AfterEllen.com Huddle: I am 32 flavors and then some

What’s your flavor? Tell me what’s your flavor? It’s the old “If you were any flavor of ice cream, what flavor would you be?” Only the important questions here, folks.

Lucy Hallowell: I would be a Klondyke Bar because you can’t beat that name. Hopefully that conjures images in your head of the love child between the Brawny paper towel guy and Yukon Cornelius because that’s exactly what I look like (not at all). When I told my wife what I picked she was like, “That’s actually perfect — hard outer shell that’s actually pretty thin and all mushy inside.” Whatever, what does she know?

Emily Donofrio: This is a lot of pressure and totally open to interpretation and what if someone doesn’t like my flavor? I guess that’s just the real life parallel, not everyone will like you always. I think I’m Neopolitan, dissect that as you will, peanut gallery.

Trish Bendix: If it’s true that you are what you eat, then I am peanut butter. I’d eat me!

Marcie Bianco: I’d be mint chocolate chip ice cream: Cool but sweet, classic and
classy but not predictable. (Oh, a chip!)

Karman Kregloe: Pralines & Cream, because I like to think of myself as a decadent Southern delicacy.

Erika Star: I’m just going to pretend this flavor is the real deal, because I challenge anyone to prove a more actualized version of Liz Lemon than myself. See also: Lizbianisms and snacks.

The Linster: I don’t know if it still exists, but Cold Stone Creamery used to have a flavor called “The Pie Who Loved Me.” It had Oreos and cheesecake and fudge and pie crust — basically a freelance writer’s diet. With a little vodka on top, of course.

Mia Jones: Is there a whiskey or tequila-infused ice cream? That sounds terrible but that’s probably what I’d be.

Bridget McManus: Since I’m lactose intolerant and trying to be vegan, I would say that I am a chocolate non-dairy frozen dessert made with coconut milk. I’m not one to shy away from fat and rich flavor but my frozen dessert has a secret, it’s cow teat-free.

Dorothy Snarker: Since I can’t eat ice cream (lactose intolerance, what), I pick bacon instead. Because it too is delicious and can be eaten on stick or with chocolate.

Ali Davis: I’m Karamel Sutra: a little odd and not the first thing anyone grabs. But there’s something fun at the core if you’re willing to do the work. Also you should probably sprinkle some Nerds on top.

Dara Nai: Like anyone who has ever recapped a show, I am Snarky Road: Super caffeinated espresso ice cream with bitter coffee beans and crushed nuts, over bananas, eaten at 4:00 AM, and immediately regretted.

Heather Hogan: If I were an icy summertime treat, I would be this one.

OK, not really. But it’s the summertime treat I most want to makeout with. (Thanks to The Mary Sue for the art!)

What kind of ice cream flavor would you be?

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