Last Friday, one billion people tuned in to watch the Olympic opening ceremonies. One billion. That is 15 percent of the world’s population!
Ever since I was a child I have been an Olympics junkie — one of those people who gets up at three a.m. to watch the USA women’s basketball team live. I love it all: the events, the medal ceremonies, the musical montages, the athletes who have trained their entire lives for a 9.7 second sprint. I love that look an athlete gets at the very second she wins or loses; it’s the most raw emotion in the world.
This year, the PR firms for various athletes have one goal in mind: they want us to see past the athleticism to the fact that these are — hang on, I’m going to quote the press release — “very sexy and beautiful people.”
So, if you, like me, are glued to your television for the next two weeks, I admonish you: while you’re thinking of these Olympians as athletes, try also to think of them as sexy. I know it will be hard.
When watching softball, don’t simply admire the 6-4-3 double play: allow yourself to think, “Nice smile!”
When watching swimming, don’t concentrate only on the backstroke technique: consider the biceps!
When watching basketball, don’t focus solely on Lisa Leslie‘s vertical: enjoy her forearms!
When watching field hockey, don’t spend the entire time looking up the rules on the internet: consider some triceps!
When watching beach volleyball, think past the standard set-and-spike coaching, and take in the tall, toned, half-naked, sweaty —
Um, I’m sorry, what was I saying?
Oh, right: I love the Olympics!