"Cashmere Mafia" Recaps: Episode 1.7 "Dog Eat Dog"

Previously on — They say winners never quit and quitters never win. Well, they never met these girls. When we last saw them, Zoe had quit her high-powered job after she smacked her noggin on the glass ceiling. Juliet quit holding out hope for an amicable divorce. Mia quit holding onto the idea that Jack someday would accept her awesomeness for what it is. And then there's Caitlin.

Alicia took one look at Caitlin's enormous, hopeful brown eyes and thought to herself, "I wish I could quit you." And her wish came true: She dumped Caitlin to run back to her nutty ex so they could have their stupid baby together.

Alicia didn't deserve Caitlin or any of the toys Caitlin bought for her spawn. It may not feel like it right now, but Caitlin, honey, you dodged a bullet.

Personal best — It's a crisp, autumnal day in New York City. The sweet aroma of honey-roasted peanuts mingles with the scent of burning chestnuts and the bready goodness of giant, warm pretzels, wafting from the food carts on every other corner. Or so I remember.

In reality, wind whips through the canyons of Wall Street and Midtown, sandblasting your face with street dirt. People sneeze their cold germs in your face on the subway, and when you walk into a store or restaurant, your hair is subjected to a downward blast of hot air from the establishment's heater, which feels exactly like going through the last phase of a car wash. On the upside, the smell of urine is way down from the all-time highs of summer.

Mia and Jason are out for a run. Mia is sporting her Chinese poodle running jacket from Title Nine.

Making everything into a competition is second nature to our magazine mogul, but Jason has legs twice and long and a more aerodynamic hat, thank you very much. He passes her up, even though it nearly kills him to do so. Mia jokes that if only she had more than five hours' sleep, then they'd see who the real champ is. I'd rather watch Chris Cahill run up a sand dune, to be honest.

Mia tries to make a date for breakfast, but Jason has no time when brains are waiting to be diagnosed as normal or abby normal. He suggests that Mia come for lunch at the hospital cafeteria. Partitioned trays, plastic sporks and stale Jell-O — always a good time. Too bad it's too cold for Mia to wear a skort. With a tankini. She passes on his tempting offer, and they agree on a time they're both free: o'dark thirty.

Free time — Meanwhile, Zoe is at home getting used to being unemployed. Still in her jammies, she's thinking she needs to get the kiddies ready for school and make lunches, but that's what their manny, Adam, is for. Eric has his job as an architect so they can keep paying for the help they no longer need, so he's out the door. Zoe stares at herself in the mirror, wondering who got her office.

Consultant is just another word for unemployed — Later, after she's leisurely read the New York Times front to back, watched the Today Show, done some yoga, and Googled herself for the hell of it, Zoe finally leaves the house to walk with Juliet and give financial insights on Juliet's current sitch: A corporate raider billionaire named Len Dinerstein has purchased a suspiciously large chunk of stock in Juliet's hotel company, and what does it all mean?