Page 1 / 2 / 3 / 4 / 5 / 6 / 7 / 8 / 9 / 10 / 11 - Next

Noel decides to change the subject. I wish I could just summarize it instead of transcribing, but I don't really know what the hell they're talking about:

Noel: So, is this where you hang?
Claire: I never hang.
Noel: No, I suppose you don't. What do you do?
Claire: Oh, I don't think it's any big mystery, doc. It's probably the same thing you do.
Noel: I somehow doubt that.
Claire: Different tools, same game.
Noel: It isn't.
Claire: Isn't it?
Noel: The attraction between men and women is clear.
Claire: And between women and women?
Noel: It can weave. Dangerously. Simply forever.

The whole thing sounds like a bad translation, or maybe a commercial for diamond jewelry or an obscure liqueur. But it seems to impress Claire. She gives Noel a smoldering look, but the fire is quickly quenched by the arrival of Tara and the other writers.

Small talk — And what do women talk about when they get together for drinks? Men, apparently. Specifically, penis size. Or, as Tara says, “crotch bulge.” Yeah, it's kind of grim. The look on Noel's face agrees with me, but she tries to play it cool:

Tara: Why, darlin', you look a tad blanched. All this girl talk make you uncomfortable?
Noel: Why should it? I am a girl.

Claire seems to appreciate this. But again her blossoming fondness for Noel is interrupted, this time by that pretty boy she slept with during the first writers' trash meet. Noel gets a little jealous and disappears, saying to Claire on the way out, “I'm sure you'll have no problem finding your way back.”

Another morning after — Claire, in her robe, finds Noel out on the porch. She thinks Noel hates men. But of course Noel says she doesn't; she just couldn't see any point in staying. Claire jumps right to the real question:

Claire: What is it?
Noel: What?
Claire: That makes you what you are.
Noel: I'm not exactly sure.

It might seem like Claire's being vague, but we all know what she's talking about: What makes Noel wear those fugly sweaters and owl-like glasses?

Oh, my mistake: They're talking about <whisper> being gay </whisper>. Noel thinks maybe it's just a roll of the dice. Yes: The gods may throw the dice, their minds as cold as ice, and someone way down here ends up watching a bad lesbian movie and cursing her fate.

Speaking of rolling the dice — Claire and Noel have moved inside to play backgammon and sit on the stripy couch. Claire wants to know when Noel knew. You know, about the gay thing.

Noel: Isn't that a little personal?
Claire: I thought that was your métier.

Métier. To that, I can only say quelle dommage. Hey, maybe there's a drinking game in this: every time you hear a French phrase or word, take a swig. You could also drink every time someone in the movie drinks a nonalcoholic drink — not every time someone drinks alcohol, because that would kill you.

Noel tells her story: She had a patient; someone she kissed. She was 27. Ethics much?

Noel: I never knew a thing about myself until that kiss. Never knew want until that kiss, or how it felt to be utterly aroused. Never understood any of it until that moment.

As Noel talks, Claire seems to get aroused, or to have trouble breathing. It's dramatic. And erotic.

Page 1 / 2 / 3 / 4 / 5 / 6 / 7 / 8 / 9 / 10 / 11 - Next