The library â€” Nikki is reading Henry James' The Portrait of a Lady. Someone sneaks up behind her and interrupts.
Helen: [looking at the book] That's a bit heavy going for a no-hoper like you.
Nikki: What're you doing here?!
Helen: One of those irons in the fire I was telling you about.
Nikki: You … you got a job here?
Helen: Prison Service Professional.
Helen: I'm working for area management. Special program for women lifers. I'm back on your case. Literally.
They giggle and gaze at each other, but what's really funny is the fact that they had to do this scene like a kazillion times, and it's still a little awkward despite all the takes. (Check out the DVD extras on our Video Picks page.)
And yes, Helen's doing that adorable tongue thing again!
Welcome back â€” Dominic welcomes Shell back on the wing. She seems sorry and like she really wants to make a change, but it's hard to think she's anything but doomed.
Getting the facts â€” Karen asks Sylvia how she's doing. She says her Bobby doesn't think she should be going to work, but what can you do?
Karen: Is Bobby your partner?
Sylvia: He's my husband!
Karen: No, I mean your dancing partner.
Karen shows Sylvia the clipping, and Sylvia tries to explain herself.
Karen: Don't dig yourself in deeper, Sylvia. I don't like liars, and I don't like skivers. One more slip. I did think four weeks' training would be enough; I'm extending it to three months now. And if I see you in that neck brace again, I'm gonna rip it off and stick it where the sun don't shine!
Aw, yeah! Will we get to keep Karen and have Helen back too? That would be the best of both Hot Gov worlds.
Tarting up â€” The two Julies offer to give Zandra a makeover. They say they should make Crystal over too, and then they get inquisitive about Crystal's sexual history â€” specifically, whether she has one.
Crystal: Is that all you two can think about?
The Julies: Thought not.
Crystal says she's proud of her virginity, which makes everyone chuckle.
But then Denny screams: Up on the next floor, Shell is looking like something out of a horror movie again. This time she's white as a ghost and has a makeshift noose around her neck.
Shell: Come on, Mr. Fenner. Why don't you string me up like Rachel Hicks? It's what you want, i'n't it?
Eek. I'm not going to sleep well tonight. Between deranged Shell and delicious Helen, my dreams will be interesting indeed!
NEXT TIME ON BAD GIRLS: Helen really is back; so is Yvonne.