What's YOUR Problem? Episode 6

ohhh i've been waiting all day for this vlog... }}I think I'm the first postng a comment.. yahoo...

I just about spit my own water when I saw Cathy spit her drink.

Way to go Mr. G.

...he'd be Cathy DeBuono. Your bracelet is perfect for you!!

And LOL the gag bit at the end of the song was hilarious! 
Thank you for another entertaining and informative vlog.

And damn you are sexy.  I'm jealous that Mave got to kiss your
lips. Then she rubbed salt in the wound by telling us how soft they are!!!

Oh but a girl can dream.  Already Can't wait until next week!

You shouldn't have to move across the world to be yourself. But if you hide yourself for the sake of others then you'll never be happy.

Take baby steps, if you live with your parents, find a roommate and move out.
If your going to college, choose to live "On Campus". If you absolutely can't move even to another town, then find a local community, they exist everywhere, theres Power in Numbers.

I haven't even watched yet, but I can't tell you the size of the smile that crossed my face when I saw that Cathy's guest this week is Maeve!

Woot!

"Whatever people consider to be normal, it never is." -Ashley Davies

and this vlog. South has covered a lot of the issues that are addressed in this vlog, and that makes me even happier about the show. South of Nowhere has a strength that other shows dealing with lgbtq issues don't in it's mostly realistic portrayal of the struggle to know yourself when you realize you're gay.

And Maeve's character evolution as Paula Carlin has been extraordinary and lovely to watch. Some of it was hard to watch, too, but that's because life is tough. You rock, Maeve!

Thanks for a great session, Cathy!

 cathy you rock and you always have great guest and lets not forget how hot your guest are so being able to watch 2 sexy women for half hour is great.

i get to laugh and have serious moments 

thanks cathy

rock on

Melissa M.

First she makes out with Jill and now she's kissing Cathy.* sighs* Lucky ho bag. I'm totally kidding *mumbles* Noo I'm nooot. :o)~

This vlog was excellent! All your guest are amazing and your advice is solid. I question everything that I hear except your advice. You know why? Because it makes sense. It's shit I've been thinking about and hearing for years. I'm so glad, someone other then myself, is saying it.

At 5'8 (with shoes on), I've always had weird problem with people shorter then me. I have no problem with actual little people but anyone above the cut off point to be declare an actual little person, weirds me out. I consider myself to be a top/dom so you would think I wouldn't mind someone who was shorter then me but I do. Anyone below 5'3 and above 4'10 is not attractive to me. I'm still confused about the why.

Wonderful vlog Debuono.

I totally get why you're angry. So there with ya ;)

Not being able to get out sucks. having to stay closeted is the worst thing ever.....

who the hell is Alex Guiness? Seriously?? come on Cathy.... :P

THE UNOFFICIAL JILL BENNETT FANCLUB WEBPAGE
http://www.freewebs.com/ujbfc

This vlog suits you and you're doing a great job, keep it up :-)  And Maeve is just great too :-D

"Be who you are and say what you want because those who matter don't mind and those who mind don't matter" Dr.Seuss

I think the advice you gave the first girl was great, if you can't be out to the people around you the internet is a good first step towards being more open about who you are. And Cyprus is an island of about 826 000 inhabitants (I looked it up) so obviously there are more gay people on the island and a lot of them probably have the same problem of not being able to be out. So I think starting a community online might be a brilliant idea.

Anyways, the vlog was great as usual with lots of insightful advice. Although "what is Alec Guiness?", come on Cathy that was a joke right?

So thank you for this week's insight and entertainment, now I'll just start the countdown until next week...

Cathy, but I'm willing to devote several long hours of thought to that very subject.

This week I was afraid for your life due to the fact that Maeve's dog is surely part dinosaur. "He can gobble Cathy up in one bite," I thought to myself and then I felt envious. Never mind Gus, his name should be Ginormous Rex.

This week I was also inspired by your words (the living life like it's a mission part). Thanks Cathy! You make therapy fun!

All artists, if they are to survive, are forced, at last, to tell the whole story.

James Baldwin

I like big dogs. He looks like a sweet heart and now I want to call him Gus cause I Mr. Guiness is too much.

It is funny to watch all the flirting mixed with good advice.

Cathy I did not know you were that tall. I dont know about that height thing though. I dont do short either. I am 5 8 but maybe if the person was great then it would not matter.

Maeve, you were referring to your interview on Playboy radio, right? The question wasn't "What is ribbing?"  The question was "What is Tribbing?".  And you did get it right, although I wouldn't necessarily say dry humping.

 The full word is Tribadism.  You can check out the Wiki page here:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tribadism

Well I'm not an expert on Cyprus, maybe it's different in different parts of the island but I was there last summer with a whole group of gay girls and I met a bunch of lesbians from there. Could be that we were so obvioulsy gay that they weren't afraid to "make contact" but I do know there are other lesbians in Cyprus. Hope it works out!

And I also have to say that I loved the vlog. It is really awesome that we can watch a entertaining vlog that at the same time is so inspirational and helpful. The subject today made me realise even more how lucky I am to have such accepting family/friends etc and live in a country and city where it's so easy being out (Stockhom, Sweden). So thank you Cathy! And Maeve to of course!

this was such a sweet vlog with so much good advice and good ideas, esp about parental relations and their fears and how to handle them... awesome! K.I.S.S. is a great acronym. :)

omg, inbd

i think we could all easily adapt the K.I.S.S. strategy if it always ended with a Cathy smooch :D How about a prescription for that doc? lol 

 <3 thanks so much for the meaningful messages mixed with fun times. also i absolutely love your idea of creating a website localized for different lesbian communities. and its so nice how you take each of your letters to heart. you truly are AH-MAZING

he def is a ham and knows how to get in the middle of things...3 way indeed!!! Cathy seeing you spit out your wine was priceless...go mama kitty;) I know there was a lot of fun, but the subject matter was serious and I think you gave  out good advice....especially about being careful. Maeve was beautiful,funny and open. Great vlog!

just wondering Maeve.....how do you get from S&M to Church???....just sayin'

Gus is named after sir Alec Guiness... Cool...

Personally, I'm not hung up on heights (I'm 5'3") but I know some who are. Thank you Maeve for that smart comment; I am making up for it :p And the bra strap snapping by Maeve so reminded me of me back in junior high. Heh. 

What can I say? Another great vlog episode. Thank you.

_ _ _ _ _

"Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind." (Dr. Seuss)

I'm sure great numbers of Star Wars geeks gasped right along with me ... that question probably caused a major disturbance in the force (yes, I know he played dozens of roles more challeniging than that one, but he'll always be Ben Kenobi to me).

I was so happy when I saw that Maeve was on you vlog, Cathy. She's so hot!

I loved this vlog. I had that same problem when I thought I was the only lesbian in my town. What did I do? I moved and now I'm out and extremely happy!

You rock Cathy! Great tips and philosophies!

Please invite Jill to be next, Cathy!! xD

Did Cathy just lick the dog?

Good, I'm not the only one who "pretends" to do that.

"There's no way around life being hard, do it your way!" - I love that!!!!

Maeve and Cathy rock!

Warning: The following post is way more wordy than I expected. I guess it was just really important to me.

Community
I'm not sure I would be the best person to do this because I am only 17 and, as Ellen would say, the number of relationships I've been in, the number of gay people I know, and the number of years I've been out could be counted on no hands, but there really is nothing for gay people here that isn't super-secretive, hard to find, if it has a website it's one that hasn't been updated for years, etc.,

(Sorry for the unreasonable length of the sentence above!)

Still, I am reasonably tech savvy and pretty good at making uncomfortable situations sort of comfortable so if no one else wants do it, I would like to set up a web/real life GLBT community for Birmingham (Alabama) as you described, as well as maybe something separate specifically for GLBT youth, because that's extra important to me. (Another long sentence!) I won't make a site unless someone expresses interest though, maybe you could mention it on your next vlog or something?

Homophobic Moms
It's funny, just about everything you described about homophobic moms was covered in The Truth About Jane (If you haven't seen this made-for-TV movie, you need to, heck it even stars Stockard Channing as the mom, Rupaul as the mom's gay friend, and Ellen Muth as the star. The story's cheesy, especially towards the end, but the acting is so good that I cried about 50 times when I watched it, and I'm not even normally much of a crier.) but luckily, I didn't really get that response from my mom. (Yet another really long sentence!)

My mom was just like "Oh." and then, "I didn't expect this. I thought if one of you kids were gay, it'd be your brother, but I'd be okay with that." Then, "This might just be a temporary thing. You might grow up to realize you're bi or straight or even gay, but no matter what, I'll always love you. Just don't get your hair cut really short and go all butch on me." (Which, actually, I did recently. Whoops!) She proceeded to tell me she was bicurious and kinda jealous that I would get the opportunity to learn about myself a way she never did. So, overall, it was a good experience, I guess.

Note: I already tried to post this once, but the server screwed up. -_- I looked, but I didn't see my post... but if this is a double-post, sorry.

_____________________
Obsessive? Me? Never!

The advice that you've offered in the past has always been thoughtful and sound.  The advice this week was brilliant!  I didn't have the internet or any support whatsoever when I was struggling with 'coming out'.  There are so many resources available today, even for people who don't live in large or diverse communities.  I think just your vlog alone will help a whole lot of people find it within themselves to be exactly who they are supposed to be.

The only thing I want to add is that being a lesbian wasn't a 'choice', but neither was being 5'2".  "The little people"...and "I don't do short"??...I found that a bit offensive to say the least.   

I was in an internet cafe in Liverpool, England last summer. I checked out afterellen.com (which I do daily), then went back the next day and the site was blocked! I got a pornography warning! Damn ignorance. The administrator had blocked the site becuase it was about lesbians. It made me so mad.

Cathy's frustration with places where you just can't be out reminded me of this.

arrrggghhh. I'm mad just thinking about it!

It is very frustrating that there is so much ignorance in the world and it causes so much heartache. All we can do is be brave and be ourselves and the rest of the world will have to get used to us and hopefully, in time, they will grow out of their ignorance.

Thanks Cathy for being one of the bravest, on the front lines and an example for those in the closet and those keeping them there. It's people like you that will change how the world views us and treats us.

I can't say thanks to you and your guests enough.

Superman indead , SUPERLEZBO DEBUONO!!!

I just wanted to apologize to Cathy for my temporary insanity in my previous comment about 'the little people' and 'I don't do short'.  Those were comments made on this site and were not a reflection on your vlog.  I thought it was awesome and I think you're the coolest!!

Besides, I"m not short, I'm fun sized... 

Cathy

Kissing a straight girl...oh no! What happened to being a role model for lesbians everywhere? Is this your mad mission?

Despite this, I loved the advice this week, it was strong and heartfelt and brilliant. And I admire Maeve, she is incredibly talented and has a wonderful, open, honest appreciation for the queer community. Together, I thought you gave great suggestions and support for women working to get out of the closet. 

But wow, straight girls are trouble. I mean c'mon--"you have soft lips?" That's a killer. 

could not stop staring at cathy's arms.....

eventhough it was an innocent little peck of a kiss that was pretty friggin hot....

love love love maeve...and cathy of course.

i'm 5'3 and my ex was 5'11....i think it comes down to what you're attracted to, but if you're not going to give someone a chance b/c of their height, then you just might miss out on a great person due to a physical attribute.

 "straight" girls are trouble!!