by ccpuff

Video Blogs

Make your own bundle of joy with the "Baby Mama" babymaker

For me, the only thing better than a funny woman is two funny women. So, you can imagine my excitement about the April 25 opening of the Tina Fey–Amy Poehler odd-couple comedy Baby Mama. To further whet our appetites, the film has launched the new Baby Mama Babymaker website where you can see the virtual fruits of your (or anyone's) loins. The best thing about the site? Same-sex couplings are not only encouraged, they're prominently displayed.

So, naturally, I had to make my own faux lesbian coupling offspring. The results, um, well. Straight up, I'm not going to lie. These are unquestionably the ugliest babies I have ever seen. In fact, some of them scare the bejesus out of me. I mean it. They're truly, truly terrifying. There, you've been warned.

First I thought I'd match two of the smartest women in entertainment together. Behold the love child of Tina Fey and Jodie Foster. Actually, wee JoTi is almost cute. Almost.

Next, I gave Tina's co-star another shot at happiness. What would Amy Poehler and Katee Sackhoff's little bundle of joy look like? The meeting of hilarious and kick-ass came out looking like a wise-ass, which sort of makes sense.

But here is where things start to go horribly, horribly wrong. The coming together of best friends Penelope Cruz and Salma Hayek should be a nothing but bella, right? Wrong. The skin-tone matching option is sadly lacking. Never before have I wanted so badly to rub self-tanning lotion on an infant.

And things just go downhill from there. I thought I'd try to merge two of the best smiles in Hollywood together in Kate Winslet and Rose Rollins. Oh. Dear. God.

Finally, I decided to end with the seemingly can't miss combination of two of the most gorgeous women on the planet. I mean, if Angelina Jolie and Padma Lakshmi can't make a beautiful baby together, what hope is there for the rest of us? Apparently, very little.

So, those are my best attempts at being a digital OB-GYN. Now it's your turn. Let's see what you and your baby mamas can pop out. Show us your Frankenbabies. I promise to lie and call them cute.

dorothy snarker's blog

Submitted by

Dorothy Snarker

on April 8, 2008 - 5:00pm.

TAGS ::

Um..

Submitted by

pecola (789 posts)

on April 8, 2008 - 4:48pm.

I'm slightly disturbed.

And by slightly, I mean a lot.

Yipes!

-----

Geoffrey: You fool! As if it matters how a man falls down.
Richard: When the fall is all that is left, it matters a great deal.

- The Lion in Winter

Ewwwwwwww...

Submitted by

Marcie (61 posts)

on April 8, 2008 - 6:15pm.

..yucky! These pictures made my stomach hurt.

I mean, I guess I should feel bad cause they are supposed to be kids?

But, I feel like they attacked me first.

Too funny!

Submitted by

JenJen (65 posts)

on April 8, 2008 - 8:54pm.

Indeed they did attack you first! Ha!

...

Submitted by

carolinagrrrl (237 posts)

on April 8, 2008 - 5:27pm.

Thank you, Ms. Snarker, for simultaneously making me laugh harder than I've laughed today and giving me nightmares for the rest of the week.

Aye.

LegallyOut

SWEET JESUS!

Submitted by

Batman (256 posts)

on April 8, 2008 - 6:02pm.

I mean...what beautiful children...just...precious looking...

Muha!!

Submitted by

Gelphie (52 posts)

on April 8, 2008 - 6:27pm.

LMAO!

You would think...

Submitted by

lezgirllover (223 posts)

on April 8, 2008 - 6:33pm.

... that the babies would look a little better???

So funny and disturbing at the same time!

This happens to be

Submitted by

jordan-writes (40 posts)

on April 8, 2008 - 6:46pm.

the greatest thing ever. Now I know what my baby would look like if I ever decided to have one of my friends have it. I'm literally having a field day over this. I've already combined myself with 3 of my friends and sent it to their myspaces. Thank you for showing this to us.

This is great!

Submitted by

Kuffs (52 posts)

on April 8, 2008 - 7:02pm.

Loved, loved, loved the trailer for the movie. I tried to use Mariska and Lucy L. but it turned out even more frightening than these. I'll spare everyone the photo. :)

I have a feeling

Submitted by

MissEarlGrey (17 posts)

on April 8, 2008 - 7:04pm.

That i will have way to much fun with this! Oh and i just had to do it:

http://www.babymamamaker.com/savejpg.php?u=653c35f666dce0ac0e1e6b541a5e6b8a.jpg

A Miranda and Andy baby from Devil Wear Prada. I sens a spoiled brat to come!

holy hell

Submitted by

melissa (97 posts)

on April 8, 2008 - 7:11pm.

my eyes hurt now

that was very disturbing and also the funniest thing ive seen all day

thanks

sweet ZOMBIE

Submitted by

Bekkah (68 posts)

on April 8, 2008 - 7:18pm.

sweet ZOMBIE jesus.

they're so....*gags* cuuuuute.

i've seen incestual mutations better looking than those kids....

god help us if this is what bone-marrow insemination leads to!

sweetzombieBABY

Submitted by

Chantelle (12 posts)

on April 8, 2008 - 7:42pm.

haha...

sweet zombie BABY jesus.

I've never laughed so hard!

Too funny!

Submitted by

junglequeen (67 posts)

on April 8, 2008 - 7:21pm.

HAHAHA! I'm still laughing out loud

GREAT!

Submitted by

dylan_english (12 posts)

on April 8, 2008 - 7:31pm.

seems like a great film! and the pictures lol i have never laughed so much lol i still have the giggles haha

Ugh

Submitted by

AnotherFrenchGirl (29 posts)

on April 8, 2008 - 8:31pm.

As a Fuffy fan, I tried a Fuffy baby... I HAD to pick some pictures... not the best ones I think because that baby is just... Ewwwwwww

http://babymamamaker.com/babyimg/d97263dc4554d3ee22a68e78ec10d172.jpg

But that made me laugh a lot before going to bed ! Thanks !

Oh. My. God.

Submitted by

whitelabcoat (71 posts)

on April 9, 2008 - 10:44am.

Checked out your pic - How could it go so horribly wrong for our subtexty, slashtastic heroes? Thanks for the laugh.

McBennett

Submitted by

AnnaRG (64 posts)

on April 8, 2008 - 8:31pm.

okay i basically HAD to.

Sweet baby jebus

Submitted by

Aj (203 posts)

on April 8, 2008 - 8:53pm.

Now that's just wrong. That thing looks like it would kill me in my sleep.

wow.

Submitted by

boywithmoonandstars (191 posts)

on April 9, 2008 - 2:51pm.

I'd heard of fugly, but I'd never really seen it.....until now.

Haha! That is too goood.

Submitted by

Steph (19 posts)

on April 8, 2008 - 8:58pm.

Little McBennett looks exactly how I think she would be. A snarky mischevious little troublemaker.

AAHHHHHH

Submitted by

Batman (256 posts)

on April 8, 2008 - 9:06pm.

I feel like in 7 days this thing will crawl out of my tv.

haha...still laughing..

Submitted by

MEL257 (87 posts)

on April 8, 2008 - 10:44pm.

I had that same thought....hahahaha!!

Good Lord, creatures from the under-world DO exist

Submitted by

Broadway Baby (121 posts)

on April 9, 2008 - 12:03am.

See, now that is what the conservatives think will happen if we promote homosexuality. So STOP GIVING THEM EVIDENCE!!!

Please, PLEASE

Submitted by

audur (57 posts)

on April 8, 2008 - 10:17pm.

Please, PLEASE never have a baby together, Bridget and Jill.

I think I'll have nightmares about McBennet for years.

HAHAHA....

Submitted by

MEL257 (87 posts)

on April 8, 2008 - 10:42pm.

That's awesome.....my sides hurt, I can't stop laughing!!! I'm sure if it were possible they would have a gorgeous baby but anything would be better than that...hahaha...McBennett!!!

HAHAHAHA...

Submitted by

carolinagrrrl (237 posts)

on April 9, 2008 - 1:27am.

I was waiting for someone to post a compilation of AfterEllen vloggers!

The fact that the combination of these two gorgeous ladies results in such an abomination is proof that this babymaker CAN'T be right! However, it is sure to provide me more hours of entertainment tomorrow at work than should be legal. For that gift, I am forever indebted!

LegallyOut

OMG!

Submitted by

Bronwyn (4 posts)

on April 9, 2008 - 1:52am.

I don't think Baby Bridget will be to happy with her new sibling... Hell I'm backing away slowly hoping it won't jump from the screen and tear me to pieces...

It's official Jill and Bridget should never make a baby together tho seperate, they should have as many lil bridget and jill's as possible...

best looking baby ever!

Submitted by

Col (19 posts)

on June 6, 2008 - 8:38pm.

best looking baby ever!

Thank you....

Submitted by

sc girl (6 posts)

on April 8, 2008 - 9:09pm.

Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.....

for helping me to finally get all the sn*t out of my congested sinuses. You mean after all the Vitamin C, medication, soup, juice, etc... all I had to do was LMAO?

Wow

Submitted by

Elisabeth (121 posts)

on April 8, 2008 - 9:11pm.

That whole thing was scary and hilarious at the same time! It is a crime though because i highly doubt these beautiful women would have ugly babies like this. Yet it still cracks me up everytime i see one of those little buggers. The Penelope/Salma and Kate/Rose one will haunt me forever i think, those are quite possibly THE scariest spawns of beauty i have ever seen.

Little McBennett looks like an ugly teenage boy, that is just not right people!

Wow

Submitted by

sc girl (6 posts)

on April 8, 2008 - 9:15pm.

I think a better name for it would be "Chucky"....

Yes now that i see that

Submitted by

Elisabeth (121 posts)

on April 8, 2008 - 9:17pm.

Yes now that i see that picture, Little Mcbennett seems to have the same evil glint in its eye, poor poor Jill and Bridget and their ugly little baby Chucky....

Scary!

Submitted by

Mari (17 posts)

on April 8, 2008 - 9:16pm.

I will be having nightmares after this, for sure.

The saddest part is that they will include Jill and Bridget... they are usually signs of a great night of sleep. Not this time.

Whoa!!

Submitted by

shygurl99 (210 posts)

on April 8, 2008 - 9:30pm.

*Coughs* I mean what adorable babies. I tried to make a baby but the results were so bad my computer refused to let me see them

"I believe all Americans who believe in freedom, tolerance and human rights have a responsibility to oppose bigotry and prejudice based on sexual orientation. "-Coretta Scott King

Great.

Submitted by

FonFreaka. (57 posts)

on April 8, 2008 - 9:31pm.

Thanks for the nightmares, xD!

...and all was well, and the world smiled.

dies

Submitted by

refrigeratoraider (483 posts)

on April 8, 2008 - 10:36pm.

WHEN IS THIS EVER OKAY?!??

I got a dick like a mule...with a big dick.

Oh my! Bless it's little

Submitted by

Aj (203 posts)

on April 8, 2008 - 10:57pm.

Oh my! Bless it's little heart.

You are responsible for

Submitted by

sati_49 (267 posts)

on April 8, 2008 - 11:04pm.

You are responsible for your own happily ever after.

Binks meets Tipping the Velvets Johdi May

BinksJohdi MayThe Creation

HAHAHA!

Submitted by

Cass (30 posts)

on April 8, 2008 - 11:19pm.

Wow! that is not what i thought a Mcbennett baby would look like,

too funny!

Now, a Sarah/Lori baby, hmmmm....

Lucy & Renne

Submitted by

artistic_boricua (3 posts)

on April 8, 2008 - 11:29pm.

Photobucket

I had to add them!! :o)

" And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom"

--Anais Nin

Yesss

Submitted by

Elisabeth (121 posts)

on April 9, 2008 - 1:30am.

Wow nice add! And its actually not that bad, this baby looks incredible compared to some of the other monstrocities weve seen on here. Just goes to prove my theory that Lucy and Renee can do no wrong! Love it :D

Ok one more

Submitted by

sati_49 (267 posts)

on April 8, 2008 - 11:32pm.

Ok so I totally stole a pix for this from Karman’s Myspace (Don’t hate me Karman) but I had to go with the rumors and see just for fun what a Jill, Karman baby would look like. I call it Jillman. Or you know TatterTott

Jill and SarahKarman, and Sarah and Lori of course

and then there was The Baby

You are responsible for your own happily ever after.

AHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!

Submitted by

Marcie (61 posts)

on April 9, 2008 - 12:04am.

WTF!!!!

baby mama baby maker is EVILLLLL!!!!!!

i agree its evil

Submitted by

melissa (97 posts)

on April 9, 2008 - 12:19am.

i agree baby mama babymaker is evil

i feel like i need to wash my eyes

those babies wow

I. Can't. Breathe.

Submitted by

Dorothy Snarker (1425 posts)

on April 9, 2008 - 1:01am.

I am laughing so hard. The Baby Mama Babymaker IS evil. You should have seen the abominations I didn't use in the post. Even Lucifer himself would be like, “Dude, that is one messed up baby.”

---------------------------------------------------
Why I Don't Sleep Much: Dorothy Surrenders

WHAT!?

Submitted by

Elisabeth (121 posts)

on April 9, 2008 - 1:36am.

You did not even use the worst ones!? Hahaha i would really like to know which ones were worst, even though i am afraid to ask because i cannot imagine any babies being more scary then these!

The Baby Mama Maker, the creator of the spawns of evil, lol. I still love it though, had me cracking up the whole time, thank you ones again Miss Snarker :D.

good kind of laughter

Submitted by

wickedgrrl (257 posts)

on April 9, 2008 - 1:07am.

oh. I needed that. Thank you. I haven't laughed that much in a month. my brain needed to shut down for a few precious minutes and that helped so much.

frightening. *shudders*

McManus in '08! Vote now. Vote often. www.curvemag.com

Oh my god

Submitted by

Lemona (171 posts)

on April 9, 2008 - 2:02am.

More evidence that babies are terrifying.

Stay away babies! Stay away!!

OMG indeed

Submitted by

vicky h (6 posts)

on April 9, 2008 - 5:51am.

That BabyMamaMaker is just wroooong...

What were they thinking - babies aren't THAT ugly...

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