My own family mostly. I also wanted to explore a relationship between two women who had been together for some time in an established relationship.

I often found myself sharing my own story with others and seeing them respond, and try to understand what I was going through, made me realize that sharing part of something that is incredibly universal – the struggle to be part of a family - well, one day it occurred to me that maybe I should put some of my own stuff up there on screen. Not all of it! My story was a hundred times worse than what you see in Treading Water.

I hope my family isn’t reading this...

What was it like working with Nina Landey and Angie Redman? Why did you cast them?

It was an amazing experience working with the two of them. I learned a great deal about myself as a director and it was inspiring to watch the transformation in the two of them. I know with Casey she had never thought about or experienced any of the things her character was feeling and it was a tribute to her as an actor to watch her delve into the process of finding this woman. She literally lived as Casey for months. In fact, I had trouble calling her “Angie” by the end of the shoot. She was Casey Olsen.

I cast Nina and Angie because there was a spark between them from the moment they walked into the room. We had looked at hundreds of women and were less than two months away from shooting and I still had not found my two leads. They walked in to audition and read together and blew us away. There was no question that they were Casey and Alex from that moment on.

What would you say to viewers who were looking for a happier ending to the film?

Sorry.

No seriously, life just doesn’t always work that way. But I am working on this. I have been accused on more than one occasion of being a bit of a pessimist. My next film is potentially a romantic comedy. How’s that for a shift?

What was it like trying to make and market a lesbian-themed film?

There is really a built in audience with the gay and lesbian festival circuit and market in general. This is good. I was lucky enough to be approached early on by the top gay distributor of films today, Wolfe Video. The film was launched on December 5 and has been sighted at every major video store in the country. I am thrilled with this. I do wish we could have gotten a theatrical release though. It’s very impactful to sit with an audience and watch this film.

I really wanted treading water to be a movie that had something in it for everybody. I know when I saw it screen at mainstream festivals like Seattle International or the Mill Valley Film Festival in Northern California, it was amazing to see the overwhelming response to the film from young men to grandmothers to straight women. I have always wanted my films to go beyond the gay and lesbian market. It’s so important for America to see gay and lesbian faces on screen. I feel very strongly about this.

How did making the film impact your career? Any plans on making a lesbian-themed movie again?

We shall see when I start to shop my next project around and look for funding. I hope potential backers can recognize that I have a strong grasp on the craft of filmmaking, and certainly, directing actors.

I will surely include a lesbian character in one of my next films.

Looking back on Treading Water now, how do you view your experience making the film? Has your perspective on the movie changed over time?

It’s so hard to do this kind of work because you are always looking back really. When I started making Treading Water I was 27. Now I feel like I’m 67 (okay maybe 37). From the inception of the project to the end of the line it was about 3-4 years. That’s a long time. Another 2 years on the festival circuit and dealing with distribution elements. That’s a really long time.

I have struggled to continue to stand behind the film at times because I know if I could go back now and do it again, it would be so much stronger. That’s the nature of this kind of work. When you are a filmmaker you really only get one shot at it and that is truly a unique situation as an artist. When you are a painter you can go out and buy another canvas and apply what you learned from the first attempt. treading water was a $300,000 canvas. I have a hard time with that. I wish it didn’t have to be so hard.

What has been the most unexpected consequence of making Treading Water?

I’m still speaking to my family.

I saw the end of the most significant relationship of my life.

Page 2 - Himmel talks about her current projects, the role of independent films in lesbian/bisexual visibility, and her take on the current state of lesbian and bisexual women in entertainment