Hex Episode 3 (24 October 2004)

Summary:

• Thelma's cowboy boots steal the show
• Earwigs are apparently the equivalent of unprotected sex.
• We are introduced to Cassie's nutter of a mother, who gives her scary supernatural presents.

A bar – Cassie and Troy are playing pool, the only thing they seem to do. We see Cassie use her powers to make her balls go into the holes, while she unsubtly sticks her hand down the hole to stop Troy from winning. Afterwards, Troy asks Cassie not to tell anyone she beat him, to which she replies that his friends won't care about that, since 'for a start, they think I'm into women.' Troy says he doesn't care what his friends think; he just wants to be with her yadda yadda. Troy is obviously meant to be the popular kid who feels out of place. Oh, joy.

Afterwards, as they smooch in his heated-seat car, Troy shows Cassie the greatness that is reclining seats. Thelma, thankfully, saves us from any more groping by popping up in the back of the car, gesturing wildly and telling Cassie to stop--while also hinting that Troy is very 'small'. Cassie, in retaliation, gives Thelma the finger and tells her to piss off, but finally gives in and stops.

Dorm room – Cassie tells Thelma off, saying that she made her look like an idiot in front of Troy, etc, and starts giving out some 'ground rules' that we doubt will be of any use whatsoever.

Cassie: …Don't watch me get dressed…
Thelma: [Cutting in] I always did that!

Finally Thelma stops Cassie mid-flow and tells her what we all found out at the end of last week's episode--that Cassie is a McBain. How Cassie did not know her own father's surname is not explained, and Cassie looks dumbstruck.

Mental Institute – Cassie is there to visit someone (we find out it is her mother), and obviously does not want to. When she eventually goes into her mother's room, it's incredibly uncomfortable. The tension, not the room. (The latter of which is rather nice. Maybe I should go crazy.) We learn that Cassie's mother "totally freaked out" when Cassie tried to find her father when she was younger, and Cassie says she now understands why – but she doesn't understand why her mother sent her to Medlham if she wanted to protect her, and thinks that her mother wanted this business with Azazeal to happen. Her mother, echoing Azazeal's words, but also informing us that Cassie is a witch, says, 'You are a McBain. You are descended from a family of witches. There is nothing you can do…don't fight him."

Completely unhelpful, Cassie looks at her like she would rather go around the bend than not fight Azazeal. Or maybe she will go crazy if she doesn't fight him, as it certainly seems like that is what
happened to Mrs McBain.

Dorm room – we see old pictures of Cassie's mother and of Cassie at the beach, and then Cassie looking at them, crying. Thelma comes in and Cassie says she "stubbed her toe," although Thelma, the local friendly ghost, knows different.

Thelma: 'You've had a really hard time, Cassie McBain. Your dad disappeared; your mum's a nutter...' .'
Cassie: '…My best friend is a lesbian ghost.'

Thelma says that she thinks she irritates and bores Cassie, and that Cassie doesn't want her around, and that she wonders what it will be like in ten years. Cassie apologises, and tries to cheer Thelma up.

Cassie: 'You might meet someone.'
Thelma: 'Settle down with a couple of supernatural cats?!'

Thelma then says she misses Cassie, and asks her if she misses her too. Cassie tells her she misses her 'only when I run out of batteries', and they air kiss. Ghost-angst indeed.

Dorm room, later – Thelma watches over Cassie while drinking a carton of juice. Bored, we see Thelma rifling through Cassie's stuff, and finding more drawings of Azazeal. Meanwhile, Cassie is having dreams about Esther and Azazeal, and more flashbacks of Esther being hanged. Cassie wakes up, shocked, and Thelma is instantly on alert.

Thelma: 'I wasn't in your dreams, I swear!'
Cassie: 'I know, they weren't that scary.'

They then talk about Esther, and Thelma tells Cassie she thinks that what happened to her will happen to Cassie. Just as long as Cassie doesn't have to have scary fingers, I am sure she and heated-seat boy will be fine.

Common room – the popular kids are talking about hiring a boat, and generally being stupid. Troy looks over at Cassie, and she walks out and sits outside. We see the headmaster come and join her on the bench, and talk about Thelma's memorial service,

Head: 'I thought it was very moving.'
Cassie: 'I thought it was sycophantic nonsense.'

They look out at the scenery, Cassie engrossed by the tree that Esther was hung from. The Head tells her it had a gruesome past, and that he should write an Agatha Christie-like novel about it. We learn that Jo, the English teacher, thinks that Cassie is 'going off the rails'. David, the head, then gives out another pearl of wisdom, telling Cassie that "In the end, you have to take responsibility for your own mind." He's like a bald Gandalf. Or a smartly-dressed Yoda.

Troy's room – Troy is preening his hair in the mirror ("for the good of mankind" apparently), while standing half-naked. We see Cassie come in and watch bemusedly, then apologise for being so weird before. Troy is understanding - the writers obviously trying to make him practically flawless apart from his incessant vanity. Troy says he was hoping that he could have both Cassie and Gemma, and jokingly tackles her to the bed. Giggling and smooching ensue.

Hallway, night – Jo, the horny English teacher, is flirting on the phone (with Cassie, in my imagination) while locking up the school. We hear her say "I will be there in 15 minutes"– surely the head's office is not that far away? (If our suspicions that she is talking with the head are right, that is.) Azazeal then steps out into the corridor behind her, looking smug, probably about the fact that locks don't bother him, being a fallen angel and all. I have the distinct impression that he should wave his arms around and stick his tongue out at Jo's back, but, unfortunately, he doesn't.

Dorm room – Thelma is praising food, and talking about looking after Cassie. We see Cassie tentatively bring up the subject of Troy, and make Thelma say she's "cool with it" (with the relationship, or with the date. Either way, Thelma is obviously not.) Thelma, however, says
that she thinks she "would have been good enough." Viewers around the country sigh with the fact that the writers did not even get to explore the goodness that could have been. (Me, bitter?) Meanwhile, Azazeal is listening just outside their door.

Boy's dorm – Azazeal does what he does best: lurks. Troy, unsurprisingly, is not doing what he does best (pool), and is instead sleeping. We see Azazeal produce a dagger from his pocket, cut his hand, and put a wormy earwig thing on the cut, and then in Troy's ear. We then see a lump go down Troy's spine. Ew.

Gardens – Cassie and Thelma walk along, to be joined by Jo who tells Cassie that her mother phoned, and is "in a state." I just hope that it wasn't Cassie's mother she was talking to last night, because then that would be twisted.

Mental hospital – Cassie's mother gives her a blue pendant meant to protect her, and makes Cassie promise to always wear it. I would like to add here that the mother is played beautifully, and after Cassie leaves, we see her crying on her bed, to be joined by Azazeal. We find out that Cassie's mother just gave Cassie the necklace because Azazeal told her to, and doesn't even know what it does, but makes Azazeal tell her. It is meant to stop Cassie from seeing the possessed (as the crazy lager boy was at the beginning of last week's episode), which can't be good, especially as Azazeal has endorsed it. Azazeal then kisses Cassie's mother's ear lecherously.

Dorm room – Thelma thinks the pendant is a "bit bling," and Cassie thinks that an Uzi would have been more help. (Against a fallen angel? Think again Cassie – you are meant to be like Buffy!) Thelma, however, persuades Cassie to wear it, while Thelma herself wears a dressing-up mask. The directors attempt at symbolism, maybe?

Dining room/stairs – Roxanne looks at a stick of celery, and says she cannot remember the last time she had fish and chips. Leon, ever insightful and intelligent, says what he needs is a "faggot in gravy." Nice. Leon is rude about Cassie, and Thelma (who is lurking near by), sees Troy stomp off, and Leon follow him. When they get to the obligatory Dark Corridor, Troy pushes Leon up
against the wall, threatening to kill him. Thelma looks on aghast, and sees that Troy's eyes are bloodshot, a sign of possession. (Or alcoholism, maybe.)

Dorm room – Cassie is trying on jackets, and we see Thelma come in and try and persuade her from not going on her date with Troy, telling Cassie that Troy is possessed. Cassie doesn't believe her, and says rather harshly, "I'm sick of your jealousy. Get it into your head, I don't want you." Thelma then makes Cassie wear the necklace. Oh, the irony.

Car – Troy and Cassie smile at each other, sickly sweet, and we can see that Troy's eyes are, indeed "manky" (as Thelma put it.) Cassie, however, notices nothing.

Dining room – Thelma eats desolately, looking worried in her newly-appointed guardian angel status.

Posh restaurant – Troy and Cassie talk about Cassie's mum, and how Troy remembers that Cassie was wearing a Grateful Dead t-shirt the day she came to Medlham. Cassie, embarrassed, groans, and Troy tells her that it wasn't as bad as him wanting to be Michael Jackson when he was younger. No wonder it was so easy for him to get possessed.

Dining room of gloom, again – Thelma walks along the table in her cool red cowboy boots. I know it's not exactly breath-taking, but if this is the only storyline she is going to get--"she eats, she discovers, she helps"--then I am going to recap everything I can.

Car of heated reclining seats – Troy looks evil and asks Cassie if she wants to go for a walk, saying he can't stand Leon yet. I am surprised Mr Sensitive can stand Leon at all.

Dining room – Thelma is now lying on one of the tables, surrounded by sweet wrappers. Her spider-senses must tingle, because she then notices something behind a statue, where the light through some stained-glass windows is shining. We can see it is a painting or mural of some sort, which depicts a woman in the arms of a bull, and with Cassie's necklace around her neck. Thelma, obviously working out what the pendant was for, runs out into the grounds, looking for Cassie.

The slave house – Cassie and Troy are undressing and smooching on a dusty table, which is not very hygienic. By the time Thelma sneaks into the slave house, they have redressed, while looking coyly at each other. Troy gets up to leave, and feels compelled to look at himself in the cracked mirror in the room. We, and Thelma, see that his eyes are back to normal. However, when Cassie gets up to leave, and picks up the light, we see that it's now Cassie that has been infected. (A
metaphor for unprotected sex, maybe?)

Next week – Will manky-eyed Cassie turn evil? Will erotic-fiction writing Jo survive another episode? Will Troy stop looking at himself in the mirror? Will Thelma ever get a decent storyline?

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