Best. Lesbian. Holiday. Ever.

 
 

EVEN THE GRINCH IS GREEN
Now that green is the new black, environmentally conscious queer women no longer need to keep their Earth-saving habits in the closet.

For the eco-minded dyke, pick up a Countertop Bag Dryer ($19) to help her maintain a clean, clutter-free kitchen space. Not only does it prevent the annoying mess of wet plastic bags hanging all over the kitchen while they dry out for reuse, it’s made from sustainably harvested ash and birch woods and folds easily for storage.

To further prove your devotion to Mother Earth, give your friends a Global Warming Action Kit ($99), which prevents the production of 10,000 pounds of carbon dioxide emissions. The kit comes complete with three energy-efficient light bulbs, a 20-oz. stainless steel water bottle (you know about the horrors of plastic, don’t you?), a low-flow showerhead and the Solar Living Sourcebook from Real Goods to give you the 411 on how you too can harness the sun’s energy for your own benefit.

You don’t have to wait for a sunny day to save the earth, though. For the demented dedicated eco-freak in your life, get the Sun-Mar Composting Toilet ($1,349 and up).

Sustainable, off-the-grid lesbian commune not included.

STOCKING STUFFERS
Still don’t know what you should get your close acquaintances/holiday fling/recent ex-girlfriend? Celebrate the primary season with a Hillary Nutcracker ($24.99). Her stainless steel thighs (clothed in a power lesbian pantsuit) will make quick work of all those, uh, nuts.

Fans of lesploitation movies — or just their posters — will love the 2008 Dykesploitation Wall Calendar ($18.49). Created by filmmaker and critic Jenni Olson, the calendar includes classic (and often topless) posters from Chained Girls, The Sinners, That Tender Touch and more.

For any dyke who’s considering the time-honored lesbian tradition of getting a tattoo, pick up this Temporary Tattoo Kit ($12), which contains 100 retro-style tats, along with an applicator sponge.

As the catalog copy reads, "All of the street cred, none of the pain" — a motto worth living by. Happy holidays!

Written by Karman Kregloe (T-shirts, accessories, jeans), Malinda Lo (DVDs, music, housewares, green, stocking stuffers) and scribegrrrl (games, events, theater, geeks).

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