Basically the show is based on unfortunate experiences in my life and the pursuit of love. And the confusion of love with sex, lust and dysfunction. I had this relationship/affair/one month hostage situation with a suburban housewife in New Jersey who I met in the role of my profession as a professional Pride emcee. She was a volunteer who picked me up at the train station and brought me to New Jersey Pride. There really is a New Jersey Pride. Oh, we better strike that ’cause there’s people from New Jersey reading this. New Jersey has a wonderful Pride.

So what ensued after that is a crazy…one month relationship I had with this woman who was actually a bisexual sociopathic medicated chick. And she was just one in a string of sociopathic bisexual medicated chicks I had been involved with in a few years. And what I learned is that sociopathic bisexual medicated chicks are so HOT. The other thing I learned in the show is don’t date married women.

AE: Yeah! (laughs) So what does winning a GLAAD award entail?
MG: Well, you have to, they do sort of a spanking mill and then body shots with a…

AE: Sharon Stone?
MG: No, with Chastity Bono (laughs). No, I have no idea. I’ve never even seen the award but I know that I’ve won it. In fact I called them and they said that “um, oh you want your award?” It’s like, “Yeah, I’d like my award!” Nobody even called me. My friend told me she saw it; it was like a little news flash online. They said that there is an award and if you really want it, they’ll mail it to you. Actually you just reminded me that I gotta go find them again and ask them for my award!

I don’t know how the show won a GLAAD award to tell you the truth. It’s all about the worst possible behavior of a Latina lesbian. And you know, I don’t know, I sort of defame myself. So I’m not quite sure how I got the award, but I’m very glad. And they sent some scouting people to the show and I got put in as a nominee. I think I’ve been nominated before but this is the first time I’ve won. So, I’m not gonna argue with that.

AE: So there was no fat check or showgirls or limo ride around town or any cool shit like that? Did they even invite you to the ceremony?
MG: No, no. What they do is have a bunch of ceremonies around the country, like at various locations, they have one in New York and one in San Francisco. Then they announce the awards. I’m not even sure if this is one they announce. They’re very big with the celebrities.