Best. Lesbian. Week. Ever. (December 21, 2007)

 
 

TILA TEQUILA TO WORLD BARTENDER: “MAKE IT A STIFF ONE”

So have you recovered? Are you still gnashing your teeth? Is your head pounding worse than it will in response to any vat of eggnog you happen to encounter this season? I refer, of course, to the season finale of A Shot at Love With Tila Tequila. (Spoilers follow. But if you don’t know who won by now, you really must be hitting the hooch lately.)

Karman has all the sordid details in her recap, and Malinda offers some insightful analysis in her Year in Review article and The Lo-Down. So I’ll focus on the psychological damage.

Actually, I can’t say I was surprised by Tila’s choice. That doesn’t mean I understand it, because Bobby doesn’t exactly seem like a catch to me. For one thing, his hair (especially when viewed from the side) looks like a patch of cat’s fur after prolonged washing of that particular spot.

That said, he’s also safe, malleable and the only possible choice in light of this country’s tendency to pick the regular guy who is good company at the bar. Tila explained her choice thusly on her MySpace blog:

So here I am with Bobby. Yes, I know a lot of you wanted me to pick Dani, and so did I…..but at the end of the day, I felt as though Dani and I became SOOOO close that I didn’t want to ruin such a great friendship that we had built together. You know usually on these type of dating reality shows, things never tend to work out in the end because it gets all weird and awkward between 2 lovers….and so that is why I did not choose Dani as my lover, but as my closest friend. This way we would never have to “END” things between us. Also the fact that Dani is doing quite well for many reasons and I am happy for her:



1) She’s really famous now


2) The world loves her


3) She’s getting more girls throwing themselves at her then ever before in her life


4) She’s really famous now



Ok so there you have it. Everyone wins……except for me I guess….I think I found love, and then the world bashes me for putting out my feelings.

Yeah, totally; I know how usually things never tend to work out in the end and everyone wins and then the world bashes me. Wait, what? I think I’d rather quote the comments of AfterEllen.com readers in the forums, especially these:

Dani is so much more real, and so much hotter than Bobby. Dani’s better off anyway; Tila looked like a Bratz doll. — Journey_Wmn

Tila would have just held her back. — Tiffany

I can’t believe YOU GUYS LET ME WATCH THIS SHOW!!!! — Blasianbeatanik

I can’t either! But there was just something irresistible about Dani Campbell, that futch firefighter with the heart of gold. During the finale, Dani proved she could have a hip-hop career if the firefighting thing doesn’t work out.



How hot was that? That’s why I’m glad she “lost”: because now Dani can come back to her people. And date. A lot. (Maybe she’ll even dip into the AfterEllen.com pool of brainy hotties.) Congrats to you, Dani, for keeping your cool throughout that entire mess. We wish you and your clothing line all the best in 2008! Just don’t make a guest appearance on Domenico’s show, or we’ll never forgive you.

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