Bana and Josh Holloway all made the list. (Dane Cook was voted Sexiest Funnyman, which not only repels me but but also makes me wonder why is there no Sexiest Funnywoman. But then again, a lot of funny women are lesbians, and we couldn't have that.) Read the full list here. Oh, and one more: The cast of Dirty Sexy Money was named Sexiest Cast. I think I would have gone with Ugly Betty on that one (because, again, funny is sexy), but at least there's a transgender character on Dirty Sexy Money. Without that, this is, above all, the straightest list ever.
The accompanying What Is Sexy? TV special will air Feb. 9 on E! — oh, now we see the Seacrest connection (he hosts E! News). Most of the footage for the special will no doubt come from the company's Valentine's Day bash in Arizona this Saturday, aka Super Bowl Eve. Victoria's Secret and football? Color me comatose. Submitted by on January 30, 2008 - 7:12pm. |
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ohh
Jennifer Beals
ugh
and everything disturbingabout her eyes and her overall facial expression. I agree, Elizabeth Mitchell and America Ferrera are far better candidates for that title!Blake Lively
Blake Lively rocks my
Blake Lively rocks my world!
SHE is very beautiful and tall. I have no idea if she's good in other ways, but her Gossip Girl character is really.. good. yum.
wait...
if I remember correctly, Blake Lively is the girl from The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants, right???
If she is, I agree, she's totally hot!!
Blake Lively also happens to be...
the glass is half full!
Instead of highlighting the negative aspects of this highly opinionated list, let's stay positive! All women are beautiful, in the end, aren't they? ^_^ And there's some cuties on the list! These categories are just an excuse to show off MORE and more hot women.
Besides, if I hadn't already planned for my sign I'm gonna be holding up at the Spice Girls concert to read "Melanie C, don't let me go," you can bet it'd say "POSH = MILF!" ^_~ Hee hee.
what - no Shannyn Sossaman?
She is, IMO, the sexiest newcomer! (though I can understand choosing Blake Lively - she's better known from Gossip Girl nowadays).
And if you twisted my arm and made me pick the sexiest man, I'd go with Alex O'Loughlin from Moonlight. What? at least he gets to cry a lot on the show!
Victoria Beckham? Not again -_-
Some corrections
I think Romola Garai needs to be on there for something, probably best lips or eyes.
And Marion Cotillard could definitely be a contender for best eyes, as well.
As for best legs...Gina Carano :)
gina
Heh
Crush!
Oh yes please!
I think Gina could crack my head open with her thighs *drools*
and...
I think I'd let her do so :p
I know!
Alice and Dana! Swoon!
Alice and Dana! Swoon! Speaking of Alice, I think Leisha Hailey has gorgeous eyes.
But hey! At least Tila Tequila isn't on their List of Bad Judgement.
Blake
Salma Hayek is one of my
this water-filled list is definitely padded!
right on, scribegrrrl, i agree 100% double d.
Differences...
Interesting, what those 'powers that be' who makes these lists think are sexy, and what we do. I agree with you on this one Scribe, altho I am partial to all things Ali Larter.
Eyes, you want eyes? How about....Renee O'Connor??
I agree with a lot of your choices, including Jennifer B., Salma and America.
Best line: "Since when can mannequins reproduce"
:O
That's the sexiest pic I've seen of Renee O_O
*saves it*
She should have won the Best Eyes XD
What about Keira Knightley?
See, I'd've put Keira Knightley for lips. I know she's a stick and a lot of people disagree about her acting ability (I argue that the splendid dykiness of Bend It Like Beckham alone deserves our eternal love) but whatever other faults she may have the woman has truly beautiful lips.
--
No boom today. Boom tomorrow. There's always boom tomorrow.
--Susan Ivanova tells it like it is
Did you know...
yeah, I read that!
Explained why the girls had raging chemistry and the het pairing was painfully unconvincing. (Though I remember when I Googled it I think the only source I found was here on AfterEllen, so my inner scientist must be slightly suspicious.)
--
No boom today. Boom tomorrow. There's always boom tomorrow.
--Susan Ivanova tells it like it is
I know I read it first
Blake Lively...very sexy
But I'm not looking at women that young...really...
But you can right here.
You Know, I Don't Think...
This.
"Thus, for them "sexy" is seperate from sex- it becomes a catch-all phrase that seems to mean "pretty/fun/desirable/hip/popular/expensive/cute/appealing"
and all the rest is very very interesting. You are so right. I'd never thought about like that before. Thank you.
I don't think it's fair to
I don't think it's fair to say that most straight women don't have a real understanding of what sexy is when what is considered sexy is subjective. Even what society makes standard to be sexy does not mean it's something the majority will follow to a T. I mean, what is sexy? It obviously means something very different to you than what the people of Victoria Secret feel. And I'm guessing that you are going by your own definition of what is sexy. For straight women, much of their motivation for being sexy is to attract someone (men) and I don't think this makes their ideals of sexiness any less valid than anyone elses. I think you made a very good point about our own ideas of sex appeal not fully developing until we know our sexual selves.
Now, I personally do not find most of these choices sexy but I think these women were chosen moreso because of their growing popularity and the fact that they are not hideous (lol, generally speaking). Quite frankly, I think they're boring, but then again, they're not the typical women I find myself generally attracted to.
A sexy list is hard to do...
It's hard to define what is sexy. Everyone has different tastes. Like some women here like Blake lively, I can't stand her. We all have different tastes.
"Life is either a daring adventure or nothing."-Helen Keller
True
Yep... couldn't agree more!!
It's very hard to make a universal list of what's sexy and please everybody...
Dumbest List Ever
And Also, Since Everyone Seems to forget about her...
Quite.
i would have put Kate
i would have put Kate Winslet in the Sexiest Eyes category....and Sexiest Actress for that matter.
"Life's too short to be cool" -Shirley Manson-
www.myspace.com/grbgfreak1
Best Lips, FOR SURE....
It has to be Rachel Weisz! (you know, from the Mummy)
I just can't describe how much I loved watching her speak during that movie when I was in high school and saw it in the theaters. *sigh*
Blake Lively -- oops
You know who I was thinking of? Blake LEWIS!
You have to agree with me on that one. He's very unsexy. :)
And you have to agree that I should never multi-task, because this is what happens. :-/ Anyway, I've deleted my foolish mistake. Thanks for the corrections!
Eva Mendes
Yes, we could rail...
...at the choices on this list (like Jessica Biel's lips, which actually scare the bejesus out of me (lips shouldn't be that wide), or Fergie and Whatisface, who look like they bought each other matching sheens of sweat for their last anniversary in that picture.)
But let's take a moment to reflect that the list actually succeeds where it counts.
It truly captures Victoria's Secret's aesthetic. Tacky over tasteful, cheap over quality, flash in the pan over timeless elegance: anyone who's tried to buy a well made bra there will recognize that VS don't just applaud these principles: it embodies them.
Congratulations
You've somehow found the only picture I've ever seen where Scarlet Johannson actually looks hot. I get it now.
Also, Katherine Heigl, dull? Really? I love her. She's great on Grey's and her and TR Knight's friendship makes me all happy inside. She's about the only thing on this list I do agree with.
Seconding the votes for Rachel Weisz and Kate Winslet from somewhere above. But as others have pointed out, this list isn't actually about sexy at all. Or at least, not sexy as I understand it.
I think we should all approach Victoria's Secret with the same attitude as Gretchen Wilson: Victoria's Secret? Well their stuff's real nice. But I can get the same damn thing on a Walmart shelf half price. Because, you can. It certainly isn't any better quality or any prettier than stuff I've seen in bargain bins. And their taste in celebrities isn't exactly helping their cause.
Victoria Beckham???
In recent years (ie since 1995) she's reminded me of one of those wooden birds that you sit on the edge of a bowl and they swing up and down pecking aimlessly at the water.
Hey, I've just had an idea, Scribe. After Ellen should have a poll and ask its readers to nominate the 100 sexiest women. I'm pretty sure you'll get a few hits and lots of messages on the site. Then one of you just has to stay up all night counting them and we can argue for weeks over why we all disagree with who we voted for.
Love Pussy xx
*snort*
thank you.
It's worth mentioning...
...that the transgendered character in Dirty Sexy Money (Carmelita) is not only a transexual woman, but is played by Candis Cayne who is a very good looking transexual actress :)
Her voice is digitally lowered for the role she plays, as a mistress to William Baldwin's married character, but the character seems fairly positive despite those facts.
The actress identifies as a straight woman, from what I can tell, but I am still suprised there is an interview with her on AfterElton.com but no mention of her here: I know it's not the focus of the site, but thank you anyhow scribegrrrl, for bringing it up :)
The list is pretty lame, I have to agree :/
I believe..
Musician
Don't you have to play an intrument to qualify as a MUSICIAN?
Granted I know shit about this Rhianna person but to the little bit of my knowledge she ain't no musician. That being said, the sexiest musician is....
JAMIE BLAKE!
Do you? Why? I thought
Do you? Why? I thought all you had to do to be a musician is make music.
What does Aretha Franklin do for a living, if she isn't a musician?
harsh..
Jessica, Bana
Eric Bana is sexy. But the other dudes? Nah. Jessica Biel is lovely. This article gets 1 star.
Jessica, Bana
Eric Bana is sexy. But the other dudes? Nah. Jessica Biel is lovely. This article gets 1 star.
Agreed!