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Home » Blogs » Grace Chu's blog » Barbie is turning 50

Barbie is turning 50

by
Grace Chu

In 1959, a doll of anatomically impossible proportions named Barbie was introduced to the public. Although Barbie has been called an anti-feminist icon, blamed for causing eating disorders and was even called "filth" by a Christian group, there is no question that Barbie has become a cultural icon. (I suppose one hasn't arrived until one has been called "filth" by a fundamentalist Christian group, so go Barbie!)

Barbie is also about to turn 50, which means that even our mothers and some of our grandmothers used to perform amputations on her and giggle while placing her in dirty poses with Ken (or with other Barbies).

To celebrate this upcoming milestone, I have compiled some side by side comparisons of Barbie and other cultural icons who have recently turned 50. Enjoy.

Barbie vs. Michael Jackson

Barbie Michael Jackson
Went to the moon
 Invented a dance move called the moonwalk
Has had more than 43 pets including 21 dogs, 12 horses, 3 ponies, 6 cats, a parrot, a chimpanzee, a panda, a lion cub, a giraffe and a zebra Ran a zoo at the Neverland Ranch
Made of plastic Reconstructed with silicone
A plaything of little girls I'm not going to go there


Barbie vs. Madonna


Barbie Madonna
Had a best friend named "Midge" Occasionally goes by "Madge"
First had a bellybutton in 2000 Bellybutton named the "most incredible" music celebrity body part by Spin Magazine in 2005
Lacks genitalia Had a hit called "Like a Virgin"


Barbie vs. Ellen DeGeneres

Barbie Ellen DeGeneres
Came in an edition designed by Oscar de la Renta Hosted the Oscars in 2007
Initially sold for $3 in 1959 Had a net worth of $65 million in 2007
Rides a Porsche
 Oh, get your mind out of the gutter

What adventures will Barbie embark on in the next 50 years? Although Ken and Barbie have gotten back together after a brief time apart, Ken virtually admitted he was a friend of Dorothy.. Perhaps Barbie can run off with Midge to raise their 21 dogs, 12 horses, three ponies, six cats, parrot, chimpanzee, panda, lion cub, giraffe and zebra together.

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    • Submitted by
    Grace Chu
    on September 15, 2008 - 3:00pm.
    TAGS :: 
    limors's picture

    Happy Birthday Barbie!

    Submitted by
    limors (169 posts)
    on September 15, 2008 - 3:30pm.
    the Michael Jackson and Ellen DeGeneres gutter humor made me laugh very very loudly.
    Elle Girl's picture

    Haha!

    Submitted by
    Elle Girl (70 posts)
    on September 15, 2008 - 3:31pm.

    You are a rockstar. This just rectified my hellish day. Thanks!

     

    "It might make Elizabeth Hasselbeck cry, but we're gonna do it." - Tina Fey

    snow's picture

    Hahaha rides a porche!!! 

    Submitted by
    snow (30 posts)
    on September 15, 2008 - 3:49pm.
    Hahaha rides a porche!!!  Thanks that the first laugh I've had all day
    Liz's picture

    Porsche

    Submitted by
    Liz (9 posts)
    on September 15, 2008 - 3:58pm.

    HAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHA

    My mind is always in the gutter...

    Jenn's picture

    "Lacks genitalia"

    Submitted by
    Jenn (86 posts)
    on September 15, 2008 - 4:26pm.

    Oh, that made me giggle.

    Caroline's picture

    The gutter jokes made me

    Submitted by
    Caroline (75 posts)
    on September 15, 2008 - 4:38pm.

    The gutter jokes made me laugh.
    Is that so wrong?
    Nahh! =D

    Becky's picture

    yea dude, i lolled

    Submitted by
    Becky (41 posts)
    on September 15, 2008 - 5:02pm.

    yea dude, i lolled

     

    ~becky~

    Abby T.'s picture

    which came first?

    Submitted by
    Abby T. (9 posts)
    on September 15, 2008 - 5:19pm.

    ...the idea for this post, or the Porsche joke?

    Either way, great work. Happy birthday, Barbie.

    Erika's picture

    i seriously laughed so much

    Submitted by
    Erika (268 posts)
    on September 15, 2008 - 5:43pm.

    i seriously laughed so much at the porche joke i was practically rolling on the floor.

     

     "Great.  Not only do I feel creepy but now I look like I'm 1,000 and that I've been smoking meth all my life." -Sara Quin

    lovecatcadillac's picture

    Happy 50th, Barbie...

    Submitted by
    lovecatcadillac (112 posts)
    on September 15, 2008 - 6:45pm.

    My girlfriend and I were talking about Barbie vs. Bratz the other evening, and forgive us for sounding like stuffy old ladies (which would be kinda sad considering I'm nineteen and she just turned twenty), but... yeah, Barbie was painfully anatomically incorrect and materialistic, but at least she DID STUFF. She was an astronaut, a rock star, a presidential candidate, a veterinarian and about a million other professions. She didn't just shop. And yeah, the proportions were crazy, but at least she didn't look emaciated and "bitchfaced" (it's totally a word, I swear) like the Bratz dolls. I saw a Bratz doll once that looked, no joke, like a mini-dominatrix. Why on earth would you buy that for a small girl??

    Nothing's picture

    Barbie and I are the same age!

    Submitted by
    Nothing (469 posts)
    on September 15, 2008 - 6:58pm.
    My first Barbie had bendable legs, but her arms were always straight.  My first was actually Skipper though because my older sisters got the Barbie and Midge dolls.  I still remember the tiny utensil drawer and faux silverware.  The first Barbie dream house took up the entire floor and everyone in the family helped to put it together (unlike today, things were made of cardboard back then).  But, Ken?  Never!  He was one useless doll.
    miss chatelaine's picture

    Grace Chu, I Love You

    Submitted by
    miss chatelaine (467 posts)
    on September 15, 2008 - 9:58pm.

    I remember being about 10 or 12 and playing with my three Barbies - they seldom had clothes because I would lose them (honestly, accidentally), and would uh, enjoy themselves with each other. Not that I really knew what I was doing, except I knew I couldn't do it in front of my sister. And I didn't know I was gay until I was 21!

    No matter what feminists say about Barbie, I still love her. She may have ridiculous proportions, but she never needed a man. She went places, she had things of her own, even if everything was painfully pink.

    Melissa Hsu's picture

    HAHA

    Submitted by
    Melissa Hsu (not verified)
    on September 16, 2008 - 11:22am.

    Rides a porche thanks for the loudest laugh of the day...now back to work ¬_¬

    ladies-clean your tutus

    Model through it's picture

    Lacks genitalia

    Submitted by
    Model through it (143 posts)
    on September 16, 2008 - 2:32pm.

    But how did the pregnant Barbie get pregant? You know the one that came with two stomachs? A pregnant belly that held the baby inside, and the flat stomach after the birth....as I'm writing this I now realize that I'm talking about the Midge doll. Do you think Barbie's jealous of Midge for having a V-hole?

    "There is homophobia in every corner and pocket of this world, but at the core ... you just love someone and want to make mixedtapes for them" -Sara Quin

    coolembo's picture

    Crazy

    Submitted by
    coolembo (14 posts)
    on March 22, 2009 - 9:40am.

    That porshe bit made me laugh the only time today so good on ya


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