Based on title alone, I have already decided that this will be my favorite episode of the season and maybe of all time. The models as Vargas girls? My TiVo is quivering with anticipation.

The girls are back at Chez Model, sulking over Coryn’s elimination. She was their designated Put-Lisa-in-Her-Place-er and now she is gone. Sigh. Back to whispering about Lisa behind her back again.

Jayla is still yammering about Nik’s inherent evil and immaturity. Lisa is probably off having a cocktail.

The next day, Tyra shows up for an impromptu photo shoot. She is wants to use black and white film in an outdoor setting to capture the girls looking wild and raw.
Bre is excited. “I don’t know about the rest of them, but I signed up to work with Tyra!”
And Bre gets her wish because Tyra is directing the shoot, applying their minimalist make-up and styling their hair. See, this is why I always wish Tyra could win this thing. She IS every woman!

Nik tells us that she really wants to focus and get back into the game. So she poses with a fierce and dangerous-looking fern.

Tyra gives Jayla dark eyes and tells her “Look like ‘I’m a baby, I’m a virgin.’” Maybe Jayla has different definitions of those terms due to her strict religious upbringing, but she whips around and gives a really mean and nasty look-- the likes of which I have not seen since Shannen Doherty glared at me when I checked her out in the parking lot at El Floridita in Hollywood. (It was one of the greatest moments of my life.)

Tyra is a great director, and it’s a good thing because some of these girls are struggling. Kim admits, “I know that my face and my look is high fashion, but when it comes to just playing feminine, that’s a little bit harder for me.”

Tyra is pleased with the final results, and tells her photographer, “This photo shoot was short and sweet and cute. It don’t take all the hoopla!”

When the Tyra Mail arrives that night, Nicole reads it aloud and lies “You are going to Paris tomorrow!” The girls start to shriek and it quickly descends into a dolphin-ear piercing scream-off between Lisa and Nicole. Then Nicole admits that she lied and that they are not going to Paris. The Tyra Mail actually contains only the question, “Are you a diamond in the rough?’

The girls go back to their rooms to stop the bleeding in their eardrums. Kyle tells us, “Everyone is going crazy here. Me and Kim always say that we’re the only sane ones left.” Interesting. It seems that Kyle and Kim are “clicking” (remember, Kyle used to be a blonde, and Kim admits that she “clicks” with the blonde girls).

Kyle admits to Kim that she has planned her life around her boyfriend (cut to video of non-threatening guy in a baggy sweatshirt, waving lamely at the camera), and Kim adamantly tells her, “That is NOT ok.” While I agree with Kim, I wonder if she might have an ulterior motive.

Cut to Jayla “To win this competition you have to be a smart person. And you can’t just feed off of what other people say. Kyle does not seem like the kind of person that is very intelligent.” (Cut to Jayla sneaking up the steps like a spider to eavesdrop on the Kim/Kyle conversation.)