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News, Reviews & Commentary on Lesbian and Bisexual women in Entertainment and the Media

Ellen DeGeneres interviews Portia de Rossi, who "also happens to be my wife"

On The Ellen DeGeneres Show today, millions watched Ellen DeGeneres's much-touted interview with Portia de Rossi, star of the new ABC comedy Better Off Ted and the woman who "also happens to be my wife," as Ellen introduced her.

Ellen made Portia take off her shoes to show they were the same height ("That's the main reason I had you on the show, actually"), then announced it was their seven-month wedding anniversary and quizzed Portia on what it was like being married to her. Portia told stories about how no one knows who she is when they travel, because Ellen is so famous.

Then they talked about Better Off Ted, with Ellen making a funny point about Portia being drawn to play icy, insensitive characters, and Portia explaining she enjoys those roles because in real life she cares too much about what people think.

The whole interview was charming, a little awkward, and very subversive because of the ways in which it normalized a lesbian relationship.

Watch the interview here:

After the interview, they challenged a straight couple from the audience in a round of the classic Newlywed Game, which compares Ellen and Portia's answers on questions like "If Ellen was reincarnated as a dog, what kind of dog would it be?" and "How old was Portia when she had her first kiss?"

See how well they fared here:

Having the heterosexuals-only dating site eHarmony.com sponsor the Newlywed Game was a little odd, given how publicly homophobic their founder is. I can't seem to find any evidence of them having sponsored segments on the show before (regular Ellen watchers, let me know if I missed one), so maybe this is their way of trying to make amends with the LGBT community? Or they just don't care that the game included a same-sex couple, because at the end of the day, business is business and Ellen's audience is exactly the kind of demographic eHarmony wants to get in front of.

UPDATE: For what it's worth, a queer employee of eHarmony just contacted me to explain that the site is integrating gay and lesbian dating into its new site, compatiblepartners.net, launching on March 31st, and that it's only technical/logistical issues that are preventing them from including this option in the eHarmony site moving forward. According to the source, the company has received a lot of angry calls and emails from conservatives because of their plans to include LGBT dating in the new site, but the company is defending their decision, and that has made the company's many gay and lesbian employees both relieved and hopeful about the direction of the company.

The politics of advertising aside, I personally found the game segment to be more entertaining than the interview, and even more subversive because it put Ellen and Portia on equal footing with a heterosexual couple — literally and figuratively.

Singing "I've Got You, Babe" together in the faux-bathroom at the end of the episode was cute, too.

The whole episode was another one of those quietly revolutionary moments. You just have to read all the gushing tweets about the interview from people across America to see how many people, gay and straight, were charmed by their appearance on the show together today. For many straight people, Ellen and Portia are the only same-sex couple they know, and that's why this episode, and Friday's "rehearsal" episode, will arguably do more for improving the visibility of same-sex marriage than all the Prop. 8 PSAs put together.

Not that PSAs, marches, and gay rights campaigns aren't important, but people absorb messages differently (and arguably more easily) when they're packaged as entertainment vs. education — and that's why lesbian/bi visibility in entertainment matters.

Watch Ellen and Portia's "rehearsal" for this interview

  • Sarah Warn's blog
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  • jamlawgirl's picture

    too frickin cute!!

    OMG how cute are Ellen and Portia? Soo cute! Cute enough to melt even my jaded heart.

    I must confess I wasn't too crazy about Portia, but she's definitely growing on me and she seems to make Ellen very happy.

    It would have been nice to see some more demonstrative affection between them - especially after they both said love/"her heart" was the best gift they'd given each other. But cute nevetheless.

    Dorothy Snarker's picture

    eHarmony sponsorship

    Gosh, I love love loved this episode and Ellen and Portia's adorable subversiveness.

    That said, I don't think we should give eHarmony a big happy inclusion hug just yet. The reason they sponsored The Newlywed Game on Ellen's show is because they are sponsoring the ENTIRE new The Newlywed Game series that is set to launch April 6 on GSN (you can hear the host mention the new show's premiere date at the end of the clip). So it's a wholesale plug for their new gameshow. Granted, it was nice of them to allow The Newlywed Game name, etc. to be used on Ellen's show. But they have a lot of fences to mend with the GLBT community, period.



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    Why I Don't Sleep Much: Dorothy Surrenders. Oh, and I'm an utter twit.

    Ed Would's picture

    Also

    eHarmony will soon be launching a 'partner' site for same-sex relationships (weirdly called 'Compatible Partners, I shall include the link after), so it makes sense for them to be willing to sponsor Ellen's show and appear open and friendly to the LGBT community, from a business perspective.

     

    http://www.compatiblepartners.net/

    Harpy's picture

    eHarmony

    Personally I hope it becomes a money sink for them because no gays use it.

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    Shya11's picture

    A nice surprise..

    I was reading all of the comments and watching a new show on abc called Castle and heard our happy couple mentioned.

    One Guy says:  "I'm tellin you, true commitment is a thing of the past, I mean name one happy couple."

    Castle says: " Degeneres and De Rossi."

    Another guy says: " Ooh I think he gotcha there bro."

    I loved it!! No gay joke no nothing. Just a simple comment. I wish I knew how to put the link of the clip on here but since I don't I hope you'll watch the show. It's pretty good. There's more but you get the point.

    Thanks Ellen and Portia. The two of you are helping to change the world. Now we all need to become more visible so that people can see that we are normal and we are not going away.

    Thanks Sarah For posting this.

     

    imthey's picture

    Good Catch...

    I'm glad that you brought this up as I was beginning to think that I was the only one that watches "Castle"... that was a really great comeback on the show and with no sarcasm meant at all, just a matter-of-fact statement.

    It's moments like this, along with Ellen and Portia on "The Ellen DeGeneres Show" that will hopefully wake people up to the fact that the LGBTQ community is just like everyone else out there...  

    "I have a simple philosophy. Fill what's empty. Empty what's full. And scratch where it itches." -Alice Roosevelt Longworth

    Clara's picture

    aww that sounds awesome!

    aww that sounds awesome! but i have never heard of castle. not sure i can watch it..

    ________________________________

    My AfterEllen/Bridget Video Game

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    DocCovington's picture

    *LOL*

    Sooooo cute!!

    "How is married life for you?

    Hahahaha! Awww. :)

    jsh's picture

    "Her heart" that was soooo

    "Her heart" that was soooo sweet :X:X:X

    Great show... loved it!!!!

     

    Stop searching and you'll find it.

    In life it doesn't matter how may times you breath, but the moments that let you breathless.

     

    Natazzz's picture

    Very cute

    I thought this post needed one more "cute" comment ;-) 

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    Who doesn't have a blog these days?

    eurOut for all your European queer needs
    aleigha's picture

    love them so much! =D

    With Ellens humor and Portias hotness, they make the perfect couple :) ♥ 

    peace and love *swack*

    Julia's picture

    ellen and portia

    I haven't read any negative comments about them. Even the mean members of celebrity and gossip communities seem to like them. Thats cool.

    The interview was kinda boring, but they have great chemistry. I love them together!

    Susi's picture

    Aaaaawww!!!

    Everyone already said it but they are so cute and my cheeks hurt from smiling so much.

    And thanks for posting the clip because this episode won't air in Sweden for another month and a half and I was really looking forward to seeing it.

    mak 23's picture

    it's just really nice to see

    it's just really nice to see ellen so happy. the way she looks at portia is hopefully something that will pull at everyone's heart strings! I loved this.
    I just sat and smiled the entire show...it was def. a moment to remember. Visibility is so important....thank you ellen and portia!!! :)
    bananaf's picture

    hearts

    Wow, I could actually see red hearts flying across the room. They're so lovey dovey, even if they try to not show it as much.

    I love love love the way Portia dances and I adore her personality! You rock!

    Clara's picture

    eeee, it looks good. i

    eeee, it looks good. i didn't used to majorly like Portia (although I knew i knew little of her and that I could be so wrong)but ahh she seems so lovely, and lovely together ^___^

    I wish Ellen was a big show over here. i've never heard anybody mention it, but we do know who she is

    edit: perhaps her characters are why I never realised she was so warm.  Obviously I get its acting but you can usually tell stuff about ppl from their acting still

    in the clip. what was the point in throwing away the key, they could clearly have a copy and then he did at the end anyways. wow they can both move well and she has some legs! lucky Ellen!!

    yay she grew up watching BBC :D

    ________________________________

    My AfterEllen/Bridget Video Game

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    TruMischief's picture

    Word Choice

    I couldn't understand why you and Dorothy Snarker kept using subversive about this interview.  I understand the concept of wanting to overthrow the establishment but it was my understanding and it took three dictionaries online to find it but it is to work undercover from inside an establishement to bring it down,  I think what Ellen did was not so covert but Hello, I am here I am married and want to stay married.  I can't say I blame her.  They make a great couple and the interview, well it just wasn't long enough.

     

    viv24's picture

    eharmony

    my understanding is eharmony is offering same-sex options AFTER A LAWSUIT, Sarah doen't mention the lawsuit,
    Chele_3D's picture

    CUTE COUPLE

    Hopefully, "normal folks" will get it now! They are so in love and adoreable!!

    Everyone has people in their lives that are gay, lesbian or transgender or bisexual. They may not want to admit it, but I guarantee they know somebody. — Billie Jean King

    Indigoray's picture

    Can't even think straight

    They are so cute together.  I smiled all the way through the episode.

    Gawd, Portia's hot! Ellen is one lucky lady.

    Did you catch Ellen's comment in her monologue?  She said she's been so nervous that she can't even think straight! 

     

    nette's picture

    Portia and Ellen

    oh they are too dang cute all in love and stuff...they make me feel hopeful :-D
    Najara87's picture

    Ellen and Portia are cute

    Ellen and Portia are cute together, I think they have a lot of chemistry!!!

     

     

    La mejor manera de librarme de la tentación es caer en ella

    rusty_tiffany's picture

    so freaking cute!!

    i tivoed the episode cause i was at work when it aired, and i couldn't stop smiling the whole time i watched it last night, the whole thing was just so adorable!! ellen looked so incredibly happy to have portia there, she kept looking at her and beaming, and portia was really cute, which made me happy cause i didn't really know much about her other than she's australian and she married ellen. the two of them just seemed so happy and comfortable with each other it was so cute.

    the only thing i would have liked to see was a little more physical affection between them, but i understand why they woul be wary of that. besides, portia saying ellen's love and ellen saying portia's heart were the best gifts they'd ever gotten from each other was almost perfect enough to make up for it =)

    rncubfan's picture

    As usual Ellen's got class

    I loved how she teased us with the "whoopi" question, but then kept it above the table.  She has an unbelievable knack for knowing where the line is and also when to cross it. 

    I think she is one of the most genuine people in show business.

    Jamie's picture

    I would know who Portia is.

    I would know who Portia is. Arrested Development, duh. 

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    http://stuffqueerpeopleneedtoknow.wordpress.com/

    smartie's picture

    so many reasons...

    Thank you Sarah for this article and the videos, were I live we would probably only have seen this episode 9 months from now! Made my day, scratch that, my week!
    I loved this for so many reasons, mostly for showing the mainstream people of the world just how functional a gay married couple is/can be. Also it was very sweet and funny, thank you once again.

     

     

    *don't judge*

    wordswork's picture

    Acting like a couple?

    They were totally adorable. I had no idea Portia was so short.

    Although I agree that Portia's appearance represented hugh strides for us in visibility, I didn't see them "acting like a couple."

    When you see your mate and walk up to them, wouldn't you give them a kiss, a little peck on the cheek? Something? I didn't expect them to start making out right there in the chairs, but other than Ellen's facial expressions, she treated Portia just like any other guest.

    And why no embrace (or kiss) when they got a question right on the "Newlywed Game"?

    There was no contact during the interview. No holding hands. No nothin'. I defintely think their interactions were sanitized for the straight viewers. Maybe some gay couples don't do PDAs, but when it's for the benefit of straight people's comfort level, it bothers me because I still don't think they're seeing us as we really are. It's like an act.

    NerdyWordie's picture

    Frustrating, I Know

    It was especially obvious when the straight couple got the vacation and kissed. Ellen and Portia looked like they wanted to kiss when they got the question right.

    I know it's daunting to give your mate affection in front of straight people; it can't help but be political which is definitely a romance killer but I think you are right. We have to make people accustomed to it. My ex used to hate PDA because she thought it wasn't polite to do it in front of strangers, esp kids. Now, I didn't stick my hands down her pants or my tongue down her throat, but I thought it was weird to worry about strangers' comfort level if they would try to shame us for being ourselves. 

    From the quirky gay male best friend in rom-coms to the cheerful, goofy lesbian host, LQBT folks are de-sexualized to be "sanitized" for public consumption. Until we are free to display just as much love and affection as straight folks, we will never be really accepted.

    Angie5x5's picture

    Ellen's approach is more effective


    Ellen & Portia did hold hands . . . sort of. They held hands while singing "I Got You Babe" - the uncut version on the website. That makes me wonder what else might have been cut.

    I don't completely disagree with you, but I think it's just as important to have people like Ellen working within the system. I personally believe she has done more for the advancement of mainstream America's perception of gay people than anyone today. She does make compromises to accomplish that, but I think she pushed the envelope with this episode (in a good way). She's always walking that fine line between enlightening and alienating straight people, and she deserves credit for moving that line.

    Their interaction may seem intentionally tame to us, but I watched this episode with straight family members who love Ellen but didn't want to watch anymore when Ellen took Portia's shoe off. You would have thought she had thrown her down and mounted her from their reaction.

    On the other hand, I don't care what straight people think of us . . . except for the fact that they have to power to take away our rights as they did with Prop 8. Which is why we need more Ellens.

    NerdyWordie's picture

    I agree

    Ellen's standup has never been risque or sexually charged, just really goofy and funny. I don't think she is personally comfortable with talking about sex or being sexual in public and she shouldn't have to be.

    It's sad that the only lesbian couples that make Page 6 are her and Portia or Lindsey and Sam. The only representations are super wholesome or super volatile. Lesbian relationships are either handholding and chaste kisses or full-on makeout sessions and fist fights. Maybe it's an extension of the whole feminist Madonna/Whore dichotomy.

    I thought it was sweet when Ellen took her shoe off. Very Cinderella.

    ichoosenoise's picture

    I know it's been said

    I know it's been said 195871095 times already in the comments, but they're so CUTE. I couldn't be happier that they're probably the most recognized lesbian couple out there. Made my day.
    Discoveries's picture

    Awwwwwww...

    ...they are so cute, adorable, amazing, wonderful, beautiful, totally lovely...
    maclay's picture

    Too cute

    Well that's my dose of the warm and fuzzies for this week.

    rubbaduck's picture

    revolutionary? yes. ground

    revolutionary? yes. ground breaking? yes. over all cheese ball? yes. i didn't enjoy. thought it was too stilted.. (watched it from beginning to end, though!)
    Susan Gabriel's picture

    Truly Revolutionary

    I haven't watched the show yet. I recorded it on the DVR so my partner and I can watch it together tonight. But I get hopeful just reading about it. Visibility really does matter and images like these move our culture forward. Thanks, Sarah, for your excellent post.  

    www.SeekingSaraSummers.com

    crazychets's picture

    Loved the eppie

    It was brilliant, just so natural to see both Portia and Ellen on screen, 

    they really bring the normality of relationships if there was an agenda behind it, but I dont think that was the case. I think it made great TV, and Portia must be one of a handful of ppl Ellen has never interviewed and it makes sense for ratings too not that TEDS needs it, I watch it daily or tivo it. :-) 

     

    Love the show!!! Ellen and Portia are too cute!! 

     

    balance and perservance

    lubitup's picture

    i hope they are as happy as

    i hope they are as happy as they look

    and as happy as they make me feel for them.

     

    but i'm sure its just a celebrity double crush

    Bent's picture

    What they mean to the kids..

    My mom and  I were talking about it again today, and it made her tear up when I mentioned how much it would have meant to me as a teenager to see this happy gay couple on tv, looking at each other lovingly, acknowledging their marriage and just being happy. I'm glad that so much has changed and improved in the last 20 years and I know that Ellen and Portia yesterday probably made a big difference in the lives of young gays and lesbians. 
    sundancer's picture

    all i can say is

    they are such an adorable couple!!! :D
    brownlipstick's picture

    As a fellow Australian, I

    As a fellow Australian, I am so proud of Portia and what she has accomplished throughout her careers. She's absolutely brilliant and there's just this sweetness about her that I can't explain in words. I love her on Ally McBeal and the fact that there are very few Australians who landed on a big role in a popular and hit American series really says something about her commitment and dedication.

    Go Portia!!!! Make Australia proud!!!!

    MiiSZ Fee-Fee BABiiE's picture

    THEY ARE TOO CUTE

    OMG ii WANNA B LiiKE ELLEN WHEN ii TURN LiiKE 21..[3YEARS FRM NOW]...ii LOVE THE RELATiiONSHiiP THAT SHE HAS WiiTH HER WiiFE...SHE iiNSiPiRED ME 2 WANNA GET MARRiiED B.C YUU CAN SEE HOW HAPPY MARRiiED LIFE MADE HER

    MiiSZ FEE-FEE BABiiE WENT THAT WAY ===>

    Kora's picture

    BROVO ELLEN AND PORTIA

    this just proves that people love to see real love

    i thought the whole thing was so cute

    my high school prom is hollywood theme me and "my college girl" are going in the inspired styles of  ellen and portia not as them but in their style and what they bring to hollywood when they're around I can't wait

     ∞ ∞ Shakora ∞ ∞

    stolen balloons's picture

    I just watched it...

    I just watched it... finally. And that was the cutest interview... how Portia acted like it was just a regular interview. It was ADORABLE! So cute! Made it seem like it was just like any normal relationship and on basic television. SO DAMN CUTE it brought a tear to my eye.
    Janine's picture

    ellen show

    I saw this episode on Star World and they CUT the scene where ellen and portia play the newlyweds game. They only showed the heterosexual couple. I was like... WTF?!
    Lourdes's picture

    Heart

    The clip of them singing I Got You Babe made my heart happy 

    :-)

     

     

    -Yellow matter custard...dripping from a dead dog's eye-