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Bette and Tina were kind of sadly eyeing each other during that little speech, and it's nice to see them smiling together again. God, I'm such an idiot.

As the "best man," Alice presents the gift from the bride-to-be. The gift is a... show, I guess you could call it. Certainly a spectacle. It's a hip-hop duo, God-des and She, and they are sharing the "prescription to a happy marriage." The song is called "Pussy 101," and it's mildly amusing at first, but it quickly becomes ha-ha, very funny, aren't you clever.

Well, they're all kind of enjoying it, I guess. Peggy tries to get into it a little. Helena makes a face when they explain what to do when your jaw locks, and Bette puts a hand over her eyes at one point. Angus looks like he's thinking "I already know all of this."

After the spectacle, Bette and Tina go back to their rooms, and as they talk, there are a few looks on Tina's face that suggest she hasn't forgotten how good it can be to be with Bette.

Bette: "Tina, it was a really nice night. It felt really good to be together and getting along. She really loved the sleigh ride... so did I."
Tina: "That's what I hope for us, Bette. We're a family. And I hope we can do family things together. I think that's what would be best for Angelica. And maybe one day, when we're ready, we can take vacations together."
Bette: "I'd really like that."

Bette pulls Tina into a good night hug, and Tina seems to breathe Bette in. Bette and Angelica go into their room, but not before Bette casts a wondering look at Tina. But Tina is afraid to look back. She might turn into a pillar of salt, or perhaps into the character we used to know and love.

Inside the room, Bette calls Joyce. She leaves her a voice mail: she's had a change of heart and doesn't want to pursue sole custody. The ominous music says DOOM DOOM DOOM (at least the poltergeist isn't there to actually say it).

Elsewhere in the doom hotel, Alice knocks on Lara's door. One thing I know about the soup chef: she does know how to answer a door. They kiss, and I like it. But then it gets tricky.

Alice: [whispering cutely] "Can I come in?"
Lara: "Yeah. But... um... I think we should talk."
Alice: "What do you want to talk about?"
Lara: "What's happening between us. How you're feeling. How I'm feeling."
Alice: "I don't... I don't wanna talk. I don't wanna talk."

So she leaves.

Somebody else doesn't wanna talk either: Shane knocks on Carmen's door, wanting to show her everything she learned from the Pussy 101 song. But Carmen says it's against the rules.

Daddy-O and Carla saunter down the hall in time to see Shane and Carmen making out in the hotel doorway. "I hope that's Carmen," jokes Daddy-O. Ha, ha. They all introduce themselves, and Gabe is very nice to Carmen. Carla and Carmen (hmm, what a coincidence) say they want to get some sleep, so Shane and Daddy-O decide to have a drink. They kiss their women goodnight, and then hold hands as they walk down the hall. Look, I know Shane has been feeling the lack of a family for a while now, but this is just weird. She doesn't know thing one about Daddy-O, really, and she's acting like a little kid.

The great outdoors — Gabe and Carla don't want to go skiing. Helena makes a big show of telling them that if there's anything they need, they should just talk to her. Gabe seems impressed.

Somewhere up in the mountains, at the launching point for a zip line, Alice talks to the lay minister — make that "marriage commissioner" — who will be marrying Shane and Carmen. Turns out this minister has a past: her name is Marilyn, a.k.a. Overwhelmed Girl in the recap for episode 3.01. But the woman at the Palo Alto encounter group wasn't the first woman Marilyn slept with: that honor went to a "fabulous, beautiful, arrogant" heiress who later flew off to London and married a man. Sound like someone we know and love?

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