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Amy Sedaris cleans up in more ways than one

There aren’t too many guarantees in life. You’ve got your death. Then taxes. And, finally, that Amy Sedaris will kill on the late-night talk shows.

So last week, when she stopped by comedian Chelsea Handler‘s E! talkfest, Chelsea Lately, I was expecting hijinks. I was not, however, expecting hijinks on this magnitude. Please, prepare yourself for designer replicas of the female anatomy, thumb tacks and unpleasant secretions.

Words, there are no words. I think even Chelsea was stunned, and it’s hard to stun that gal. By the way, my dad totally taught me the Land O’ Lakes boobs trick when I was like 8 years old. Clearly, my dad was awesome.

Amy’s most recent late-night hilarity is the latest in what looks like a very busy 2009 for the actress/comic/writer/hostess extraordinaire. Amy is currently promoting the paperback release of her best-selling hospitality handbook, I Like You.

She has also been filming a multi-episode appearance on the hit TNT drama The Closer alongside Kyra Sedgwick that will air when the series returns in January. Amy will play the sister of agent Fritz Howard (Jon Tenney) and soon-to-be sister-in-law of Kyra’s Deputy Chief Brenda Johnson.

According to TV Guide, she will play a “a psychic who’s wandered the occupational landscape, taking on, at various times, the job of yoga instructor, glass blower, Cirque de Soleil student …” Yep, that sounds right up Amy’s alley.

Amy also just signed a production deal with 20th Century Fox to create a new comedy series. Amy and her Strangers With Candy co-creator Paul Dinello are developing the show together, so expect utter insanity. No other details have been released on the concept, except that it’s from an idea Amy had six years ago.

If the new show has anything to do with felt anatomical displays (and even if it doesn’t), I am so there.

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