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"Guiding Light" mini-cap 7/10: How Do You Solve a Problem Like Leccia?Cue The Sound of Music. OK, as unimaginative as it is, GL had to create a storyline to logistically answer Jessica Leccia’s four week maternity leave. Essentially, they asked themselves, how do you solve a problem like Leccia? So, naturally, the powers that be chose a pregnancy and an abbey retreat with forced nun control. So every time I ask myself questions like, why did Liv decide to take a jog around the pond instead of immediately going to Natalia? And why did she wait until the next day to call the love of her life, who out of the blue says through an interpreter that she doesn’t want to see her? I have to answer myself with that definite daytime dilemma: How do you solve a problem likeLeccia? Of course — you send her to the sisters, just not the Sapphic sort. And so we begin.
A sleep deprived Liv calls Nat and leaves a message, pleading for her to pick up the phone. Liv runs to the farmhouse desperately knocking on the door; running from window to window calling Natalia’s name. More phone calls begging Nat not to ignore her. Liv trembles with foreboding. Olivia goes to the police station to report a missing person, not that the SPD could find their hand in the dark. And what would an Otalia-themed scene be without Frank? I wouldn’t have the slightest idea, because he is here in perpetuum. Frank reasons cold feet for why Natalia didn’t show, but Liv responds absolutely not, Natalia is honest with her. The smirk of the schmuck across the table says, Hello, my name is Frank, have we met? True, she did honestly dump you at the alter. Father Ray apologizes to Olivia. He was supposed to tell her that he counseled Natalia to leave town on a retreat for conflictedde -programming, but a parishioner was involved in an accident and he was otherwise engaged. Yet somehow Bishop Beelzebub found time to be in the barbecue montage.
Liv is paralyzed with fear and calls Philip to drive her home. Then Liv arrives at the farmhouse. Other than on the vehicle of inconsistent editing, I’m not sure how she got there. Nevertheless, trying to pen a note to Natalia with palsied hand is useless. She crumples the note, throws it at the house, and buckles into a sobbing heap. Having enlisted a combative reinforcement self-restrained by Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell, Olivia waits on the other half of her female buddy movie so they can search every nunnery,abby, and Carmelite convent for Natalia. Doris arrives dragging a huge suitcase and half the mini-mart. Honestly, it’s nice to see a suitcase used for what it was intended instead of the conspicuous concealment of baby bump. I understand completely, Doris, what’s a road trip without a fewCheez-its, and you never know what shoes will be required for Nat tracking.
My apprehension subsides as Olivia starts the engine of the white Nissan and not a retro baby blue convertible. Though honestly, I have always envisioned Doris with a convertible and head scarf. With no Grand Canyon and onlyOakdale in sight, Olivia and Doris begin the adventure of answering the question, how do you solve a problem like Leccia? Contemplating the virtues of Oakdale, Doris thinks about her impending network-induced term limit. She ponders moving to Oakdale and running for mayor. It’s a nice thought, but considering Oakdale is a CBS city with its full compliment of two gays, it’s just not going to happen. The first stop is a bust as it is a retreat for nuns, though Doris does point out that Natalia could pass. And so could Liv with that forced network chastity agreement. On to St. Andrew. Could the writer’s of GL be having a little fun with us as “St. Andrew’s Cross” is an X and X marks the spot? Nah, that sounds as contrived as red herring. Olivia tries to convince the mother superior to let her see Natalia. The head mother is steadfast. Liv tries to play upon her Christian compassion saying God sent her there to alleviate Nat’s pain. Moreappropriately, God should have sent a plague instead. They already have gNat’s, so there are nine more to choose. Let our people go.
Olivia’s dependence on the kindness of strangers denied, she walks away only to circle back as if a streetcar upon its route of desire. “Natalia, I love you! And you love me and two people who love each other should never be kept apart. Natalia!” No-talia. Olivia wants to go home. She doesn’t want to be this pathetic character any more. She came for answers and got nun. And that’s how you solve a problem like Leccia. For updates and in-between Otalia postings go to www.mindschmootz.net. Submitted by on July 10, 2009 - 4:00pm. |
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Awesomely funny
Hilarious, well done.
I really have no idea where the story is headed next. I guess there isnt an episode tonight then. GL seem to be totally random with their airings.
I'll wait...
Here's my fill in the blank regarding the car issue...
oh jayzuz
this is why i hate soaps
blegh
How Do You Solve a Problem Like Leccia?
How Do You Solve a Problem Like Leccia?
How Do You Solve a Problem Like Leccia?
... bloody LSS!... -_-'
nevertheless, awesome recap m. dawson!
"vehicle of inconsistent editing"
Bwah! Do you ever get the feeling that the people in charge of this show really just don't care? *said in my "I know I'm pointing out the obvious" voice* And now they all have senioritis.
Like today, Bizzie thinks no one showed up at their wedding because the date printed on their invitations was wrong? Like even their parents, relatives, and best friends would show up on the date on the invitation instead of the day they had all been talking about and planning for? Do they think only monkeys watch the show?
Olivia not trying to contact Natalia until the next day made sense to me, though. My take is that she had to run off to the pond to break down because she didn't want anyone else to see her. But she knew it was coming all day. Much like pre-wedding Frank, she had been walking around on a cloud of delusion all week. They are supposed to come out to Emma the night before the BBQ, but Natalia cancels without any explanation...and Liv just accepts that no questions asked? Then Nat says she's running late the day of the BBQ...and Liv doesn't demand to know why? It's almost like calling your fiance up on your wedding day and saying, "Go ahead and start without me." And the're going to tell Emma at the BBQ? Whaaa? Not to mention that Nat has been wearing her "I'm trying to look happy but am really miserable face" for days and sounded pained every time she was forced into returning an "I love you." But Olivia is not as dumb as Frank, so I think deep down she wasn't surprised by Blake's message, and immediately realized that Natalia had left her. She saw the brick flying at her face and just stood there and let it hit her in the head.
It was painful this week watching her waffle between despair, anger, pathetic justifications and delusions, and even a few attempts at maintaining her dignity. Poor Olivia.
Streetcar Named Dolivia was my favorite part of the week. I'm so enjoying depressed Liv and dreading that other gestating plot.
i agree
"My take is that she had to run off to the pond to break down because she didn't want anyone else to see her."
- that's exactly what I thought of when I saw the "running scene"
"Not to mention that Nat has been wearing her "I'm trying to look happy but am really miserable face" for days and sounded pained every time she was forced into returning an "I love you." But Olivia is not as dumb as Frank"
- the powers that be dumbing Olivia down just angers me. can't they think of anything creative and less insulting to their loyal fans to solve a problem like leccia... guhhh...
I just hope
Brilliant
She came for answers and got nun... that is brilliant writing right there.
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Queer Africans say aye!
great stuff!
GL sucks right now, but your recaps rule!
My personal favorite:
And what would an Otalia-themed scene be without Frank? I wouldn’t have the slightest idea, because he is here in perpetuum.
Thanks Again
Thanks for the recap.
I love Otalia. I love this story with all its mix of characters. I have accepted a pregnancy. I have no complaints.
I am always feeling like I want to pinch myself to see if this story is not a dream. I never expected to see Olivia fall in love with a woman. I never expected Crystal Chappell to be given such a juicy part to play. GL had so not respected her talent. I never expected Otalia to be given such a front burner, money couple status. Drama and heartbreak are the hallmark of a money couple.
I loved every second of watching Olivia's agony this week. Doris gets better everyday.
The saddest part for me is that it will end so soon. Not only because I will not be able to see Otalia and all their friends but because I will miss these recaps.
Thanks again!
Jellybean FTW
I think we need more Otalia's glue, she's the key!!!!!
La mejor manera de librarme de la tentación es caer en ella
Yeah, ok, why didn't the
Yeah, ok, why didn't the writers make Dolivia instead of Otalia? I've been seeing more and more fan interest in it, and I have to say, it's awfully appealling. Doris Wolfe (and the actress playing her) are becoming increasingly compelling & she and Olivia have a wonderful snark between them...
Doris
I totally agree. And I think Doris would have come out for Olivia. I mean she tried to recently to her daughter (I forget her name) and as far as we know she doesn't even have a girlfriend.
I would say that if Guiding Light wasn't ending then when Olivia and Natalia broke up (because let's face it, this is a soap) Olivia would get together at some stage with Doris.
Dolivia. I like it. Maybe Dorivia. Hmm...
Doris arrives dragging a huge suitcase and half the mini-mart.
Seriously, your entire recap appropriately screams an AMEN! I agree with another poster that said, not only am I going to miss Otalia, but probably moreso, these recaps.
Love your mind!!
Your recaps are better then the show
I'm sorry fellow GL fans, but Otalia has been going down the toilet since they spa retreat. I've held my tongue for too long over this. (You know, kind of like GL has held out on a kiss for too long!)
I don't even like the character of Natalia Rivera any more. And the thought of her pregnant with dumb asses kid makes it even worse. At what point were we suppose to like Frank? At what point was he suppose to get a life of his own and get out of Otalia's storyline? More importantly, when are these two going to be the amazing same-sex couple the fans were promised? Once, just once, I would love for a show to find other plot devices besides a pregnant, dead, or reformed lesbo. It's tiresome and over played. Kind of like this couple has become.
At this point you are probably asking yourself why I am still watching if I'm so disgusted with these two. Simple, I didn't start out watching GL for Otalia and I'm certainly not going to stop because they chose to turn the couple into a train wreck. That and I'm waiting for Olivia to stop being a wuss and get back to the Tiger I know and love. Hell, I wouldn't mind if she and Doris hooked up. Now that would be an interesting couple. The chemistry is there, too bad GL won't use it. In fact, it's gotten so bad I'm almost wishing Olivia would meet a great man who will whisk her away and revere like the Goddess she is. Goodness knows Natalia Rivera isn't doing it. And we wouldn't want to end a 72 year old show with a happy lesbian couple now would we?
At least there's some chance of Jeva getting back together now that McRapist's plane has crashed. Please JLH and EW, at least do that part right.
"Mother Chucker!" - Blair, Gossip Girl
Great cap as always
Of course — you send her to the sisters, just not the Sapphic sort.
The smirk of the schmuck across the table says, Hello, my name is Frank, have we met? True, she did honestly dump you at the alter.
Yet somehow Bishop Beelzebub found time to be in the barbecue montage.
Honestly, it’s nice to see a suitcase used for what it was intended instead of the conspicuous concealment of baby bump
As the angst increases the re-caps get better and better. So much easier to snark when things get dark. I might be in the minority of people who are digging this story and it's soapy twists and turns but doesn't mean I can't laugh at it too.
Otalia is the end game but in the mean time I look forward to my Friday dose of Dawson AE re-caps
Yippee.
i agree
Well done!!
Even with so little to work with this week you still managed to find stuff to snark at. Good on ya!!! I love your recaps and will certainly miss them when this show is gone!!
Thanks again, m. dawson!!!!!
hrhr, loved the
hrhr, loved the puns:
"No-talia. Olivia wants to go home. She doesn’t want to be this pathetic character any more. She came for answers and got nun."
"No-talia. Olivia wants to
"No-talia. Olivia wants to go home. She doesn’t want to be this pathetic character any more. She came for answers and got nun."
HILARIOUS!!!
oh wow...
just watched this week's clips and dear lord CC deserves emmy's, and just lots of good things, the woman is amazing!
also, absolutely hilarious recap
"Bishop Beelzebub" Genius!
"Bishop Beelzebub" Genius! Every time he comes on the screen I hope that "God" will smite him down. Its people like that who make things hell on earth for the rest of us. Tool.
Your recap, as always was perfect!
I know there was fairly little to go on this week, but... Its a week down. Meaning a week closer to Natalia's return with the spawn of the bad haired weiner. That should be an interesting week.
Plus, by the sounds of it there is some interesting stuff coming up with Olivia. So I am sure CC will keep us more than happy juring Natalia's absence. Perhaps when she gets arrested, she will maybe meat some lovely ladies in jail? ... Ok... I really hope that doesn't happen. *Shudder*
Come back Natalia!! All is forgiven! (Except the sleeping with Frank. To call that a mistake is like saying the Hindenberg was a fender-bender.)
A thought
I understand that JL has to go for maternity leave, but why does Natalia have to show such a big reaction being pregnant?
It's not like they're not mothers already. Olivia has Emma, and Natalia has Rafe. Another kid to join their big family should be welcomed, instead of treated like a "horrific situation" like now.
Broken hearted
Unfreakin believable.... I cannot believe Tal did not leave word, nor letter, nor text, nor e-mail, shall I go on... Tal has broken the number one rule.(If you are breaking up with someone don't you think you should tell them or let'em know) (Not that the Dyknamic Duo is broken up)Liv and Tal need to communicate. At least Tal should have talked to the person who matters most and that is Liv. and what about Jelly Bean ...I know she is crushed. Tal , to me took the cowards way out. Where Liv is at,I have been there, done that...and it is painful and confusing and just downright RUDE!!!
Love You, LuvSong