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The happy home — Wilson and Jun Ying eat dinner while Winnie and Bette continue to scheme about Helena. Well, Bette is actually kinda hanging back a bit, to her credit. Winnie is trying to seem all downtrodden and victimized, but I'm starting to think she's just sort of a low-rent version of Helena, and there's a reason they ended up together in the first place. But if I say that, I have to start wondering about Tina, so never mind.

Anyway, those kids are starting to seem like pawns — no wonder they like Bette so much. She gives them ice cream while Winnie gives her a piece of advice: apparently Helena can't stand it when people don't react to her machinations and manipulations. I suspect Bette can do that not-reacting thing very, very well, especially if she's wearing a tanktop at the time.

A film fest — Carmen and Jenny are watching a bunch of Burr Connor films so Jenny can prepare to be the guy's ghost writer. Actually, Jenny and Carmen are sort of making out on the couch with the TV on, until Mark comes in and makes them talk to him. He thinks Burr is so tough and cool, but Jenny calls it all "sentimental claptrap" that allows men to explore the kinds of things you see in chick flicks.

Say "claptrap" again, Jenny. It was cute.

Carmen is all cuddly with Jenny until Mark mentions Shane. Then she gets all frosty and fidgety.

Did I say Jenny was being cute? I suppose I shouldn't admit that I also don't hate Mark as he tosses out the names of chick flicks that he considers sentimental claptrap. When he says "Sixteen Candles," Jenny counters with "Dukes of Hazzard." I start singing "Just the good old boys" and revel in the memory of a theme song that doesn't suck.

Speaking of things that suck — Shane is at church. Confessing. You know, all the stuff that ruins a life: she used to live in a church shelter; she ran away from her foster family; her real mom was a drug addict; everybody wants sex and she doesn't have anything left to give.

Okay. We get it. Shane is broken. Did you leave anything out? What about some time in juvy or a girl gang? Is she going to start singing "It's the Hard Knock Life" or (worse) something from RENT? We must leave no cliché unturned.

Grooming — Dana's handing Alice a towel as Alice steps out of the shower. Sweet, but next time could you fling the curtain wide first, and taunt her a little? You know, make her jump for the towel or something. Thanks. Hey, why is there such a sloshing noise as Alice gets out — do you two need me to come snake out the drain? We can re-enact the "I need a plumber" scene from Bound.

But Dana's not feeling playful: she's just noticed that she has a huge hickey on her shoulder.

Alice: "Oh, yeah. I thought that would go away."
Dana: "You knew you did this to me?"
Alice: "Well, I wasn't doing it on purpose. You bruise easy."
Dana: "I'm not the only one."

Alice turns to the mirror to discover two big hickeys on her neck. They bicker about who's most affected: Alice says she needs to make an impression at her interview, but Dana points out that "it's radio" and that she, on the other hand, has a photo shoot with Women's Fitness. I am trying really, really hard to listen to the dialogue, but I'm distracted again because Dana is peeing while she and Alice squabble, and then she doesn't even wash her hands afterwards. Boundaries! Hygiene! Ew!

But it ends well:

Alice: "Is there any more?"
Dana: "Yeah." [leaving]
Alice: "Where?" [twisting in front of the mirror to look for hickeys]

Let me help you with that, Alice.

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